Can you believe I got these things up before 10 pm?? GO ME!!!

Jennifer Hudson needs additional media training. [Defamer]

Mario Lopez and Dancing with the Stars partner Katrina Smirnoff are doing the horizontal tango, if you know what I mean. [MollyGood]

Reese Witherspoon(’s breasts) look amazing at the Kennedy Center Honors. [Yeeeah!]

Jen and Vince’s reps join forces to put the final nail in the Vaughniston coffin: “Jennifer and Vince mutually agreed to end their relationship.” The reps admit the two broke up in October, after Jen visited Vince in London. So, you know, right around when the blogosphere said they did. [Dirty Laundry]

Paul Walker has no need for talent. Good thing, too. [Celebrity Smack]

Scarlett Johansson: “Please masturbate to me. I want you to. I need you to. Do it three, four, five times a day. Before bed, in the morning, at the office, at your children’s day care, between rounds of golf, in front of your girlfriend, at your mother’s house, in the boss’s office, in the cafeteria, onto the mashed potatoes, anywhere, everywhere, I don’t care, just as long as you’re masturbating to me.” [Agent Bedhead]

Lance Bass says that he and Reichen are still trying to work things out. He made the statement via MySpace, which is totally Hollywood’s hottest PR agency right now. [ICYDK]

Photos from Johnny Depp’s first wedding in 1983. [popbytes]

This is a recap of Perez Hilton’s visit to Howard Stern’s Sirius radio show this morning, via MarksFriggin.com. I’ve posted the whole recap here for those interested, but have bolded what I feel are the most interesting tidbits. If you heard the show, and there’s something missing here, email us or leave it in the comments!

Howard said that he gets a copy of The Onion newspaper every morning and it’s pretty funny. He read some of the headlines and an article that he thought was pretty good. He had to get to Perez Hilton (PerezHilton.com) but Fred told him he had to take a break first. A short time later Will came walking in with Perez so Howard asked Will if he actually listens to the show out there. He told Perez to just come in and sit down since he was already in there.

Howard asked Perez if he’s getting famous now that he’s got this web site going on because he sees him hanging with Paris Hilton and other young celebrities out there. Perez said that he wasn’t popular in school, he had kids picking on him and grabbing his back fat when he was in an all boy’s school.

Perez said he now has like 4 million people checking out his web site every day so the site is huge. Howard said that it’s obvious that he will never bad mouth Paris Hilton because she’s his friend. Perez said he still gets calls from her when she gets mad at something he writes.

Howard asked Perez what the last thing was that Paris got upset about. Perez said that it was a cartoon of her that she didn’t like. [Ed: I seem to remember a cartoon on there a few days ago of Lindsay, Paris and Britney, bare-bottomed, but it's nowhere to be found now...anyone else remember this?] Howard said he read that there are rumors that Britney Spears and Paris Hilton might be lesbians. Perez said that he wouldn’t be surprised at all because both of them have said they like girls. Perez said that they probably have eaten each other out. Howard asked him if he’s ever smelled pussy on Paris’ breath. Perez said he wouldn’t even know what pussy would smell like.

Howard asked Perez if he thinks that Britney is having a break down because she’s out partying and flashing her beaver everywhere. Perez said that Britney has been a party girl for a long time and while she was married she was pregnant so now she’s back to partying again. That’s all it is. Howard said he saw the pictures of Britney Spears’ vagina on Perez’s web site and it looked like there was an odd piece of flesh down there. Perez said that she may have had a tummy tuck and that might be what the skin was.

Howard said that Beth goes on his web site like 4 or 5 times a day and she shows him what’s new. Perez said that the last time he was on the show he had broken the news that Lance Bass was coming out. That same day Lance announced it. Perez said that Lance has now broken up with his boyfriend and he feels bad about that. Howard read that Perez thinks that they broke up because they were both ”bottoms” in the relationship. Perez said he has friends who know the two of them so he hears things.

Howard asked what happens if two gay guys are bottoms. Perez said that sometimes the best tops used to be bottoms. He said he’s not a bottom himself.

Howard asked Perez about his web site and how he confirms his stories. Perez said he does like to confirm stuff before he puts them up. Howard said he saw Perez arguing with a photographer one time over the use of their photographs. Perez said that some of them like him and actually send him the pictures. Perez said that he got a picture from a fan who had a picture of Priscilla Presley pulling back her 17 year old daughter’s hair while she’s making out with her 24 year old boyfriend years ago. That picture ended up in the newspaper today and Perez thinks that it actually helps to sell pictures when they appear on his web site.

Perez said that when he started his blog two and a half years ago, he wanted to write about celebrities because they’re so much more interesting than he is. Howard asked Perez about outing people on his site. Perez said that he always gets confirmation about people being gay before he outs them. Howard said that some of them may not want to be outed though so maybe that’s not right.

Perez claims that he knows that Clay Aiken is gay but his record label won’t let him come out. Perez said that people tend to believe the artist and Lance Bass could have continued on pretending to be straight for years.

Perez talked about the face to face meeting he had with Fergie from the Black Eyed Peas recently after he had bad mouthed her so much on his site. He said she seemed to like him at this event he saw her at but he will continue to write bad stuff about her.

Perez also claims that he has celebrities who will call him and tell him stories. He said that John Stamos called him before he did Howard’s show last time and asked him to promote his TV show. Howard asked him if John shares stories about Rebecca Romijn. Perez said he hasn’t heard anything but Howard told him he has a lot of dirt on her and it could be big news if he could give it up. He won’t spill the story because John has asked him to keep that stuff quiet.

Howard asked Perez if his web site is doing well. He said it’s never been better but he has started his own merchandise thing to help offset his legal costs. There are people suing him over the pictures he uses on his site and he thinks the only way he can fight it is in court. He said that he’s fighting for himself and for all of the other bloggers out there.

Howard asked Perez who the biggest celebrity asshole is. Perez said that Jesse Metcalf is one. He also said that Jennifer Aniston is another big asshole. Howard asked him who the hottest star is right now and who he has to write about. Perez said that every day is different so it was hard to say. He said that Brad and Angelina are always hot but right now Britney Spears is really hot.

Howard wondered why Michael Jackson has fallen off the face of the earth. Perez said that’s because he left the country. Howard asked Perez when he was last banged in the ass. Perez said it was a long time ago. He changed the story to when he last banged a guy in the ass but Perez said it’s been a long time. He did blow a guy about a week ago.

A caller asked Perez where he can find the Britney Spears pussy slip pictures. Perez said you can search his site with the ‘’star seeker” thing on the left side of his web site. That led to Perez talking about Britney for a short time and how she had 3 pussy slips in one week.

Another caller asked Howard how he can have this guy on the show when he says that the kid from Kyle XY is gay when the kid has come on the show and denied it. Perez said he’s heard that the guy has a new boyfriend and he still insists that the guy is gay. The caller asked Perez when he’s going to die of AIDS and said that if he ever sees this guy he’s going to slap the shit out of him. Perez said he must be doing something right to elicit such a violent act from someone.

Howard wrapped up with Perez and gave him another plug for his web site and talked about how often his girlfriend checks out his site. He went to break after that.

Apparently Britney is having as harmful an impact on Paris as Paris is having on her. After all the time Paris has spent with Britney and her two sons, she now wants to have kiddos of her own. “It’s been my dream to have four babies by 30,” says Hilton, 25, who probably ought to sit down and do the math on that one. “I look after animals,” she says, “so I’d have a lot to give my kids.” Sheesh. Paris totally gives these quotes because she knows people will write about how ridiculous they sound. And it works.

Britney, meanwhile, is likely not up for Mother of the Year right now. Page Six reports that Los Angeles Department of Children & Family Services “has been calling Britney trying to set up a meeting with her, so they can check on [Spears' baby sons Sean Preston and Jaden James]. The calls started after this recent bout of bizarre public behavior.” I seriously doubt this. I don’t think L.A.’s Family Services is in the business of knocking on starlets’ doors just because they’re out partying whilst being mothers. While this is certainly not the most motherly behavior, something tells me Sean and Jayden are not sitting home alone starving while Britney is out flashing her goodies. I’m sure they’re being looked after by her mother or her manager or any one of the other 5000 people on their parents’ payroll, not unlike the rest of the diapered population of Malibu.

Blind Item:

“Which new pair of best friends are actually more? When they get back to their hotels or homes, the clothes come off.”

Um, so Britney is doing coke and Paris Hilton. Jesus save us all.

Beyonce is trying to act like she doesn’t care that Jennifer Hudson is totally getting the better reviews for “Dreamgirls” but she isn’t doing a very good job at it. At her film premiere last night she posed for pictures and then abruptly left to hop a plane for her boyfriend JZ’s birthday party. I guess she was too much of a diva to actually sit through the movie with the rest of the cast.

Here are some quotes from miss Beyonce regarding the buzz around the film…

“I’m already a star. I already have nine Grammys. Everyone knows I can sing. I did [Dreamgirls] because I wanted people to know that I can act and I can play someone so different from myself.”

“I knew that the character that I played wasn’t the star … I’m already a star. I already have nine Grammys. Everyone knows I can sing. I wish I could have gained 20 pounds and played Effie.”

Uh, huh you are just trying to make yourself feel better because…

1) You were supposed to get the Oscar nod for your performance but it is Jennifer Hudson’s performance that, according to New York Times reporter David Carr, “seals the show.”

2) Her Majesty Oprah actually called Jennifer personally to let her know that she had a “transcendent performance.” Oprah just doesn’t call everybody personally.

3) Jennifer gets the good songs in the movie including the show stopping “You’re Gonna Love Me.” Which is shockingly good. Nobody has said much about your voice.

4) All the press in the world isn’t going to make people stop about talking about Jennifer Hudson. Oh ya, and you starved yourself to do this movie and she is a full figured beauty who has stolen your star.

I’m so excited to see this movie I can’t even explain.

“Dreamgirls” opens December 15th in (NY/LA) and on Christmas Day everywhere else. Go see it!

After his lawyer assured the world that Lane Garrison was not intoxicated while driving the Land Rover that crashed into a tree, killing a 17-year-old boy, the teenagers at the party he attended beforehand are telling a different story. The detectives over at TMZ tracked them down, and they say that Garrison did “several shots” of Grey Goose before heading off with the teenagers to buy more liquor (and not, as his lawyer said, to meet a female friend at his apartment). Also, TMZ learns that Garrison met the teens originally at a gas station, and not at a supermarket, as was previously stated by his lawyer.

The eyewitnesses also mention that there are photographs of Garrison consuming liquor at this party, and you’d better believe that the TMZ crew has members stationed outside the homes of everyone who could possibly have had a camera at that party. They’ll post the pictures just as soon as they’ve worked out a suitable royalties contract with the legal team of whichever high-school kid took the best photos (this is Beverly Hills, after all), and I’ll link you to it when it’s up.

In an interesting twist, it was revealed yesterday that Garrison was sent to live with Jessica Simpson and her family in Texas, back when her father was a minister, because he was a “troubled teen.” Garrison has stated that he and Jessica “basically grew up together.”

New York City is on the cusp of banning the use of trans fats in all of its eateries. By mid 2008 many restaurants will not only have to ban the use of these heart-clogging fats, but also post calorie counts on their menus.
This means that all of the places that use deep fat fryers, which are used to make many of my favorite dishes, will have to find alternate oils. Big fast food restaurants are obviously freaking out over this since they cook their foods in quite frightening ways to begin with.
I wouldn’t say that New Yorkers are fat, but on a serious note, getting kids to eat food that won’t eventually kill them down the line is always a good idea. I hope that my occasional chocolate cake doughnut from Dunkin Doughnuts will still taste the same cause mmmmm, I like doughnuts.