The 9th Annual Michael Douglas & Friends Celebrity Golf Event this weekend at Trump National Golf Club in Ranchos Palos Verdes brought out a veritable who’s-who of 1995. Douglas was there with his granddaughter wife Catherine Zeta-Jones, and they were accompanied by Heather Locklear, Sam Jackson, Cheryl Ladd (who?), Josh Duhamel, Mark Wahlberg, Kenny Fucking G, Alice Cooper and … drumroll please … Haley Joel Osment, whose managers clearly believe that if he plays golf with old people all day we will forget about that little DUI thing last summer. No dice, kids.

Alyson Hannigan rocks the bikini. [Drunken Stepfather]

Check out video clips from Gwen Stefani performing in LA. [popbytes]

Tracey Morgan has to wear an alcohol-detecting ankle bracelet for 90 days as a result of his DUI. Now that’s outrageous and egregious! [Celebrity Smack]

Conan O’Brien cops a feel on Tyra Banks. [Ninja Dude]

Hooray hooray!!! Studio 60 is coming back!!! WATCH IT, MOTHERF***ERS. That was a close call. [SOW]

The best part of this is the knowledge that someone somewhere is getting his rocks off to these images of Paris Hilton’s corpse. [Allie Is Wired]

Why stop with the tits? Heidi Montag got a new nose, too. Next up will have to be a new back to carry your celebrity, Heidi, because Lauren Conrad’s is done with you. [IBBB]

Look, I want Britney Spears to get sober and sort her life out and regain some measure of sanity. But please, God, can it wait until she writes this tell-all? [The Blemish]

Is Angelina Jolie anorexic? [Cele|bitchy]

If so, she might want to take some tips from Kate Bosworth, who seems to be at a semi-healthy weight again. At least I can’t count her rib bones in this bikini. [Warship]

Awww … celebs as babies! [Celebslam]

Jonathan Lipnicki, in stark contrast with his career, has matured. [Agent Bedhead]

A review of Fantasia in The Color Purple. [DListed]

Find out after the jump.

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Sooo excited for the movie (although this is a clip from the show).

Joss Stone thinks that maybe Britney just wanted a little airing out.

We shouldn’t be mad at Britney Spears because she didn’t wear underwear. That’s her choice. She wasn’t hurting anybody. That was her. She decided not to wear underwear. Maybe she wanted a little breeze. That’s her decision. But we should be mad at the guy who posted it on the Internet. What an [expletive], what a [expletive] [expletive]. That’s a really mean, nasty, malicious, terrible thing to do to somebody.

When you flash your cha cha to a bunch of paps and you are also hanging out with Paris Hilton at the time we have no other choice to post it on the internet. I have a feeling she knew the va jay jay was going to end up on the web…why else would you listen to the drone of that celebutard?

Julian Schnabel at the Breakthrough 2007- NFAA youngARTs Event shows us why old dudes shouldn’t try to be hip. From the waist up I am not thrilled with the outfit but it isn’t tragic. Waist down he is funky in a bad way. Those are some hip shoes but they should be worn by Zack Efron not some random old dude. I’m also worried that your sarong is going to fall off. I don’t want to see old guy naked.

As you can probably tell, Evil T and I are both a little obsessed with this concept of the Penis Fish from Grey’s Anatomy last night. As such, I’ve put together what I like to call my “Penis Fish Montage.” Enjoy.