Of course not! Sober Lindsay Lohan is so out. Drunk Lindsay is back in style. While other celebrities were out enjoying the sun and playing with the dolphins in the Bahamas Lindsay was getting wasted and dancing in a DJ booth…wow, like that doesn’t hapen every weekend. According to USA Today (I love that mainstream papers also love Lindsay Lohan is drunk gossip)…

Lindsay Lohan landed in the Bahamas Friday, and while she wouldn’t speak with reporters all weekend, she was a force on the island nonetheless.

After taking in a Janet Jackson concert Friday night, she partied at Atlantis’ Aura nightclub until the wee hours. The actress started the evening sipping water, but much later was seen with a cigarette in one hand and a bottle of Jack Daniels in the other.

In her roped-off VIP section, she got very cozy with beau Calum Best, a hot model in the U.K. The smell of marijuana wafted through the area. Best shared whatever he was smoking with Fantastic Four star Chris Evans, who nodded and held his breath before exhaling. (The next day, when asked about the scene, Evans said, “Goodness gracious. No comment.”)

Lindsay sure loves to party. I wonder if she was a little upset that Georgia Rule did not rule at the box office this past weekend. She’s got some hot new man candy but that film career isn’t working out so well. I just am waiting for the drunk Lindsay photos to surface on the internet.

Denise Richards says she didn’t sleep with her best friend’s husband while they were married; she waited until a week or so after they were split up. Jesus, people are so quick to judge. [Celebrity Smack]

I love that Kim Kardashian is staring at her own tits on the red carpet. I told you guys she was going to be a big star. [Derek Hail]

Last summer, Lindsay Lohan was all about bikinis and Harry Morton. This summer, he’s been exchanged for British model Callum Best, but her relationship with the bikinis is ever-lasting. [The Blemish]

Molly Shannon is back on SNL, if only for one night. [popbytes]

A collection of pictures of celebs giving the finger to paparazzi. [Celeb Slam]

Joe Francis is going to jail forever. Yay! [Cele|bitchy]

Nicky Hilton is coping with the stress of her sister’s legal troubles by wearing Spandex. [Drunken Stepfather]

Sophia Bush, on the other hand, thinks the whole thing is really funny. [Glitterati]

T.R. Knight was shocked — shocked! — that some people thought maybe coming out of the closet wouldn’t be stellar for his career. And he plans to prove them wrong, by continuing to talk about it to every magazine that will listen. [POTP]

Thank you, Paris Hilton.

How cute are Mario and Karina?? I am so happy that they still are “together.” They really look adorable.

Charting Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen’s nose jobs. Remember, kids, if you have your nose opened up because all the cocaine deviated your septum, it’s not really plastic surgery. [CityRag]

Damn, the Buffy chicks used to be hot. [Geno]

Martha Stewart chats with Hayden Panettiere. [popbytes]

Cameron Diaz expects you to believe that her life has been “hell” for the past few years. [INO]

Maybe she’s so upset because Justin Timberlake might be porking Madonna. [Agent Bedhead]

OJ Simpson gets booted from a Kentucky steakhouse because, well, because he killed his wife. [Bossip]

Johnny Depp is probably going to get married this summer. [ICYDK]

Christina Aguilera hops on the celebrity fragrance wagon. [DS]

A taxi driver almost killed Lindsay Lohan this week. You know what they say, Linds, if the coke doesn’t get you, the NYC cabbies will. [IDLYITW]

Kelly Clarkson looks cute on TRL. [Just Jared]

I have to admit, Kim Kardashian still looks really pretty, even without make-up. [Derek Hail]

I am really disturbed with myself right now. Jean Luc Picard made an appearance at a London theater today, and is, somehow, still way freakin’ hot to me. Is this just me? Why do I feel this way? He’s got to be like 100 years old right now. Harrison Ford aged out about ten years ago for me, and Sean Connery around the same time period. But Patrick Stewart? Still. So. Hot. Why??

Cameron Diaz: “We all suffer when Paris suffers.” Heh. [Cele|bitchy]

The celebrities you’d most like to bang. And not with a hammer. [Pajiba]

Brooke Burke is still hot. [Derek Hail]

Carmen Electra wrote a book called How to Be Sexy. Now if only someone could lend her a copy of How to Stay Married she’d be all set. [Jordan]

Um, Victoria, why were you shopping at Abercrombie & Fitch anyway? [Celebrity Smack]

It’s not enough for Dina Lohan to live vicariously through her daughter’s fame; now she’s using it to land herself on TV. [The Blemish]

K-Fed calls Britney’s new man “trash.” [Celebslam]

Jodi Sweetin is back on the smack. Time for a serious father-daughter talk. [popbytes]

Akon is sorry for that whole “simulated rape” thing. [DListed]

Kate Moss in a see-through dress. [Drunken Stepfather]

Nick Lachey throws down. [POTP]