After a whole lotta hype, Susan Boyle performed again on Britain’s Got Talent, this time singing “Memory” from Cats. Personally, I was comparatively underwhelmed by this performance — she was behind the band most of the time, and more than one of the notes was a little pitchy. That didn’t seem to disturb the audience or the judges, though — she got a standing ovation and a ton of praise, even from Simon Cowell. “You know what, I just want to apologize because of the way we treated you before you sang the first time,” he said. “You made me and everyone else look very stupid and I’m very happy for you, very proud for you.”

What do you guys think? Does Susan deserve the hype?

For kicks and giggles, I put the performance of one of her competitors, dance troupe Diversity, after the jump.

Elton John’s yearly party is super exclusive and tough to get an invite to.  Having said that, I’m having a few “What the fuck,” moments.

What the fuck?  Simon Cowell and Terri Seymour are back together?

What the fuck?  What is that French’s Golden Mustard get-up Dita Von Teese wearing?

What the fuck?  Rachel Griffiths in head-to-toe grey flannel?  Is she fat or just pregnant?  Oh, she’s pregnant.  Still…that’s not right.

Bai Ling?  Just, what the fuck?

Ugh, I had more to say, but I looked at too many pictures of Posh and now I must sleep…can’t…keep…eyes…open.

Simon Cowell has always been a hero of mine.  I think my love for himstarted a few years back when he said Beyonce wasn’t a good singer, didn’t have a good body and that he found her fame mystifying.  But now Beyonce is performing on December 13th’s episode of X Factor and they are all friendly.  Sellout.

But he redeemed himself a bit this week in an Access Hollywood interview.  When asked about the addition of the newest American Idol judge Kara DioGuardi:

You know what, it’s like when you’ve had dinner with three friends for years and now someone else joins the table — it’s a bit odd.  That’s what it was like at the beginning. I genuinely couldn’t make up my mind whether I liked it or not. And then, when she was doing the Hollywood round she started to grow on me and I think she’s ballsy.

When asked if Kara and Paula were walking on eggshells around one another during Hollywood Week:

A little bit, but you know what it’s like… — when you work with other people you never want the people that you work with to do well.  You don’t.  It’s just not in your human nature to want that.

Regarding the success of the other American Idol judges:

If I read about their deals, I’m not exactly opening bottles of champagne in joy because something good is happening in their lives.  I’m not like that and trust me, they’re not doing the same for me.

On how Simon has made the world a more beautiful place:

She’s looking better and I really mean this — I think I have made her look better, and I’m not kidding here… Physically [she] definitely looks better since she’s been working with me.  I think she just got to terms with the way I like people to look and I think she changed her wardrobe, her hair, because she heard me saying, ‘I like this’ and ‘I like that,’ so I definitely had a positive affect on the way that she looks.

Then I realized during the Hollywood round, she’s actually quite funny.  I think she knows what she’s talking about, so she’s growing on me… She’s quite hot now actually. But I promise you, you’ll see the difference. She looks better now.

I love how he’s just like “Yeah, I don’t really want others to succeed.”  Isn’t he beyond arrogant?  Love him.  Still.

Simon Cowell’s lawyers are warning UK newspapers not to harass their client after a tracking device was found attached to his Rolls Royce last week.

Law firm Carter-Ruck sent the warning letter to national newspapers on Friday after consulting with the presenter’s publicist, Max Clifford, who told MediaGuardian.co.uk that “enough is enough”.

According to Clifford, the letter pointed out that the use of a tracking device is illegal and could lead to prosecution.

He added that the identity of the journalist who allegedly attached the device is known to him and the individual concerned has been approached.

“We know who he is and we have marked his card and told him to never do anything like that again,” Clifford said.

“We have always played the game and we are not precious but this is way beyond anything acceptable. So Carter-Ruck has sent a letter out to everybody warning them about this and making clear that it is unacceptable,” he added.

“Simon has been putting up with this for seven years, with people approaching him at all hours and we know that we have got to have working relationships with the papers but within acceptable boundaries.”

Dude, if I were Simon Cowell, I would take that dude to court.

I’d also like to clarify that this appears to have been a tracking device, not a bug, as some other blogs have reported. So it’s not like they were listening in on conversations inside the car, they were just tracking its whereabouts. Still horrendous and totally inexcusable, but it’s not like we can look forward to hours and hours of Simon’s personal conversations showing up online.

I love Simon Cowell, because he never met a red carpet look that couldn’t be improved with a pack of smokes. Seriously, this dude walks the red carpet with a pack of cigarettes in his hand like 75% of the time. No one else has balls like that. I love it so much. Here’s the most recent incident, at the Music Industry Trust Awards last month.

Here’s what Simon has to say about his recent split from longtime girlfriend Terri Seymour:

“She wants a different path in life, and I totally respect her for it. We will be the best of mates, but I think in relationships, you have to be totally honest. I have always been and I know Terri knows that … I find women confusing really. When you hook up and date, you’re both honest about what you want. I have never ever said that I want children or marriage. I know some people find it hard to fathom, but it’s me, it’s who I am. Bottom line is I am married to my job. When people moan about been a celebrity, I think ‘Oh please, sort yourself out – it’s the greatest job in the world.’ I wake up daily thanking my lucky stars, but to throw marriage into that mix is not right. I have seen too many celebrity marriages that on paper make a great mix, fall apart through ego and just plain celebrity madness .. There is no one new in my life. I can honestly say some of my best friends are girls, but we’re not dating, and that is that. Forget any lurid tabloid headlines. Myself and Terri will remain firm friends. We’re grown ups.”

Fabulous. Now I get to resume not caring about Simon Cowell until he’s caught sucking face with Paula Abdul for the contact high.

Simon Cowell and his long-time girlfriend Terri Seymour have called it quits. Or more appropriately, she dumped him. Simon’s rep, Max Clifford, confirmed to People:

Terri phoned Simon and finished it in September, about six weeks ago.  They are going to remain close friends. Simon thinks the world of Terri and that isn’t going to change. He also understands her reason for ending it.  In the past Terri has said that she wants kids but that just isn’t Simon. 

He’s always said he never wanted kids.  Why do women always think they can change a guy’s mind?  And just once, it would be so great for a spokesperson to say “Yes, they’ve broken up.  No, they won’t be friends.  She’s pissed at him for wasting six years of her life.”

Honestly, my undying allegiance goes to anyone who walks the red carpet with a pack of Camels and a Bic in his hand.

Here’s the love of my life, Simon Cowell, with girlfriend Terri Seymour at Elton John’s Oscar party.

Love it, love it, love it.

Everyone who’s anyone in London showed up on Tuesday night for the launch of the Christmas line of Kate Moss’s Topshop line.

It’s like the more heroin this girl injects, the more people want to buy things from her. No wonder she doesn’t want to quit.

Celebs who showed up include Simon Cowell, Jade Jagger, Elle Macpherson, Lily Allen, Naomi Campbell, and Sophie Dahl.

Quoth the Simon Cowell:

“Do I prefer Kelly Clarkson’s music to Bob Dylan’s? Yes. I’ve never bought a Dylan record. A singing poet? It just bores me to tears. I’ve got to tell you, if I had 10 Dylans in the final of ‘American Idol,’ we would not be getting 30 million viewers a week. I don’t believe the Bob Dylans of this world would make ‘American Idol’ a better show.”

Well I don’t either because Bob Dylan is a cool 65 years old. That’s even older than that Taylor guy who won last time. Also, anyone who likes Bob Dylan is probably pretty mellow. Not a lot of hopped up folk fans, so I’d say Cowell is going after a pretty soft target.

In fairness, Kelly Clarkson sucks pretty heavily sometimes too.