Just what Hollywood needs, another overpriced, C-list laden, paparazzi covered bar!

The opening night of new club Voyeur went down on Thursday and tons of celebs came out (read: got free bottle service) to be there for all the madness. Samantha Ronson, Gerard Butler, Shane West and Shanna Moakler were snapped headed in and out of the club by the paparazzi, who must have been taking a break from standing in front of Teddy’s or Guys and Dolls or wherever the hell the kids are going these days. Bardot. Is that one of them? H-Wood? Is that still open? Hyde? Les Deux? Opera? Anyone wanna play a game of LA-club based Scategories?

Needless to say, Travis Barker is way more focused on publicly insulting a woman he once loved enough to create humans with, and so not focused on what is best for his children.  What would be best is shutting the fuck up and calling his lawyer if he thinks his kids are in danger.  Because saying “My babies mom is a pile of shit” has nothing to do with the threat of child molestation.  It’s just an insult for the sake of insult.

Ugh, I guess I did have something to say about it after all.  And for the record, I will definitely still be following this short-sighted twit.  Oh, and he JUST deleted the “pile of shit” tweet.  Success!

My Tweet

His Direct Message to Me

My Tweet

His Direct Message to Me

I wanted to share Travis Barker’s latest Tweet with you.  Sadly, it’s proof that not even a near-death experience can provide illumination for everyone.  You know, maybe Shanna Moakler — that’s who he’s referring to — is a pile of shit.  I don’t know — I don’t know her.  It doesn’t even matter.  She’s the mother of his children and putting these thoughts in print does no service to their children.

Sometimes a fuckwit is just always going to be a fuckwit.  Not even a narrow escape from death was enough to give Travis Barker perspective.

I guess these two are officially toast now, but between this incident and Shanna having enough balls to publicly blast Katie Holmes’ dancing skills, I’m going Team Shanna all the way!

Just yesterday Shanna Moakler smiled and shook hands with Miss California Carrie Prejean at a press conference in which Donald Trump announced that Prejean would retain her crown.  Maybe she was just being a professional but it would have been much more exciting if she had stormed out.  Or started attacking Donald Trump’s Oompa Loompa skin with a loofah.  Decorum sucks.

Anyway, Moakler’s affection toward Prejean, like every boob that comes out of California, was a fake display.

However, in a move that restores my faith, today Moakler resigned from her director post for the Miss California USA pageant.  The statement released reads as follows:

Since the press conference yesterday, I had a chance to think about what has taken place, and I feel that at this time it is in my best interest to resign from the Miss California USA organization.

I cannot with a clear conscious move forward supporting and promoting the Miss Universe Organization when I no longer believe in it, or the contracts I signed committing myself as a youth. I want to be a role model for young women with high hopes of pageantry, but now feel it more important to be a role model for my children. I am sorry and hope I have not let any young supporters down but wish them the best of luck in fulfilling their dreams.

I give her credit for standing up for what she believes in.  With this brave move she also has secured the everlasting love of the gays.  She’s the new Liza.  Or Cher.  Or Beet.

FINALLY Shanna Moakler is doing something I can get behind. The former Miss USA — who’s currently the executive director of the Miss California USA pageant — teamed up with Miss USA 2006 first runner-up Tamiko Nash and last year’s titleholder Raquel Beezley did a photo shoot last night for Adam Bouska and NOH8, a photo campaign to support efforts to overturn Proposition 8.

“We never expected to have so many beauty queens participate. The whole campaign, obviously, is not a direct message to Miss California, but now she happened to have put herself in the line of fire,” Bouska says. “If Carrie is going to go out there with her message, then we have to go out there and make sure the voices of these girls are heard. And that they are what Miss USA should stand for, too.”

Absolutely!

For those of you who were wondering, the California Supreme Court will rule on the challenge to Prop 8 no later than June 3. You can click here to register to be notified as soon as they have a decision. Stay tuned!

When news hit yesterday that Travis and Shanna Moakler had once again split up, sources said that Shanna was cheating on Travis with Gerard Butler while he was in the hospital. Now Shanna has hit the Internet to tell her side of the story on her MySpace blog, claiming that she found romantic emails from other women sent to Travis. Ladies, ladies, ladies. When will you learn? It is NEVER a good idea to go through your man’s email. You’ll never like what you find.

Travis and I were very much together in September when the horrific crashed happened, not only did I fly to Georgia I stayed by his side the entire stay and also for the bus ride home to LA, I think any human being with a heart and for the love of any good friend , never mind father of their children and lover would do the same, After arriving in LA and getting settled in the new hospital, I came across numerous romantic emails with MANY other woman, some famous , some I personally knew, all heart breaking. and the woman involved you know who you are and should be ashamed of yourself. I also came across emails where employees of my ex were writing comments on gossip networks like TMZ and Perez Hilton, attacking me as a woman and a mother. I Think those were more painful then the infidelities. As anyone can imagine, I was devastated, this is when I stopped going to the LA hospital, I knew and made sure even after what I learned he had a strong support system in place with friends and family, and I made it clear to them why I would be dismissing myself, at that point with the new information revealed to me I considered myself SINGLE and thou In my heart hoped we would remain friends and good parents had no intentions of getting back together. It was a painful time that no one unless they had lived it has the right to judge. Any actions I may or may have not done after this time, mean nothing.

I have been attacked by my Ex and his friends in the press for years at this point, my ability as a mother ( which to me is the cruelest thing you can do to any mother) my character and my integrity. I have never verbally bashed him as a father. I didn’t even bash him after the infamous blogs years ago, I have never went on different social networks and made campaigns of hate and slander, In fact MANY times I have had to bite my tongue and try to be the bigger person. I have tried to always put the lives and thoughts and feelings of my children first. I am by no means an angel, and I have made many mistakes, but a woman can only turn her cheek so many times.

Eh. Give it another month. They’ll be back together.

Once upon a time I was a software developer. I never thought that training would come in handy in this job. But I think what I need to do in the future is just write software that automates posts like this. Travis and Shanna break up. Lindsay and Samantha fight. Tom and Katie’s marriage is on the rocks. Britney Spears hates her father. Etc, etc. Because I know a lot of you think this is an easy job, but you try putting a different spin on the same stories week after week after week for years. It is exhausting. Travis and Shanna are my worst nightmare. I hate trying to spin this any other way than the truth: They are both highly unstable individuals in a highly unstable relationship, and, sadly, there are children involved.

The couple — who divorced in 2004 but reconciled last September after Barker’s near-fatal plane crash — called it quits “after a nasty fight broke out at his house last night and cops were called…[when] Shanna started freaking out and acting irrational,” a source tells Us. No charges were filed.

“Travis confronted Shanna about her having an affair with Gerard Butler while he was in the hospital recovering,” the source says. Butler and Moakler were spotted getting cozy at the Hollywood opening of Shin Korean BBQ last October. Barker “just wants to focus on his music and his children right now. He is done with her drama,” the source says.

In February, Barker told Us he “couldn’t be happier” after reuniting with Moakler, who was spotted wearing her wedding band at a Grammys party. Barker’s rep tells Us: “After surviving the plane crash his driving force in life is the love he has for his kids. He is tired of all other drama and is ready to move on.”

A rep for Moakler tells Us: “They did break up but Shanna never cheated on Travis while he was in the hospital. Furthermore, Shanna is tired of playing out their personal relationship in the press.”

Barker, 33, and Moakler, 34, are parents to Landon Asher and Alabama Luella. She also has a daughter, Atiana Cecilia, with ex Oscar de la Hoya. They starred in the MTV reality show “Meet the Barkers” in 2006.

“The babies are the most important thing right now,” adds the insider. “Shanna cheated on him and then told everyone they were in love again while she was having an affair and he was recovering from the accident.”

Shanna, I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: YOU PARTICIPATED IN A TELEVISION SHOW ABOUT YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH TRAVIS BARKER. Remember it? It was called Meet the Barkers and it was about your personal relationships. You never get to expect the press to butt out of it now. It is an unreasonable request. You wanted the spotlight. You got it. Now deal.

(The pics of Shanna making out with Gerard Butler are here.)

…even if you throw yourself and ‘Divorce Party’ with a cake that looks like this.

Shanna spilled the beans and said that she and Travis want to get hitched again.

“We would like to renew our vows and have another wedding,” former Miss USA Moakler told Us Magazine this week. “It’s not so much about the wedding but about having a celebration of each other and getting through all the crazy things we’ve been through.” Shanna added.

“When you almost lose a loved one, it makes you appreciate things you took for granted,”

 I’m happy for them because they have kids, and unless your parents spend all day trying to rip each others throats out it’s nice to have both of them around. Moakler and Barker initially divorced in ‘06, and then the incident with the cake you see above occurred. Since then Shanna’s had celebutard beef with Paris, and been seen sniffing around Gerard Butler, but who knows? Maybe these two crazy kids really are meant to be together. If not, the end-of-marriage fireworks should be a-maz-ing.

You think they’ll put this go-around on TV?

First she’s hanging out at the IHOP at 5am and making citizen arrests and now she’s gettin her poker face on at The 7th Annual World Poker Tour Invitational.

Who is this person? 

Also at the Invitational were the likes of Benji Madden, Jennifer Tilly, Shanna Moakler, Don Cheadle (whom inexplicably appears to be wearing a turtleneck), William Hung (nice to see he’s still getting invitations) and Daniel Baldwin. Mandatory positive: Daniel has very pretty eyes. 

While Travis Barker continues to undergo surgeries related to his devastating September plane crash, Shanna Moakler, well, makes out in clubs with Gerard Butler.

Awesome.

The former Mrs. Barker was spotted boozing it up (vodka Red Bulls, if you care) at the opening of Bardot nightclub on Saturday night, just as Travis was talking shit about her on his blog from his hospital bed.

I want to have so many different reactions to this. They range from “How insane is it that we’re back to caring about Shanna Moakler’s every move since her ex-husband almost died in a plane wreck?” to “What the fuck are you doing getting wasted when your ex-husband’s in the hospital and your children need your constant emotional support?” to “Who the hell are we to insist Shanna sit home and cry all day about this?”

I don’t know how I feel. Shanna Moakler does this to me. I never know how to feel about her actions. She is emotionally confusing to me. I always go back and forth between wanting to reprimand her and wanting to hug her.

Photogs caught Shanna Moakler in tears as she left the burn unit at Doctors Hospital in Georgia. She’s spent hours by ex-husband Travis Barker’s side as he recovers from critical burns.

Aw, Shanna!

Hang in there, baby!!!

Reports that Nicole Richie and Paris Hilton are in Georgia appear to be false, although Mandy Moore is reportedly there with DJ AM.