If I were really hackneyed and wrote articles for E! Online, the lead-in for this story might go a little something like this:

Oh no she didn’t!

Kiddie superstar Miley Cyrus was seen wearing the same dress as sexy Samantha on the set of the Sex and the City 2 movie. Talk about a cat fight! It’s the kitten versus the cougar! Me-ow!

Thankfully, I don’t write for them, and you don’t have to endure trash like that. I’m also not going to divulge the plot points surrounding this scene and ruin part of the movie for you, but feel free to guess.  So much has been leaked about this movie, I’m starting to feel like I don’t even need to go see it because I’ve already the entire story in gossip website articles.

I’ll just say this: Samantha wears it better.

I know people take SATC very seriously and I’m feeling kind today, so I’m going to discuss the plot leak after the jump.  You’re most welcome.

Okay, peeps.  Now, for all of us who don’t give a fuck, Big loses a bunch of money, moves to London for a job and lives in a one-bedroom apartment.  He has an affair — huge shock, really! — and Carrie discovers that she’s pregnant.  Is it just me or does this sound like it was ripped straight from the Lifetime movies rejected screenplay pile?

I’ll just tell you right now how this is going to end:  Big fucks some chick, Carrie is devastated yet her girls rally around and support her through her pregnancy — a pregnancy that she won’t tell Big about.  She’ll have the baby — all the harpies will be in the delivery room with her — and Big will show up at the last second.  They’ll reunite just in time for Carrie to accept even more horrible relationship treatment in Sex And The City 3:  We Haven’t Bled This Dry Yet.

Caption this picture of Lindsay Lohan   Aubrey O’Day   Perez Hilton Kim Cattrall as she appeared today on set filming Breakin’ 2:  Electric Boogaloo  Sex and the City 2.

 Honestly, she looks like pre-eleventh grade summer school teacher, but whatever.  Apparently this look is now known as “vintage” or “retro”.

Pictures are being released on a near-daily basis from the Sex And The City 2 set — I’ll only torture you with them on the slow news days.  It’s so funny to see all the media outlets trying to piece together what the plot could be based on a few still images.  Um, howsabout we just wait to see what it’s about when it comes out in the theater?  I know, I know.  SATC has a rabid fan base.

The fashion looks pretty terrific in the scenes shot today and if you look closely you can see Cynthia Nixon’s real-life love Christine Mariononi in one of the pictures with Kristin Davis.

Sarah Jessica Parker, Chris Noth, Cynthia Nixon and Kim Cattrall are all back in their comfort zone: New York City. This time it’s for the filming of Sex and the City: The Movie 2 or whatever the hell they’re calling this thing. While we showed you a preview of Carrie’s completely horrific 80s Flashdance flashback style, I’m am happy to say that the style is not going to dominate the film. In fact, I rather like the purple dress and red bag combo that you can check out Carrie rocking in the gallery. We have yet to see any shots of Kristen Davis, but what we have so far is a great start…

Sex and the City star Willie Garson is in the process of finalizing the adoption of his 8-year old son, Nathan. Garson had attended an Adoption Fair with the intention of adopting a toddler, but knew as soon as he met Nathan that he was his son.

“It’s like a pet fair – as horrifying as you can imagine,” he recalls. “It was really hard. The 16-year-old fat, ugly kid, who has probably been to 30 of these, knows he’s not going to get adopted. Like everything, cute wins.”

To that end, Willie was shocked that his son was still in the system. “I couldn’t believe my kid was actually available for adoption,” says the doting dad. “He’s so cute and sweet.”

Willie makes sure that Nathan’s biological mother has a relationship with the boy. “For many reasons, she couldn’t care for him,” he explains, “but I will never let her not see him.”

Willie will take Nathan with him when he relocates to New York later this year to begin filming Sex and the City 2. The relocation might be a bit of an adjustment for Nathan. Apparently the two are able to lead a fairly quiet existence in L.A., but the entire Sex and the City cast “can’t walk 20 feet without being mobbed” in New York City.

Haven’t you just been longing for the next installment?  Because there are so many relevant, untold stories to the SATC saga.  Sigh.  I know money is a drug but there comes a time when you need to let a good thing die.

Even though the first one just wrapped filming, it sounds like they’re already considering doing a follow-up.

“They are exercising the sequel option in all of the stars’ contracts,” says a source. “They want it to be a franchise and think they can stretch it over at least three movies.”

I’m not going to get excited about this until I get to see the first one and make sure it doesn’t suck.

Oh, who am I kidding?

Hell, I saw all the Star Wars movies just because I felt like it was my civil duty as an American. I’d totally see all three Sex and the City movies!

You can’t exactly film one of the decade’s most-anticipated movies (with a most recognizable cast) on the streets of New York City and not expect every minute of it to be photographed.

We’ve got more pics from the Sex and the City movie filming, this time of all the girls.

If you haven’t seen the pics of Carrie and Mr. Big making out, you can check them out here.