Lindsay rung in 2009 — where else? — in a DJ booth with girlfriend Samantha Ronson as the two gazed adoringly at each other. SamRo was spinning at Mansion in Miami Beach. Will 2009 be the year they officially come out as a couple? Eh, who am I kidding? 2009 will be there year Lindsay goes through a messy break-up, gets a DUI and goes to rehab, just like every year before it.

Image via WENN

Where are you going to be ringing in 2009?  I’m happy to tell you that I’ll be snowed in on a gluten-free bread bender.  But people who actually have lives have some big plans.  Check it out:

Jennifer Anistonis in Los Cabos with John Mayer, Courteney Cox and David Arquette.  Well, John Mayer is staying at a villa located in close proximity to where Jen is staying with the Arquettes.  He totally strikes me like one of those “We don’t need a title” types.  Bleah.

Lindsay Lohan is hanging out with Samantha Ronson at her deejaying gig at Mansion in South Beach.  Sam is feeling more rested since last week’s hospitalization now that she stopped eating at airport kiosks.

Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz are hosting a party at PURE Nightclub in Vegas.  Technically, she’s Ashlee Simpson-Wentz but I’m preparing for the future when she drops him and the hyphename.

A longer list of New Year’s Eve celeb whereabouts is here and please, Denise Richards made this list?  Like one person in the universe was wondering what she was up to tonight.

Oh, and I just tried the bread and I gotta tell you:  Gluten-free bread is so disgusting.

Lindsers looks fantastic like always (these days!), smoking a cigarette with SamRo outside of Neiman Marcus after a long, hard day of shopping. Hey, at least something in her life is long and hard these days! (Ba-dum-bum ching! Honestly people if I were getting laid AT ALL I wouldn’t have to make these jokes.)

I continue to obsess upon her boots, and would like to say thank you to the commenter who told me where to find the knock-off versions of the boots she was wearing here. I received them in the mail today, and they are fucking amazing and when I wear them I feel like a movie star. Seriously I try not to spend too much time thinking about the things I would be willing to do in exchange for Lindsay Lohan’s boot collection. It’s not good for my self-esteem.

Image via WENN

Life & Style is reporting that a doctor rushed to the home of Samantha Ronson yesterday and X17 is reporting that she was rushed to the hospital today.  Who knows which is true but my money is on X17.  Either way, Sam is suffering from the most widespread illness in Hollywood:  Exhaustion and stress.  

According to a source, “She’s been suffering from depression and from lack of food and sleep,” and that Lindsay “has been helping her through this as she has been through it herself two years ago.”

I’ve been exhausted and stressed and depressed for nine years straight.  I never knew this was something that warranted medical attention.  I really need to be rich and famous so I can go get some rest too.

Their hair extensions fall out!

It gives me a tiny bit of joy to know that, despite having 8 million people to tend to her hair at all times, Lindsay Lohan still occasionally loses an extension.

Here she is with SamRo leaving Bardot in WeHo last night.

Image via WENN

Lindsay and Sam land at LAX after a quick trip to Miami, where Samantha Ronson DJ’d and Lindsay Lohan … um … drank fruit juice.

You guys, I need help. I know I’m supposed to make fun of Lindsay’s ridiculously long extensions, but I’m actually really jealous of them. I’d get the same damn things if I had a team of stylists at all times to make sure they looked that good. But extensions that long would just be a gigantic pain in the ass to take care of yourself. Still. Every time I see her I’m like, “Fuck, I want that girl’s extensions.”

Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson were spotted today at LAX.  Seriously, I want my celebs shiny, showered and dressed.  This greasy hair, black legging, spotty tanner, leather coat and hoodie thing has gone on far too long Linds.  It’s time to embrace some soap and a new look; because your leggings are becoming the striped shorts of Richard Simmon’s world.  Some call it a trademark, I call it a tragesty.

Samantha, on the other hand, is basically in black tie-aka not wearing a concert tee.