This dude is such a crackpot. Throw him in jail with Joe Francis and let them pop Ambien and poke around each other’s asses all day. Watch me give a fuck. Oh no wait except I won’t.

Four days after the pop star was granted a temporary restraining order against former manager turned meltdown-enabler Lutfi and onetime paparazzo paramour Adnan Ghalib, Lutfi has filed suit against Spears and her parents for allegedly damaging his rep.

While Britney, Jamie and Lynne Spears are all named in the suit, Lutfi claims it was the Spears parents who “began a campaign of slander, libel and defamation aimed at discrediting, destroying and physically and emotionally intimidating Lutfi in order to drive him out of Britney’s life.”

As for the singer herself, Lutfi accuses her of breach of contract and claims she still owes him unpaid management fees for her time under his pill-mashing thumb.

Last Friday, Spears’ conservatorship was granted an order barring Lutfi and Ghalib from having any contact with the singer.

Heh. “Pill-mashing thumb.”

Seriously I am thisclose to a Sam Lutfi ban around here, because I don’t want to help this dude keep his brand of crazy in the spotlight. I’m just worried that a Sam Lutfi ban will make Britney coverage difficult, and I LOVE BRITNEY, but this dude is a douchetard and I hate writing about him.

New legal documents that were just released, tell the rest of what went down.  Sam and Adnan hired a lawyer to contact Britney directly to offer to help her get her kids back.  Oh, in exchange for being the conservators of her estate:

You may not be aware of the fact that your civil rights were violated.

I have developed a legal strategy for you that I am confident will turn everything around, and ultimately garner you full custody of your children within approximately 30 to 60 days.

They will not be happy until they have denied you your freedom and milked you for your last dime. The custody case, as you know, is nothing more than a flat out extortion scheme, with your children being used as pawns.

Your case will continue to spiral until they have denied you your freedom, your children and your assets.

All I want is to see you win. I do not want anything in return and am willing to volunteer my time with you to see to it that you are successful in this custody case. I am not interested in publicity, money, or anything other than seeing you obtain full custody of your children.

Please recognize that aside from some anxiety and depression, which are totally normal under these circumstances, there is nothing wrong with you, but that the court system routinely engages in character assassination to conceal its internal bias and to break you down.

What they ultimately want is to get you into a conservatorship; at that point, your freedom will be denied, giving them the full opportunity to steal all of your money and to deny you any access to your children.

A hearing regarding the orders is scheduled for February 23rd.  Ghalib was served and Lufti, in hiding, has not been served yet.

Like an STD, it’s amazing how long a mistake can haunt you.

Thank goodness for that!

Sam “Evil” Lutfi has agreed to stay away from Brit for another month per the terms of a temporary restraining order currently in place against him, which means the Spears family doesn’t have to go to court on Monday to get the restraining order extended.

The issue will be addressed again in another month.

Let’s keep this asswipe away from our Britney FOREVER!

“Sam told [my friend] and me that he grinds up Britney’s pills, which were on the counter and included Risperdol and Seroquel. He told us that he puts them in her food and that that was the reason she had been quiet for the last three days. She had been sleeping. He told us that the doctor who is treating her now is trying to get her into a sleep-induced coma so that they could give her drugs to heal her brain.”

Lynne Spears, in her restraining order against Sam Lutfi.

This move follows reports that the situation at Britney’s Beverly Hills home devolved last night as Britney’s parents argued with Sam, Britney’s sometime manager, over her well-being.

Hooray for the (possible) end of Sam Lutfi!

Now if we can just get Adnan out of the picture.

Late Monday night, LAPD officers reported to Britney’s gated community, where photographers had apparently breached security. Brit was outside the gate, barefoot, in a screaming match with Sam Lutfi.

Brit later returned home, where her mother and father both arrived to speak with her. She then left the house in an SUV, headed towards Beverly Hills, with another photographer, believed to be Adnan’s pal Filipe Teixeira. (We have those pics here.)

Britney later jumped out of the SUV and into Adnan Ghalib’s car. I guess they’re back on.

Then, to top things off, Brit and Adnan got a flat tire, so they used to down time to smoke cigarettes in the car.

According to a statement from Adnan’s photo agency:

“The truth is that Sam Lutfi started an argument with Britney and the two ended up in a screaming fight. Sam continued to verbally abuse Britney as she sat barefoot on the curb at her Summit home crying holding her dog London. Britney called Adnan for help and he heard the distress in her voice and drove to the Summit immediately. While outside the gates he was denied access as Sam Lutfi had informed the guards that he was not allowed entry. When Adnan then tried to call Britney it seems that Sam had turned all of her cell phones off.”

Oh, Britney. I don’t even know what to say any more.

It’s her first red carpet event in YEARS!

And she chose … the Scandinavian Mansion of Style?

Whatever.

It’s just good to see her smiling, doped-up face on WireImage again.

And she and Paris seem to be getting along fabulously again.