I suppose this was just a matter of time. The kids over at DoSomething.org have released a video re-enactment of the violence that took place between Chris Brown and Rihanna on that fateful Grammy eve, based on the detective’s notes. To be fair, it’s nowhere near as cheesy as it could have been.

To help raise awareness about teen dating abuse, DoSomething is giving away a free set of three bracelets — one blue, two black, to demonstrate that one in three teens is the victim of dating violence. You can order yours here.

And while I certainly commend anyone for doing anything to speak out against domestic violence, the most powerful action you can take here is to end a relationship the very first time your significant other shows signs of violence or emotional abuse. Don’t put up with that shit, not ever. You’re worth more than that.

I’ve been waiting for this story to surface.  Chris Brown and Rihanna have decided to take a break in hopes of getting their minds clear.  I call total bullshit on this.  This isn’t a break, this is called, “Oh shit, if we ever hope to sell another album we better do something,” PR spin.

It explains why they are far apart from each other right now.  Brown is in L.A. working on his music and Rihanna has been in New York visiting friends and being photographed looking completely healthy and fine.

Now, let me tell you how this will unfold:  To the public, they will remain apart and on opposite coasts for a period of time.  When the media attention dies down, they will “reunite” and release a statement interspersed with words like “growth” and “maturity” and “respect” and “healthy.”   Rihanna and Chris will indicate their commitment, not just to each other but to their respective anger management counseling sessions.

Cynical?  Perhaps.  The good news is that nothing would thrill me more than to be wrong regarding this “break” being nothing more than an engineered scam.  Let’s hope these two stay far away from one another for life.

This story comes from The Sun, so normally I’d just laugh and move on.  But a couple things caught my attention about this item.  Firstly, it wasn’t a story about Amy Winehouse, Jade Goody or Kerry Katona…this is huge and unheard of for The Sun.  Secondly, I totally could see this being true.  It just makes sense.

The Sun is reporting that Chris Brown’s lawyers have requested a special hearing to be held next week, in which they will ask that all charges be dropped against Brown.  They claim that this was a two-way, long-since resolved lover’s quarrel.

I don’t know how to break this to The Sun or Mark Geragos, but I don’t think felony charges are dropped when the participants kiss and make up.  They do tend to get dropped when a celebrity is involved, however.

My daughter isn’t feeling well today, so she’s curled up next to me as I attempt to get some work done.  She asked me what I was writing about so I told her.  “Today, I’m writing about how it’s never okay to hit another person.”  She thought about that for a moment and said, “That’s right.  Only hugging, no hitting.  And we shouldn’t spit in each other’s faces or bite each other either.  If people do that, they should have their magic powers taken away from them.”  Attention Chris Brown:  I have a four-year-old I’d like you to meet.

Well look who’s showing her face in public again.

Miz Rihanna was looking absolutely stunning as she left Da Silvano restaurant in Manhattan on Saturday night. She’s all dolled up and obviously expecting the cameras.

Rihanna, if you want to keep that gorgeous face of yours, you need to keep your distance from Chris Brown!!! One of these days he’s gonna break bones, girl!

You have GOT to be kidding me.

Producer Polow Da Don said Rihanna and Chris Brown completed a duet earlier this week, but released no other details, said his publicist Laura Wright. “My heart goes out to both Chris and Rihanna for what has happened in the past,” he said. “They are both great artists to work with, and I wish them well.”

I hate that they’re going to get away with this. He’s gonna plead out easy on this court case, since Rihanna won’t testify. They’re gonna have these two release a duet about being so in love like he didn’t kick her ass a few weeks ago. And then everyone’s gonna get so wrapped up in this stupid song that they’re going to forget that he kicked her ass a few weeks ago. And then teenagers (and adults!) everywhere are going to be all like, “Well, I guess it’s occasionally okay when a man beats up his girlfriend. Depends on the circumstances, probably.” And then everything’s just going to be hunky dory until he kills her.

Awesome.

I had dinner with a friend last night, and she was like, “Okay, if you’re the publicist for Rihanna or Chris Brown, how do you go about re-introducing them as a couple? After everything that happened?”

I was like, “Ya know, you do it slowly. You send them both out in public separately, probably to a club. Show them acting normal with friends. Then you have them both release singles about nothing romantic — just poppy songs about partying and drinking and dancing. Get the public used to them again as individuals, so they can forget who they’ve become as a couple.”

And it’s beginning, with Rihanna hitting up hotspot Coco de Ville for a belated 21st birthday celebration last night.

Starting around midnight, the “Disturbia” singer was joined by friends, including Bromance bros Frankie Delgado and Taylor Mosher, on their own private patio. She blew out birthday candles atop pink cupcakes and washed down the treats with complimentary champagne.

A source tells E! News that the starlet “looked good, was smiling and laughing in good spirits upon leaving.”

She wore sunglasses as she departed the club around 4 a.m. in a red pickup truck. The source claims her caravan, including the truck, a black SUV and another car, were only followed by a few of the “35-plus paparazzi outside.”

Anyone wanna take bets on how long it’ll be before she and Chris start showing up at events together?

As you all know, the big fight that exploded between Rihanna and Chris Brown was over a text message.  Chris was texting with another woman about hooking up.  Now, we know who the other woman is-and it’s kind of creepy.

According to TMZ, the other half of the texting duo is forty-year-old Tina Davis, Chris Brown’s manager.  There have been rumors that she and Chris had a relationship three years ago when he was sixteen.  Thinking back to the one sixteen-year-old I’ve ever had sex with, why would anyone voluntarily sign up for that shit in their late thirties?

This video is a couple of years old; I originally put it up so we could see this chick in action.  When I watched it, and I really had no intention of watching seven minutes of this former Def Jam A&R exec, I was kind of cracking up.  It’s so funny how it the video shows her trying to be all high-powered with her “This track is too west coast, annoying.  Rewrite!” juxtaposed with footage of her painting her fingernails like a stereotypical ditzy 1950’s secretary.