OMG.

So many jokes, so little time.

This would be such a sweet and wonderful thing if their last names were anything but what they are.

Comedian and actor Jay Mohr filed a petition a week ago to legally add his wife’s surname to his own, thereby making his full appellation Jon (his birth name) Ferguson Cox Mohr. Jay married actress Nikki Cox two years ago.

I’d be snarkier about this, but right now I’m just terribly relieved for any two people who are in love and both aging in the same direction.

Nikki Cox went to the plastic surgeon and was like, “I’d like Restylane injections,” and the surgeon was like, “Okay, fine. How many vials would you like injected?” And Nikki was like, “Vials? Let’s talk gallons, baby.”

Seriously Nikki Cox’s doctor is borrowing oil barrels from the U.S. government to transport the Restylane for Nikki’s lips. That’s why it’s so damn expensive to fill up your car these days. Blame Nikki Cox.

She and Jay Mohr do look ridiculously happy, which is admittedly pretty awesome, but why would a woman with such a killer body and a beautiful face and an amazing husband feel the need to inject the goddamn Great Lakes into her lips? Look at Jay! The poor little guy can only make out with one of her lips at a time!