We weren’t really speaking of perverts, but it sounds like we are now.

Morgan Freeman and his wife Myrna split in December, 2007 after 24 years of marriage.  A new report is out that claims Morgan and his wife had an open marriage and each pursued relationships outside the marriage.  You know, I have never understood open marriages.  I think it’s fine to schtup a bunch of people if that’s what you want, but why be married?  To experience the joy of joint tax returns and time with the in-laws?  Makes.  No.  Sense.

As it turns out, Morgan was having a ten-year affair with his step-granddaughter.  To put it in perspective, this young woman named E’Dena Hines is the biological granddaughter of Morgan Freeman’s first wife, but Freeman and his second wife helped raise her.  To furtherput the situation in perspective, ten years ago — when this affair allegedly began — E’Dena was 17 and Morgan was 62.  The year he became eligible for Social Security, she worked on getting a high school diploma.

The way the National Enquirer tells it, these two are planning on getting married.  Maybe they’ll have a daughter and Morgan can fix her up with, like, Ben Vereen.

Above is a picture of the — gag — couple at the Dark Knight premiere a year ago.  This just looks like normal, grandfatherly love … not, “I Bent You Over The Sofa Last Night” love.  Right?

I guess things didn’t work out between Morgan Freeman and his mistress, with whom he was in a car accident last summer, right before he and his wife decided to get divorced.

The woman, Demaris Meyer, filed a lawsuit against Morgan in a Mississippi court today, claiming Morgan was drinking heavily the night of the car accident.

According to a lawsuit filed today in Mississippi federal court, Demaris Meyer claims on the night of the crash, she first met up with Freeman at dinner — where she noticed “throughout the course of dinner and afterward drinks were consumed by Freeman.”

Meyer then says she left dinner and met up with Freeman and others at a friend’s home. She claims Freeman “had at least one more drink” while there. She claims Freeman then invited her to stay at his home for the night — guaranteeing her not only her own bedroom, but her “own house.” She says she agreed.

Meyer claims at around 11:30 PM, while Freeman drove her to his home, Morgan lost control of the car and “ran off of the right side of the highway.” Meyer says she suffered a broken left wrist and right scapula, a torn labrum in her right shoulder and numerous bruises and lacerations.

At a press conference today, Meyer said she and Freeman were “just friends” — despite widespread rumors that she was his mistress.

Why wouldn’t she have filed this lawsuit immediately after the crash???

Oh, right, because he hadn’t dumped her ass yet …

Hip hip hooray!

Morgan Freeman was released from a Memphis medical center after being treated for the injuries sustained during a car crash this weekend.

Mr. Freeman will have to wear a neck brace for six to eight months, according to attorney Bill Luckett, who added: “The doctors have said it will be six months to a year before he plays golf again. He hates that.”

It turns out that Morgan Freeman and his wife of 24 years, costume designer Myrna Colley-Lee, have been separated since December 2007 and are currently in the process of divorcing.

Perhaps that explains why Freeman was out past his bedtime — at 11:30 pm — driving female passenger Demaris Meyer to his house. It’s been rumored that Freeman fell asleep at the wheel, causing the accident.

It’s so disappointing to see long-term Hollywood couples split up. Does marriage work for absolutely no one these days?

Hooray!

Following his car wreck this weekend, actor Morgan Freeman is doing well.

“He was walking this (morning), and is looking forward to his release as soon as possible,” said his publicist.

On Monday night, Freeman underwent four-and-a-half hours of surgery to repair damage to his left arm and hand.

We’re rooting for a full recovery for you, Morgan!

My beloved Morgan Freeman was in a serious car accident in Mississippi at 11:30 pm last night.

He was airlifted from the accident scene to a hospital in Memphis, Tennessee. Alcohol is not suspected to be involved in the accident. Of course not!!!! My precious Morgan Freeman DOES NOT drink and drive. It’s silly that we even had to say that.

There’s been no word on Morgan’s condition, but state troopers say he was talking at the scene of the accident before being airlifted.

Get better soon, Mr. Freeman!!!!

This is older news but you haven’t heard about it yet. A friend mentioned this to me and I had to track it down for you, the adoring public. I’m about to blow your mind. Ready?

Evan Almighty could cost as much as $250 million U.S. dollars to make. That’s million with an M. As in one quarter of a Billion dollars.

You may be scratching your head as to what exactly Evan Almighty is. It’s the sequel to Bruce Almighty, the one where Morgan Freeman was God and Jim Carrey put a definitive end to his comedy film career. The movie was okay, and it was cool because Jennifer Aniston played a tree. Oh, she didn’t? My bad.

But back to the budget, according to the article the film has run over on costs because:

a) it’s a “spectacle fantasy and also a comedy.”

b) the “studio’s desire to release the film during the holiday season in December, thereby cutting preparation time and forcing the crew to shoot scenes in Virginia during a rainy period.”

c) “Producers also encountered delays having to film hundreds of animals.”

Okay, now I get it. They had to deal with pricey rain, it’s a fantasy, and they had animals. It’s like Singles mixed with Jumanji so you can see why it would cost bank and a half. I won’t get into why they’ve decided special effects are relevant to a comedy because I know what really happened to the money and that’s a much more compelling story.

Tijuana hookers, eight thousand pounds of blow, and the crazy “money bonfire” party that helped the cast and crew pass away those lonely Virginia nights.