I’m inclined to agree with Cord on this one; these folks stopped caring about the plots of these things sometime in early 2002. At this point they’re just kind of like “We are so goddamn hot we could spend 2 hours reciting nursery rhymes and, as long as we’re alternating between wearing Italian suits and nothing at all, people will see this movie, so let’s make it.” Stills for Oceans 13 below.
Britney can’t figure out how to get her car to start and has to ask the paparazzi for help. [X17]
Mary-Kate Olsen’s body is now so malnourished it is unable to sustain the pigmentation in her hair. [Perez Hilton]
Matt Damon thinks the Bush twins ought to serve in Iraq. He and fellow four-star general Robert DeNiro were discussing the war for a segment of Hardball. [Glitterati]
Congratulations to Jillian Barberie! The Good Day LA host is expecting a baby. [Tabloid Whore]
Where has Jennifer Lopez been the past year? Well, aside from her inexplicable attendance at Tom Cruise’s wedding, she’s also been working on a Spanish-language album to be released early next year. Check out a sneak peak of the first single, “Que Hiciste.” [Just Jared]
Music producer J.R. Rotem, 31, fresh off his fling with Britney Spears, shows up at Koi holding hands with Hayden Panettiere, 17. [Dirty Laundry]
I’ve heard this rumor before but this is the first time someone has dared publish it online so now I’m officially concerned. The rumor is this: Matt Damon as Captain Kirk in a movie. Yikes. Matt, I pray it was just insider courtesy talk when you said:
“I heard that [rumor]. I think J.J. Abrams or somebody said that at press junket or something, and it got picked up… If the script was good, I’d do it.”
Now Matt is a fine actor, and I like the majority of films he’s been in. But you can’t go down the Captain Kirk path man. You’ll never make it back. Think of how many other movie roles Shatner has landed. Keep thinking. Okay stop, because there aren’t any. This Kirk think is bigger than us all Matt, it will eat you alive. Gone will be the cherry dramatic roles you so love, replaced with oddball camp crapola.
Come back to the light Matt. Don’t go to any galaxies that are far far away.
Fine, if you must appear in Star Trek than at least be Spock. Nimoy was hot as hell.
Reese Witherspoon and Ryan Phillippe get into a little tiff at the Flags of Our Fathers screening in NYC. Ryan claims Reese is embarrassing him, mostly because her jaw is overshadowing his career. [Cityrag]
Victoria Beckham has been offered the hosting gig on Simon Fuller’s new fashion-centric reality show. She may turn it down, since the show films in the U.S., and she knows that if she leaves hubby David’s side for more than a minute, some hottie’s going to steal him away. Like Paris Hilton. Or Tom Cruise. [Hollyscoop]
Rod Stewart thought Paris Hilton was a hot piece of ass. When she was fourteen. [Yeeah!]
Whitney officially kicks the Bobby habit. [People]
It’s not so much that Christina Aguilera’s hubby is smoking a joint, it’s that he’s wearing a bike helmet at the same time. [I'm Not Obsessed]
Catherine Zeta-Jones acts pissed that husband Michael Douglas said Eva Longoria has a great ass, as a part of their joint effort to convince the world he’s managed an erection at any point this decade. [ICYDK]
Matt Damon reaches out to African children without managing to adopt one. [PopSugar]
