Because I forget.  What is it I’m supposed to do tomorrow?  I’m fucking sick of the election and ready for November 5th.  “Vote for Change” has become the equivalent of “whassup” and “that’s hot.”  Entertaining for like two seconds and then annoying for all eternity. 

So here’s the question: Everything I read says Obama is going to win by a landslide.  Does anyone out there think McCain still has a shot? 

Jay-Z, Sean Combs (I refuse to play along with his name changes), Russell Simmons, Jesse Jackson Jr. and Mary J. Blige got together for a Last Chance for Change rally in Miami.  I think that’s the equivalent of a last chance workout on The Biggest Loser  where everyone frenetically starts doing jump tricep bench dips in hopes that it’ll make a difference at the final weigh-in.

Aw, this is a really cute story.

Last week, Blige was at the Diane von Furstenberg store in the Meatpacking District when she overheard a girl having a problem at the register. A spy said, “The girl had a dress on hold that she loved, and the bill was $900. She thought it was only $500, and she couldn’t afford it.” Blige told the saleswoman, “Go get the girl. I want to pay for the balance on the dress.” The customer at first declined Blige’s offer but relented after the singer said, “I know what it’s like to want something and not be able to have it. I insist.” The customer wanted to send her a check for the balance, but Blige said, “Just enjoy it. I’m blessed, so let me do this.”

That’s really sweet of Mary to do, but what I’m confused about is how anyone could think a $900 dress only cost $500. How do you make a mistake like that? Did the “9″ on the price tag look like a “5″? Was it accidentally on the sale rack? Wouldn’t she have confirmed the price before putting it on hold? That part seems kind of fishy to me. Maybe the “spy” just misremembered the register problem. Or maybe I need to spend less time analyzing items I read on Page Six.

But regardless, way to be a Good Samaritan, Mary!

I kid, I kid.

No one wants to see Patti LaBelle naked. I’d launch my own “I’d Rather Go Naked Than See Patti LaBelle Naked” retaliatory campaign.

It was a party for Mary J’s new album.

But man that’s a lot of dead animal.