“Rehabbed” “star” Jesse Metcalfe hits up Les Deux last night.

Clearly he’s taking the Lindsay Lohan approach to sobriety.

I heard that you were going to be a musician now. I guess I thought that meant you were going to play music. I didn’t understand that you were going to be, specifically, Eminem.

At a Malibu beach party on Saturday.

The recently rehabbed hunk was spotted leaving Parc this weekend looking a little less than sober.

The New York Post reports that Jesse spent the weekend before partying it up in Miami, where he got into all sorts of trouble.

A spy at the Shore Club saw Metcalfe poolside last Saturday afternoon chatting it up “with three married women from New York. Jesse spent the afternoon ordering drinks with the ladies . . . and then walked out on the tab.” Earlier that day, a different source told Page Six, Metcalfe and his assistant threw a fit at the Hotel Catalina in Miami Beach. “The assistant went right up to the reception desk and said, ‘Let me see Jesse’s room before I decide if Jesse is going to stay in this [bleep]ing hotel,’ ” claims an eyewitness who was in the lobby. “Everyone was staring.” Metcalfe and an entourage of “blond girls” were spotted at the nightclub Suite on Saturday, and he continued his partying Tuesday at Blue in the Delano.

Sigh. A few months ago we were saying that rehab is the new black. Now I’m gonna go ahead and say that relapse is the new rehab.

[photo credit: Buzz Foto]