Jennifer Aniston chose an unfortunate fabric to wear to the premiere of Management at the Toronto Film Festival on Sunday, and you can see her little nipple covering in a bunch of the red carpet photos.

Here’s my line of thinking: this thing obviously isn’t there to prevent the nipple from showing up in photos, or they would have made the damn thing black, right? And it’s not there to provide lifting or separating for her tits, because it’s totally not doing that, right? So it must be there to prevent her from having that infamous Jennifer Aniston THO. Jen, baby, you gotta work the hard nipples, not keep ‘em down. Own ‘em, baby! Haven’t you heard? Brad Pitt’s in town, too! Now’s your big chance! Show him what he’s missing, girl!

Heh.

I’m kidding. The Jennifer-Aniston-Fails-at-Relationships jokes will never get old for me. Mostly because they make me feel better about myself.

These are actually pics from her shooting her guest appearance on 30 Rock in NYC.

Killer stems, girl.

Okay, okay, this is really old, but it just came across my inbox and I had to share it. I’d never seen it before.

It’s Matthew Perry and Jennifer Aniston, many, many years ago, in a training video for Windows 95.

Yes, it’s every bit as painful as it sounds. And you wonder how much they got paid to do this.

But is it more painful than buckling down and finishing those expense reports you’re supposed to be working on?

Only you can make that decision, dear readers.

Part II is after the jump.

Thanks Marc!

(more…)

After all the rumors about how he’d cheated on Jennifer Aniston left and right, I guess John Mayer wanted to set the record straight. He chatted with reporters after a workout this weekend, saying that “there’s no lying, there’s no cheating, there’s no nothing … Jennifer Aniston is the smartest, most sophisticated person I think I have ever met.”

He went on to say that “People are different, people have different chemistry. I ended a relationship to be alone, because I don’t want to waste somebody’s time if something’s not right.”

Eh, we all know that’s bullshit. He and Jen broke up because Jessica Simpson sent one too many death threats.

So far, no comment from Jen’s camp.

Rumors has it that Jennifer Aniston’s new man is none other than Matt Felker — the guy from the “Toxic” video, and also Selma Blair’s ex. What is it with Jen and male models?

Also, sources are reporting that Jen dumped John — after the third time he’d cheated on her.

Apparently, Aniston gave Mayer a “three strikes and you’re out” ultimatum — after learning about his “quickie” flings with a cocktail waitress and a promoter’s assistant for his concert tour.

That was two strikes. Another dalliance, with a groupie, was the final straw for Aniston.

Uh, dude?

This is so fucked up.

What the hell are you saying about yourself when you tell your boyfriend, “Sure, you can cheat on me, but only twice.”

I mean, I doubt this is true, but if it is?

So stupid.

Dude, so how long did it take for this “serious relationship” to fall to pieces? A month? Two?

Sources are reporting that John dumped Jen.

“There’s been a bit of tension for some time,” says a source close to 30-year-old John. “They initially opted for a break, hoping a trial split might make them stronger. Sadly it doesn’t seem to have worked. John took the decision to end things as he felt he just wasn’t ready for the level of commitment that Jennifer deserved.”

Word is that Jen’s already got a new man — some sort of male model. Sigh. Isn’t she bored of the male models yet?

Miley Cyrus shows off her moves during a performance on Good Morning America.

Meanwhile, rumor is that Jennifer Aniston has approached Miley to team up on a movie.

Jen told a friend that she wants to play an overbearing stage mother to Miley’s rising singing star character.

“I approached Miley about it, and she thinks it’s a very cool idea,” she reportedly said.

She and Miley have had several chats about the film, and she’s already hiring someone to start writing the script, according to reports.

I’m not sure I buy any of this. Does Jennifer Aniston really want to admit she looks like she could be the mother of a 15-year-old?

I doubt it.

This is a fun little item from Page Six:

JOHN Mayer might have broken Minka Kelly’s heart when he left her for Jennifer Aniston - but he had the decency to call her before the news about them hit the press. A Kelly pal said, “Minka [above] received a call from John prior to the story breaking about his relationship with Jennifer. He apologized to Minka, ‘Sorry, but I’m really in love.’ ” She found that interesting as, “during his relationship with her, John mentioned, ‘I don’t really get this Jennifer Aniston thing.’ ” Mayer’s rep declined to comment.

Well, I’ll tell ya, John Mayer’s getting plenty of Jennifer Aniston’s thing these days.

He’s gonna get bored of her so quick.