For the millions of you out there who follow Ashley Tisdale’s love life with bated breath, you’ll be fascinated to know that she’s officially split from her boyfriend, Jared Murillo. Jared’s a part of a boy band called V Factory, which hasn’t exactly taken off the way they’d hoped, but you can listen to their music here. Trust me, you liked it better when it was called *NSYNC. (God, remember *NSYNC? Was that this decade?) Seriously that site should have a warning like, “Be advised: This content is not suitable for persons over the age of 12.” Where is the government when you need them???

Jared and Ashley met when he was a backup dancer on HSM. When will these girls learn? Also, they should have used whatever they took out of Ashley’s nose to fill this guy’s upper lip.

Ashley and her new nose showed up to a taping of America’s Best Dance Crew, and she was looking awfully cozy with Jared Murillo, who’s apparently her boyfriend. He’s also … drum roll please … a back-up dancer!

It’s only a matter of time before Ashley marries this dude, pops out some kids, he records a rap album and before you know it she’s pounding umbrellas into paparazzi SUVs. I know how these things work.

I guess Jared just signed a contract with Warner Bros to be a part of a new boy band called V Factory.

V Factory?

What does the “V” stand for?