It’s confirmed.

Jamie-Lynn Spears, 16, sister of Britney Spears, is motherfucking pregnant.

The baby daddy is her live-in boyfriend, Casey Aldridge, age 19.

This oughtta be fun.

And what does Nickelodeon think of this?

They’re shitting their damn pants.

But what they’re saying on the record?

“We respect Jamie Lynn’s decision to take responsibility in this sensitive and personal situation. We know this is a very difficult time for her and her family, and our primary concern right now is for Jamie Lynn’s well being.”

OMG OMG OMG.

MERRY CHRISTMAS, KIDS!!!

At least, according to OK! magazine she is.

Their new cover announces that Jamie-Lynn and her mom are going on the record about the 16-year-old’s pregnancy.

OMG!

Was she tired of her sister getting all the attention for being crazy???

What is wrong with this family?

They need to start putting birth control and Lexapro in the water in their household.

This is INSANITY!

We’ll have more details as they come.

So this is pretty great.

With Lil’ Sis Jamie-Lynn in tow, Britney headed out to the Beverly Glen Center, one of her favorite places to rendezvous with the paparazzi. A local resident decides to give Britney a piece of her mind, screaming at her that “nobody wants you in this neighborhood.”

Brit Brit keeps quiet, but the paparazzi all scream at the woman in unison. Then Jamie-Lynn gives her a piece of her (foul-mouthed) mind.

Alli Sims never would have done that. Team Jamie-Lynn!!!

Jamie-Lynn Spears hits up the Teen Vogue Young Hollywood party in LA.

“Seriously, you guys, this dress is so cool after you eat these mushrooms Britney gave me.”

Fine, Jamie-Lynn, but how are we supposed to make sense of your hair?

Everyone seemed to be in a genuinely good mood on Sunday at the Disney-sponsored event to support the Elizabeth Glaser Pediatric AIDS Foundation in Westwood.

Jamie-Lynn Spears was there with an unidentified guest (a boyfriend, maybe? Anyone know who this Abercrombied hottie is?), and, boy, she must just be really happy that it’s not her sister in jail right now. A very pregnant Bridget Moynahan was goofing around with an adorable Molly Sims. Lauren Conrad showed up with Audrina Patridge (not surprisingly, there was no Heidi Montag in sight). Carmen Electra showed up, as did ex-hubby Dave Navarro (wearing the most adorable little shirt — I’m pretty sure I got the same one at Banana Republic a few seasons ago). Brooke Burke even brought a cowboy hat. And, of course, my darling Ashley Tisdale, once again investing her time and energy in charity rather than partying.

While most of the world took it for granted that K-Fed was cheating on Britney during their marriage, new rumors suggest that Brit-Brit may have been getting some on the side, too. Her alleged paramour is J.R. Rotem, who Britney definitely hooked up with after filing for divorce. Other sources say J.R. had a previous fling with none other than Paris Hilton, Britney’s BFF of five minutes earlier this month, and that when Britney found out she put an end to their BFF-ship. However, Miss Hilton recently gifted Britney a $500 doggie carrying case, so these rumors may be unfounded.

In Touch Weekly reports that Britney actually called K-Fed to ask him if he’d seen the pictures of her making out with Rotem, and to brag about all the sex she was having. Kevin was furious and started screaming at her.

And, making yet another stop on her self-styled image rehabilitation tour, Britney stopped at a tattoo parlor in L.A. with her little sister to get a hand tattoo.

For real, though, she is totally fine. She has never been happier. This is all so. Much. Fun. Ain’t that right, Britney?

Not much today, kids. Not much at all.

• Gawker’s backstage reporting from the VMAs is worth a read.
• Remember when Ben Affleck was cool? And when he was in a movie, people wanted to see it? Yeah. Not so much now.
• You know how you can tell it’s a really slow news day? Pictures of Jamie-Lynn Spears.
• Ashlee Simpson may or may not be dating Pete Wentz. “Who is Pete Wentz?” exclaims America.
• Pre-VMA report from Page Six: Ryan Seacreast hanging with his gays; Jason Wahler makes Lauren Conrad cry; Brandon Davis may (shhhh) be on drugs.