They just got engaged in July after Ivanka’s conversion to Judaism, and now Ivanka Trump is the proud and happy wife of Jared Kushner.

Trump married her super-rich guy (he owns the New York Observer) Sunday at Trump National Golf Club in New Jersey.  As an aside, I was reading up on the Kushner family this morning.  The groom’s father, Charles, was released from jail in August 2006 after serving less than two years for tax evasion and intimidating witnesses.  One of those FBI witnesses was his sister’s husband.  Charles hired a prostitute to seduce his brother-in-law.  He videotaped the whole event and sent the tape to his sister.  Nice. Guy.

Anyway, the fete was your basic low-key  Trump affair with a Vera Wang dress, 500 guests, Regis Philbin singing and though it hasn’t been reported as such, let’s assume Ivana was there with a 24 year old on her arm.  Good luck, kids!  Hope you both signed a serious prenup.

Ivanka Trump is officially a dirty Jew. She converted to the religion in order for boy-toy Jared Kushner’s family to allow them to get engaged.

“Jared is my best friend for many reasons,” the heiress said. “I’ve allowed him to see who I truly am and he still loves me. I don’t feel like I have any defensive walls built up around me … He’s a bit of a hero of mine. His ability to remain focused – he lacks an anxiety that’s natural for someone his age handed so much responsibility.”

You can kinda-sorta get a look at Ivanka’s bling in these photos from the Whitney Museum’s party on Friday, and then I stole this close-up from People. Um … not too shabby, ‘vanks! MAZEL TOV! Now that you’re Jewish, how’s about a little Tzedakah? I’ll settle for 10% of your net wealth. It’ll please our God, I promise. And I’ve been negotiating with him for a lot longer than you.

Did I ever tell you guys about the time I wore Ivanka Trump’s tank top? So my parents shipped me off every summer to this “camp” outside of Boston — there was nothing “camp” about it, though. We slept in fancy dorms and ate fancy foods and occasionally were compelled to attend “activities,” but basically we just had a ton of free time to wander around and get high and engage in various sexual activities with one another. Needless to say, the camp attracted a lot of kids from NYC’s Upper East Side, and one of them was a close friend of Ivanka Trump. I grabbed a white tank top out of her closet one day because I liked it, and she saw me wearing it in the hall and she was like, “Um, you’re wearing Ivanka Trump’s tank top.” And I was like “What?” And she was like, “Yeah, I stole that from Ivanka and took it here and now you’re wearing it.” Somewhere, I have a picture of a very skinny, strung-out, black-eyelinered me wearing Ivanka Trump’s tank top. Ah, childhood.

Ever since then, I’ve felt a kinship with Ivanka. We shared a tank top, after all. So I’m delighted to hear that she’s maybe kinda-sorta marrying Jared Kushner, fellow heir and NYC wunderkind. Why the maybe-kinda-sorta? Because Ivanka’s not a member of the tribe, and Jared’s mother will not have her son marrying a non-Jew. (He even broke up with her for a little while because she was so upset about it.) But Ivanka’s working on the Jew thing.

“I am studying,” she said of her conversion to Judaism. She’s studying with Rabbi Haskel Lookstein at Congregation Kehilath Jeshurun. “It’s been an amazing and fulfilling experience for me … One of the jokes I first started making when Jared and I first started dating is, I’m a New Yorker, I’m in real estate. I’m as close to Jewish, with an ‘i-s-h’ naturally as anyone can start off.”

Ha. Maybe she ought to talk to Charlotte York. It worked out so well for her.

Ivanka’s friends are confirming that she’s split from her beau of one year, real estate heir/wunderkind Jared Kushner.

“It was mutual,” said a friend. “It’s a sad thing.”

Now Ivanka can get back to the business of pretending to run a department at Trump. And women can get back to not at all wanting to be her. And men can get back to thinking about how she does have great tits and they might be attracted to her if she weren’t so business-like and driven and intimidating.

Here’s Ivanka Trump, hosting some sort of golf thing for women in NYC.

I love how, most of the time, she’s holding the golf club as though she might break into song and dance with it, like Gene Kelly with an umbrella. Oh, if only the skies could open up and rain golf balls on her head.

This girl doesn’t know a thing about golf. Looking great in heels, though? She’s got that part down.

Ivanka Trump and Melania Knauss squint angrily at the camera at a Malawi benefit in NYC.

Seriously, what is up with this?

Does Melania have eye damage? Is it contagious?

Also, I want to go to sleep in Ivanka Trump’s breasts.

I know I said I’d moved on after this picture surfaced, but, dammit, when I read about him running around town with Ivanka Freakin’ Trump, that little green monster just comes right out. Look, I may not want him anymore, but you certainly can’t have him, Ivanka.

FORGETFULNESS got Ivanka Trump off the hook Friday night, when the exhausted heiress was coaxed by friends to hit East Village staple Black & White – but wasn’t let in because she didn’t have her ID. “She had Adam Duritz in tow, they were all at a birthday party together,” said our spy. When the Counting Crows frontman couldn’t convince the bouncer to let her in, Trump gratefully went home. She told Page Six she was glad for the excuse: “It was fine. I had no particular interest in going anyway.”

That’s right, ‘Vanki. Go on home.

Mine. Mine. Mine. Mine. Mine.

We’ve known forever that the original Mrs. Trump was going to get engaged to her longtime boyfriend, Rossano Rubicondi, but the two formally announced it on Monday night.

See, this is the way to live. I want the freaking AP photo service to be there when I announce my engagement. Because then I will know I am important.

Her kids, Donald Jr. and Ivanka, were there to celebrate with her. No sign of The Donald.

Plus, check out my tits!

The Trump with Tits showed off her new (super boring) jewelry line at the Taj Mahal on Thursday night.

I just love the knee-length skirt with the barely-there top. That outfit is so not flattering on her.

Here’s Ivanka Trump, celebrating her cover of Stuff magazine, the poor man’s alternative to Maxim. She’s on the cover of the fall fashion issue. The event was held at Trump Tower, and Donald was there with her on the carpet, as he’s certainly not one to pass up an opportunity to use his daughter’s sex appeal to further his own fame.

This is nice and all, but I love that this is happening as Stuff magazine is probably folding. From the Hollywood Reporter:

The future owners of Dennis Publishing’s men’s titles plan to fold Stuff as a standalone magazine in the fall and make it a section in flagship Maxim, sources told Mediaweek. No word on the fate of Stuff’s staffers.

The news hardly comes as a shock; it was widely expected Stuff would take a different form after it was sold, along with Dennis Publishing’s other U.S. men’s titles, to private equity firm Quadrangle Group, in a $240-plus million deal. Alpha Media Group, the new name for Dennis Publishing’s men’s titles, is expected to close on the deal as early as next week.

Dennis launched Stuff as a smaller-circ, shopping-focused title, to block Emap’s FHM from gaining ground on Maxim by offering advertisers a lower-cost alternative to Maxim. But Stuff has teetered between the red and black, and FHM folded late last year, leading some to question Stuff’s reason for being.

First you killed The Apprentice, Ivanka, and now Stuff magazine? What are you going to destroy next? Hm, maybe you should spend more time around Paris Hilton …

Yay! It appears Miss Kate Bosworth is continuing to eat like a normal human being, and she looks fantastic! It’s great to keep seeing pictures of her looking healthy and happy.

Kate showed up at the Whitney Museum’s Art Party on Wednesday night, along with many other celebs. Sarah Michelle Gellar and hottie hubby Freddy Prinze Jr were there, along with Rosario Dawson, ousted Top Chef host Katie Lee Joel, who may or may not be leaving her grandpa husband Billy, Ivanka Trump, and the always fabulous Holly Dunlap, the designer behind the celeb-favorite Hollywould brand (I imagine her outfit is from her latest collection).

Juggling the roles of being the daughter of Donald Trump and the very most qualified Vice President in the Trump Organization is certain to wear a girl out. Ivanka Trump deserves a little relaxation. A little sumpin’-sumpin’, if ya know what I mean, and who better to get it from than that other potent NYC hybrid of nepotism and ambition: New York Observer owner Jared Kushner, 25.

According to Gawker, the two were out bowling last night. “Every now and then they sneaked a kiss,” reports a spy. “They seemed to have been enjoying themselves until we made a big deal of them.”

Awww. How cute.