Archive for the ‘Hugh Hefner’ Category

Quotables

Thursday, January 31st, 2008

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“To be perfectly frank, I have unexpectedly fallen in love. It is the relationship with Holly that will probably last forever. The others will last for as long as they want it to last before going on with their careers and lives.”

Hugh Hefner to the AP.

Score one for Holly Madison.

You know she can’t wait until Bridget and Kendra get out of the picture and she gets to have that Hefner baby.

What The Hell Happened at Hyde Last Night?

Wednesday, May 16th, 2007

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Some really interesting pictures coming out of the WhiteTrash Charms Playboy Jewelry Launch Party at Hyde last night. Kelly Osborne hosted the event, and basically looked like a drag queen doing her very best Kelly Osbourne. Those extensions look ridiculous on her. Also, she was making out with Kim Stewart on the dance floor.

Hef and Holly were there, and Hef couldn’t keep his hands off Holly’s belly. He never touches her like that. She also looks like she’s put on a couple pounds — could Holly finally be pregnant with Hef’s fat paycheck little baby?

Also, for some strange reason, Blake Lewis was there. And it doesn’t look like he changed after AmIdol wrapped their taping. Isn’t this the outfit he was wearing on the show last night?

Oh, and Melissa Rivers was there, looking man-ish as ever, as well as newly minuted PMOY Sara Jean Underwood, looking adorable for someone who, as our commentors noticed, doesn’t have a vagina.

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Oh Captain, My Captain

Sunday, April 15th, 2007

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Hey! Someone knock that old guy over so I can bang the hooker.

What’s that? It’s Hef? Oh, man, sorry Hef – I thought you had passed away (I mean that in a totally supportive manner).

Hugh Does It Dirty

Monday, February 26th, 2007

Page 6 says Hugh Hefner is getting married again to the chickie pictured above (Holly Madison). Not only will she recieve mind altering elderly sex with a moderate chance of breakin’ a man’s hip but she’ll also get the security that comes with the Playboy Mansion’s grotto.

I can tell you that by the time I’m 80 not only will I not care about women; I’ll be in full crotchety mode (while pursuing competitive shuffleboard). Right now women are lovely. At 80, egh, I’m good.

Nice work Hugh, now don’t you go dying on us.

Late-Night Links

Wednesday, January 24th, 2007

Those folks who took over Paris Hilton’s storage locker when she forgot to pay the monthly fee on it have finally released the info they found within. Among it: pictures of Paris smoking a tampon. [Gawker]

Rose McGowan’s looking a little ragged these days. [popbytes]

Jen Aniston’s rep is just plain tired of lying. He admits his client had a nose job this weekend. [The Superficial]

Singer Brandy was the cause of a disturbing Los Angeles wreck. No, not Moesha. [Bossip]

Look, I tried, but I can’t beat Seth and Mark on this, so I’m just going to steal their headline: ABC Sends Isaiah Washington to Gayhab. [Defamer]

Clearly the most effective way to get your estranged wife to seek help for her drinking problem is to whine about it to Star magazine. Right, K-Fed? [IBBB]

Hugh Hefner takes time out of his busy day to call Kelly Osbourne ugly. [Agent Bedhead]

Late-Night Links

Wednesday, January 17th, 2007

The cast of Grey’s Anatomy continues their love-fest, with T.R. Knight appearing on Ellen to formally recommend Isaiah Washington for sainthood. [Defamer]

Even into the sixth season, the American Idol auditions continue to hold a strange power over America. Film.com’s live-blogging it. [Film.com]

Breaking: Paris Hilton treats another human being like crap for no discernable reason. [Celebslam]

Larry Rudolph shocks the world by announcing that Britney Spears is actually not pregnant. [Hollywood Grind]

Meanwhile, a definitely pregnant Tori Spelling knocks back a few glasses of wine. [DListed]

Hugh Hefner generously agrees that he will maybe possibly at some point consider allowing Holly Madison to demand child support from him once she ages out. [Celebitchy]

Gasp! Aniston confidante Courteney Cox was spotted fraternizing with the enemy at the Golden Globes. [The Blemish]

Pam Anderson parties at the Playboy mansion, narrowly avoids a crotch shot. She is not fast enough, however, to evade the ginormous Wynonna Judd lookalike who’s grabbed her by the leg and is now threatening to lick something. [TBYLTH]

Another Beauty Queen…Another Playboy Centerfold

Friday, January 12th, 2007

So not only has Miss Tara Conner been approached by Hugh Hefner and his people to be in Playboy, but also Katie Rees as well. If you don’t remember Katie Rees she was the fallen beauty queen from Nevada who posed for naughty sexually suggestive pictures during her spring break and was dethroned by Donald Trump even though he had recently given Tara Conner, Miss USA, a pardon for her slutting it up, snorting blow and boozing while underage.

I really think that Hef should create a whole special issue for beauty queens perhaps “Beauty Queens Bare All.” I really think a special issue would sell quite well. They can bring back Vanessa Williams, Aaron Carter’s fiancee for a hot second Kari Ann Peniche, and whatever other pageant cast offs that have graced their pages and add in a bunch of these Miss USA girls. They all seem a bit freaky anyway but what can you expect when the Donald owns the pageant. I bet Vanessa Manillo (a former Miss Teen USA) would be game as well.

This I think is a great idea. If anyone knows Hef please give him the memo…and let him know I love “The Girls Next Door.”

On another note separate from my amazing idea, I guess Katie was also approached by Joe Francis to host a special “Girls Gone Wild.” She turned that down but will be hosting Jeff Beacher’s “Comedy Madhouse” at the Hard Rock Hotel in Las Vegas for $10,000.

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