Remember how Heidi Klum was basically wearing eight layers of sweatshirts in these photos? And I said that I’d assume she was pregnant except for she looked relatively bump-less in photos taken a couple weeks earlier???

Well, I guess she’d just recently started to show!

Because Heidi is pregnant with her FOURTH child, and her third with hubby Seal. She’s a little under four months pregnant, according to sources.

Congrats Heidi!

On Monday, Heidi Klum and hubby Seal took their ridiculously attractive children, Leni, Henry and Johan, for a walk in Manhattan.

Heidi is wearing some very loose (and ugly!) clothing here, and a huge sweatshirt. When I first saw these pics, I was like, “Is Heidi Klum pregnant again?” I don’t think she is — based on this photo taken in LA two weeks ago:

But it’s still an odd choice of outfit, even if it is a little cold in New York. I mean, her children look plenty warm, but they’ve done so without looking homeless.

Perhaps you heard about the designer who, last week, said that Heidi Klum was “too heavy” to be a runway model.  Klum issued some dignified response.  Well Wolfgang Joop, the dude in question, is at it again.

I don’t know how Heidi crossed this guy, but I wonder if she’s regretting it now.  His newest tirade directed at the supermodel, is an in-depth critique of Klum’s features:

“She is not a top model, but an ad girl. Who in high fashion has this permanent grin? She doesn’t have a nice mouth even when she isn’t grinning.”

And Joop certainly wasn’t holding back: “She has a large frame, but small facial features. The small nose, her eyes are too close together, she has thin lips – it is all too small for her bulky body.  She has that standard look of perfection – down to the perfectly dyed hair.”

Models are a breed all their own and I never feel that a mortal like me should be analyzing them.  By Joop’s own account, he said she has “that standard look of perfection.”  Apparently, that’s a bad thing in modeling.  I dunno.

Having said that, with my bitterness bubbling to the top, I did pick this picture based solely on the fact that this may be the most unflattering pair of pants that have ever existed.  Ever.

Gossip Girl’s Michelle Trachtenberg was one of many celebs that showed last night for the 2008 Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show.  She really should have considered a pantsuit.  Or a maxi-dress.  Are those still in?  She’s got big tree trunks…what can I tell ya?  Normally I’d think that she’s probably a nice girl which completely trumps being big-kneed but in this case I don’t think her personality wins any points.  Who goes to the VS Fashion Show and can’t put on some lip plumper?  Wait-maybe she thought the tube said “leg plumper”…hmmm…

There were lots of other interesting people that were there but not together (that’s code for “formerly fucked”) like Sean Combs and Aubrey O’Day (I’m convinced they did the deed because he does like…everyone) and Brody Jenner, Paris Hilton and Kristin Cavallari. 

Every year is the same goddamn thing for this show.  Here’s the gist:  wings, feathers, boobs, $5M bra, tanner, body glitter, hard-ons, feathers, leather, Heidi Klum’s inflated sense of self-importance.  We get it Heidi; you’re head Angel.

Please make sure you look at Shakara on the pink (gag) carpet.  I’ll put her right near the top of the massive gallery.  “Who is Shakara?” you say…I don’t know.  No one knows.  A model.  And the fucking funniest wardrobe choices I’ve ever seen.  She has found a way to wear schizophrenia.

When you pose next to yourself… you’re going to come up short.

This is her promoting some new bottled water or something. I don’t know – I can’t be bothered with the facts of the matter.

Heidi Klum reminds us all that being the oldest Victoria’s Secret Angel doesn’t mean she can’t still rock some ass crack.

Looking hot, Heids.

“I met him in a hotel lobby in New York City and he came in just from the gym and I was sitting there and I was, like, wow. And I pretty much saw everything. The whole package.”

Heidi Klum, to Oprah Winfrey, about meeting husband Seal for the first time when he was wearing bicycle shorts.

See, boys? It doesn’t matter how (literally) tore-up your face is if you’re packing.