Geri Halliwell has called off her three month long engagement to billionaire Fabrizio Politi.  Why don’t these things ever endure?  I mean, if two people who get engaged fourteen days after meeting can’t make it work, what hope is there for the rest of us?

The Daily Mail reports it like this:  “But the couple’s love affair came to an abrupt halt after Geri reportedly woke up last week and realised she ‘wasn’t the marrying type.’”

Let me be clear:  The only way you just wake up one day and suddenly realize you aren’t the marrying type, is when you roll over and enjoy some afterglow with a dude that isn’t your fiance-that is a pretty good indicator.  Of course DM makes it sound like God just swooped down one fine morning and whispered in her ear, “Psst…Geri, marriage isn’t for you.”

So, Ginger can’t keep it in her pants.  She’s got a wayward snatch.  Hey, can we start calling her Ginger Twat?  It could be the 2009 version of Fire Crotch.  You know “twat” is like, my favorite word ever; It’s so versatile.

Now that Halliwell is single, she can concentrate on raising her daughter and generously spreading her legs kindness to nations in need.  She is a UN Goodwill Ambassador after all.

I know Beet is in search of her own billionaire; I remain hopeful that this story will give her renewed faith.

After an extensive fortnight of dating, Geri Halliwell is now engaged to yacht company owner Fabrizio Polit.  They met in December and got engaged during the Festive Season; or, you know, Christmas.  Ginger Spice’s management company released this statement:

We are delighted to announce the engagement of Geri Halliwell and Fabrizio Politi.  As a token of their commitment to each other, Fabrizio presented Geri with an engagement ring over the Festive Season.  There are no immediate plans for marriage as the couple are enjoying their engagement.

I love being a woman; I love that “as a token of their commitment to each other,” she got a $310,000 ring.  God, commitment is so much work.  She must have to keep her nails manicured all the time now.

Ok, here is where I get all judgemental; forgive me.  Halliwell has already displayed enough bad judgement when she named her daughter Bluebell.  As a former single mother, there is no way in hell I’d be engaged to a guy that I knew for two weeks.  When a kid is involved, the rules change.

“It probably won’t happen ever again. I’m still absolutely blown away that we did more than one show. So right now I’m thinking this is it. This is the last time you will ever get to see this Girl Power, the five Spices on stage as one.”

Geri Halliwell, to Billboard, regarding the possibility of another Spice Girls reunion.

“We should have had a recount. That’s what they do in America. They recount votes.”

Geri Halliwell claims Mel B. was robbed of the Dancing with the Stars crown, on stage at the Spice Girls L.A. concert.

“I just didn’t have the tools to work through things. I wish I’d been more mature about it instead of just running away.”

Spice Girl Geri Halliwell discusses her regret about walking out on the band the first time around.