The OC’s Rachel Bilson and Adam Brody decide to call it quits. In real life, not on the show. Are they still on that show? Do I really care? No. [Tabloid Whore]

Eddie Murphy reportedly announces to a Dutch television show that he’s no longer dating Mel B. (aka Scary Spice) and now questions the paternity of her child. His rep says these reports are false. Maybe Eddie needs to take a tip from Gwyneth Paltrow and brush up on his foreign-language skills. [TMZ]

Um…related? Eddie Murphy is dating film producer and Babyface ex Tracey Edmonds. [Bossip]

I’m Not Obsessed has a good index of YouTube clips from the VH1 Big in 06 Awards. [I'm Not Obsessed]

George Clooney’s pet pig dies. Perhaps this will send him into a drunken emotional tailspin, hitting up Hyde every night with new BFF Stavros Niarchos, culminating in a glorious George Clooney crotch shot. Is that too much to ask?? [Junkiness]

I love Jennifer Garner. After her weight gain kicked off rumors of another pregnancy, she decides to just fess up: “Nobody’s pregnant. I am as physically unfit as I’ve probably been in my whole life.” [Pop on the Pop]

Oh good. Tori Spelling’s writing a memoir. People notes that the opus will “likely be done with the help of a ghostwriter.” I would, honestly, be much more interested in the stunning work of literature that Tori Spelling would surely produce if left entirely to her own devices. [People]

Two Beckhams for the price of one Courtney Love? You’ve got yourselves a deal, England! [popbytes]

A day with Paula Abdul is not worth $26,000 to anyone. A day with her Vicodin supply? Now that’s another story. [CelebSlam]

Nicole Richie doesn’t like it when strangers text message her. [Drunken Stepfather]

Scary Spice is carrying Eddie Murphy’s love child. [Juicy-News]

Check out the video from Christina Aguilera’s new single, “Hurt,” which comes complete with a father-daughter separation scene straight out of a Michael Lohan cartoon. [Hollywood Gossip Whores]

Before they became the alcoholic, abusive, herpetic mess we all took such pure joy in watching them become, Liza Minelli and David Gest filmed a pilot for a reality show. Because God loves you, this footage has surfaced. [Perez Hilton]

Ellen Degeneres invites a hyptonist on her show for a weepy attempt to rid herself of the smoking habit, the cumulative result of which is that now I want a cigarette. [Defamer]