It’s a slow celeb news day.  To the point that one of the big items flying around today is that Rihanna drank water yesterday.  The sports bottle would neither confirm or deny.  So when it’s quiet, there is only one person to talk about:  Denise Richards.

Denise Richards looks hot.  I know she’s seventeen kinds of crazy (and feeling completely vindicated) but I think she looks great.  I’ve been reading some blogs lately that are calling her fat.  She appeared to be maintaining her robust size four frame with a 112 calorie dinner last night at Tao Nightclub’s Three Year Anniversary Celebration last night in Vegas.

Other happenings included Ellen Pompeo, as always, looking like a Mennonite and Robin Leach in perhaps the most unnatural situation I could ever envision for him.  Oh, and Mickey Rourke is the poster child for plastic surgery addiction.

Not only did she just learn that Brooke Mueller is pregnant with Charlie Sheen’s baby, but her stupid reality show, Denise Richards: It’s Complicated, just got canceled, thank the Lord.

“The numbers started out pretty good – just over 1.5 million tuned in for the premiere episode,” said a source. “But the audience has dropped off.”

It turns out it’s not complicated at all: audiences just don’t like Denise “Bad Person” Richards.

I can’t say I blame them.

After Denise Richards “leaked” some voicemail messages from Charlie Sheen, including one where he calls her the N-word (the transcript is after the jump), Sheen has released this apology:

“I deeply apologize by my choice of words to all I have obviously offended; especially to Tony Todd, an African-American, who was my best man at my first two weddings.”

Sheen added, however, that “three and one-half years later, the reasons that caused the anger and frustration displayed on that voice mail continue to be manifested on a daily basis” because “my children did not show up today for a custodial visit without explanation.”

Sheesh.

I think they both kind of suck (I’m definitely always annoyed by anyone who uses the “some of my best friends are black” defense against using racial slurs in a hateful manner, although I don’t think Charlie Sheen is racist), but I still think Denise sucks harder.

Transcript of the voicemail from Sheen is after the jump. Warning: it’s offensive.

(more…)

Here’s Denise “Bad Person” Richards at a charity event for Fertile Hope, which provides fertility resources to cancer patients.

You are not fooling anyone, Denise. You only go to these charity events because no one else wants you around.

And Denise? Bright pink lipstick went out about 20 years ago. You should donate the remainder of your collection to charity and issue a press release.

“I’m in a no-win situation. If I don’t have my children in my show, then people will say ‘Well, she’s really not a hands-on mom.’ If I do have my children, people are saying that I’m exploiting them. And I think there’s plenty of reality shows with families, where you don’t watch them — at least I never did — and think they really exploited their kids.”

Denise Richards, on why she’s exploiting her kids.

Despite Charlie Sheen’s objections, a court ruled last month that Denise Richards can use her poor young daughters as pawns on her upcoming reality TV series on E!.

Those kids hate being on camera.

“The show will give viewers an inside look at what it’s like for Denise to go through these ups and downs while always in the public eye,” said Lisa Berger, Executive Vice President, Original Programming and Series Development for E!, in a statement. “At the core of this series is a resilient single mom who is trying to get her life back on track.”

Ugh.

GO AWAY, DENISE! And keep your fucking kids out of your mess of a life.

“I’m truly not one to give advice. I’m divorced and I stole my best friend’s husband.”

- Denise Richards, when asked to give her opinion on Paris Hilton’s jail sentence.

[source]