You were quite troublesome this weekend, little guy.

[hat tip]

Okay, so remember that girl you knew in college who got the word “love” tattooed on her hip in Chinese? Except what it really said is “I’m a neutered goat”? I know you knew at least one. I knew three. Maybe you even were that girl.

So Cameron Diaz goes hiking around Machu Picchu this week with a super-cute bag with a pretty red star and some fabulous Chinese writing that I’m sure she thought said “faith and love for all.” Except the Chinese writing actually said “Serve the People,” and, combined with the red star, she may as well have stuck Mao Zedong’s face on her T-shirt.

The ringing endorsement of Red China didn’t go over so hot in Peru, where the Maoist insurgency in the 1980s and early 1990s resulted in 70,000 rather brutal deaths.

Of course Cameron didn’t do this on purpose, but it seems to have offended a fair number of Peruvians.

Seriously, people, if you need another reason not to wear any words written in a language you don’t speak, look no further than Engrish.com’s clothing section. Any of you English speakers who have lived in Asia can appreciate how ridiculous it is to see an eight-year-old boy wandering around with an ice-cream cone and a T-shirt that says “Kill me now I want to die.” I’m still kicking myself for not taking a picture of that shit …

Cameron and Justin asked to reunite so that someone mentions that God awful Shrek movie again.

JT and Cam-Cam look awfully cozy at the Shrek 3 London premiere. She may be older than you, Jess, but at least she’s not a trashy skank. I’m just saying.

These are some of the fakest smiles I’ve seen out of her in a long time. And she’s gotten damn good at faking smiles over the years. I’m sure she’s pissed that she has to fly across the world to be at this thing and no one else has to. Cam, baby, you gotta work out some sort of Keira Knightley deal next time.

Cameron Diaz loves to be the cute fun-loving tomboy. She showed up to promote her new movie, “Shrek the Third” in this fun little denim number. I actually think this little outfit is cute but she is 34. At one point don’t you start rocking something a little more age appropriate?

Perhaps she is worried to let go of her 20s but I think she seems to be trying a bit hard these days to be cool and young. You can’t dance around in your underwear forever Cameron.

What do you think of Cameron’s little ensemble?

The good news is, five minutes later, her dealer got a phone call.

He listened. Hung up. Shouted to the factory floor.

“We’re back in business boys!”

Poor Cam-Cam. Never date someone who is actively bringing sexy back. They’ll only break your heart.