Archive for the ‘Britney Spears’ Category

Muh Baby Fell In Some Horse Poo!

Tuesday, June 16th, 2009

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Britney is so well-intended.  While in London she started out by taking her sons for a walk but then got one of them stuck in a pile of horse excrement.  Pushing strollers is such hard work.  The good news?  She had her hired help with her to assist with the physical labor.

Other pics in the gallery show Brit on the same day, wearing a different shirt, as well as her son’s impressive tongue rolling skills.

Britney Spears Flashes Paps

Sunday, June 14th, 2009

Britney Spears Crotch Panty Upskirt

I cannot seem to escape articles about the vulva today. Britney Spears made the tabloid news this weekend, and once again, the pictures we have are not of a private appearance by the singer in London, but of an appearance by her privates. She can manage to cover her head with a jacket, but can’t cover up that other, more important hair?

I must have Britney’s bush fatigue because I am getting very, very tired of seeing this woman’s reproductive parts.

The “business” is in the gallery.

Britney and Her Agent: Definitely Involved!

Tuesday, June 9th, 2009

Britney Spears and Boyfriend Agent Jason Trawick Pictures Photos

We’ve been hearing rumors for awhile, and now we have even more confirmation that Britney and her agent, Jason Trawick, are an item.

“They are totally and definitely dating,” a source tells People. “Her dad loves him. He’s the best thing that happened to her.”

Actually, I think her dad is the best thing that ever happened to her. Britney would never be in a position to have a healthy relationship (that her dad approves of!) if her father hadn’t stepped in a couple years ago and put a court-mandated end to this nonsense. He made a difficult choice, and gave up his own career in the process, but I think that man absolutely saved Britney Spears’ life. I know that if I were ever in the same situation (thank God I’m not!), my Daddy would do the same, and that makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. I only wish Lindsay Lohan had someone in her life with the presence of mind to do something similar for her.

Anyhoo, congrats to Britney on a happy relationship!

Britney Spears Headed To Australia

Tuesday, June 9th, 2009

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Britney Spears is in London with her Circus tour right now but still took time out to announce that she has six dates set to perform in Australia this November.  This will be her first time touring there. 

Are the Aussies excited?  Is Brit as popular there?

See?  Not one “going down” or “going down under” joke.  That, my friends, is restraint.

Britney’s Spiral of Crazy Is Now Almost Complete

Monday, June 8th, 2009

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I give Britney Spears a lot of credit for rebounding back to some level of sanity, but I’ve always felt that something was amiss. 

I went through the checklist and realized that she’s accomplished almost everything required in order to get her Train Wreck Certification:  photographed with no underwear under her dress, passed out in a nightclub, suspected drug use and abuse, lapsed into British accents, standoff with the cops, wore a pink wig, slept with paparazzi, stayed in a mental health facility.  

So, what was missing?  Ah, yes.  Topless photos and a sex video.  Now, thanks to old still shots from the “Gimme More” video Brit is one step closer to completing the picture of crazy.  It’s time for K-Fed to break out the ol’ home videos.

Click here for topless Britney and, uh, NSFW.  Duh.

Britney Holds Auditions For New Backup Dancers

Thursday, June 4th, 2009

Britney Spears just put up video of her sons Sean and Jayden doing a little dress rehearsal during a break on her London tour.

If they are able to inherit their parent’s talent and are able to avoid the love of pink wigs, leeching off spouses and the general crazy gene, they can go so far.

Cute, right?

It’s Time for Your Monthly Update on Britney Spears’ Private Parts

Thursday, May 28th, 2009

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Wow, can this girl never go a full month without the news covering a story about something coming out of her vagina? From Page Six:

Britney Spears has cleaned up her act — but she’s still kind of a mess. The pop tart took time off from her “Circus” tour to do an Elle magazine shoot, our spy says, and it was a disaster. “They dressed her in all these beautiful couture clothes — and, well, let’s just say she forgot what time of the month it was. It wasn’t pretty.”

OMG so if you read through those adorably euphemistic lines, Britney Spears’ vagina bled all over those designer clothes. Unless by “time of month” this source meant “the time of month that Britney spontaneously pees all over designer clothes.” I have a lot of questions here. Did she know she was on her period and just not use a tampon? Did she have a tampon in and forget to change it? Or did it sneak up on her? Because sometimes that just happens.

I just kind of feel bad for Brit about all this. Like, homegirl’s done a pretty fantastic job of keeping her act together these past few months, and the media’s still so damn set on finding completely humiliating stories about her. I think you and your menstruating vagina are awesome, Britney!

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