After the huge success of Troy in 2004, Brad Pitt is teaming up once again with director George Miller to do a film adaptation of Homer’s other famous epic, The Odyssey.

However, the plan is not to pick up where Troy leaves off, the way the poems do, but rather to set The Odyssey in the future.

Interesting?

Or cheesy?

I guess we’ll find out.

Answer: Yes. I would rather see photos of Lindsay Lohan “breastfeeding” Samantha Ronson.

But, until that happy day, W magazine is preparing to release a 21-page spread of photos Brad Pitt took of Angelina Jolie letting those twins lick all up on her twins.

Hotness.

There have been reports that Angelina Jolie is in counseling to help deal with feelings of poor body image since giving birth to twins Vivienne and Knox.  Bravery was apparently the theme of the day as she attended the Changeling movie premiere with my husband Brad Pitt.  Poor thing had to be seen publicly in a size 8 dress.

She’s hot, she’s skinny and I have no idea how she looks this way three months after giving birth to two kids.  I haven’t been that thin since I was eight.  If she is fat, I stand no chance.

 

Papa Pitt has donated $100K to the fight against California’s Prop 8, which aims to overturn the Supreme Court decision making same-sex marriage legal in the state.

“Because no one has the right to deny another their life, even though they disagree with it, because everyone has the right to live the life they so desire if it doesn’t harm another and because discrimination has no place in America, my vote will be for equality and against Proposition 8,” Brad said Wednesday.

More than just donating money, Brad’s helping to draw attention to this proposition, which has gotten sort of lost amidst all the Presidential hoopla. But it’s on the ballot and it’s IMPORTANT.

Californians, get your asses to the polls and vote AGAINST this hateful BULLSHIT. Hopefully this proposition will be defeated by a landslide and send a strong message that at least some parts of this country believe that all people should have, ya know, equal rights.

Brangie’s Jolie-Pitt Foundation has made a $2 million donation to the Global Health Committee to establish a center to aid children affected by tuberculosis and HIV/AIDS in Ethiopia, which they’re going to name after Zahara, having already named a Cambodian health clinic after Maddox.

“Our goal is to transfer the success we have had in Cambodia to Ethiopia where people are needlessly dying of tuberculosis, a curable disease, and HIV/AIDS, a treatable disease,” Angelina said in a statement.

“It is our hope when Zahara is older she will take responsibility of the clinic and continue its mission,” Brad said in a statement.

Heh.

And it is my hope that Zahara will turn it into her own personal crack den, occasionally ranting into a video camera about accidentally killing small animals and her thoughts on sado-masochistic sex.

But we have different long-term goals.

Geez, ya know, when I was a little kid and my dad wanted to spend some quality time with me, he’d, like, toss me into the car and let me eat chicken wings at Hooters while he watched the game with his buddies.

Brad Pitt?*

Takes his sons to the Venice Film Festival.

It’s clear that I was not loved as a child.

* Question: Should we start calling him Brad Jolie-Pitt? I think yes.

Brad Pitt and Zahara do ridiculously adorable things in the south of France.

Seriously.

Will these people adopt me?

I know everybody says that, but I mean it! I love my parents, but I want Brad Pitt to carry me like that.