Katy Perry kissed a boy … and she liked it! (No, seriously, I would never make that joke. But trust me when I say that everyone else will.)

I just wrote about how Paris Hilton was getting it on with the man who invented the word “douchetard,” Doug Reinhardt.

So what’s her ex, Benji, going to do?

Snuggle all over Las Vegas with the worst live performer at this year’s Grammys (and that’s saying something!), Katy Perry.

Following her Valentine’s show at Hard Rock Hotel’s Wasted Space, Perry, 24, and Madden, 29, headed to Lavo – where the two conspicuously cuddled throughout the night, later prompting one observer to sense “some chemistry there.”

Madden, in town to deejay, even danced for Perry during several songs – and at those rare times when their hands weren’t on each other’s legs.

I like basically none of the people involved in any of this, but I have to say Benji comes out on top in this mess. Katy may not be much of a, ya know, singer, but at least she’s not famous for being annoying on reality TV. UPGRADE!

Word on the street is that the two are in a semi-serious relationship — although her camp denies it.

At first I was like, “What on earth could Audrina and Paris Hilton possibly have in common that he would be attracted to both?”

And then it hit me:

Wonky. Eyes.

You find Benji Madden’s heart by staring at the ceiling, ladies.

Benji Madden made it his mission to look like as hardcore a douchebag as he possibly could at the Nylon Mexico magazine launch in Mexico City this weekend.

Seriously?

This is what you’re getting invited to these days, Benji? Boutique magazine parties south of the border?

It’s all good, though — it was clearly an A-list event, as my favorite jailbait meth-head, Cory Kennedy, was there to snuggle up with him. Honestly, Cory’s losing a little of her charm for me. She used to be my Favorite. Z-Lister. Evah. But she’s technically eighteen now, and sometimes she looks a little bit sober, and it’s just not the same as the half-dead sixteen-year-old bag of bones who used to run around Brooklyn with her shirt off and her eye makeup smeared entirely across her gray, lifeless face. Ah, youth is wasted on the young.

Paris Hilton and Benji Madden both appeared at the opening of the D&G store in Bev Hills last night. They walked the red carpet separately. I wonder how it went between the two of them inside …

Joel Madden and Nicole Richie appeared last night at the official launch of the Madden brother’s K-DCMA footwear line.  Nicole continues to look beautiful but I maintain my position that she’s getting scary skinny.

Also there, Benji Madden (of course!), Audrina Patridge and Tila Tequila. 

Do you think people in other countries laugh at us because Tila Tequila is considered famous here in the United States?  I knew that she liked to make out with chicks on TV but I just wiki’d her to educate myself on the back story of Tila.  Yeah, there really isn’t any.  She did release a book on December 2nd titled Hooking Up With Tila Tequila because she had so much advice to offer people.  Like, way more than could ever be typed out on a website.  “I can’t just write a blog on it, because it would be the size of a book.”  And it’s random but, a couple of years ago, she had a clothing line (!) with the slogan of “So hot you’ll just want to take it all off!”  How is it that tilafashion.com is out of business yet Lauren Conrad’s collection still limps along?

Benji Madden — who’s almost never out on the Hollywood scene — has been hitting up the Sunset Strip ever since his split with Paris was announced earlier in the week.

As the paparazzi hounded him yesterday, he employed a typical Paris trick: pretending to be chatting on his cell phone. Looks like he at least learned something from the relationship.

Paris Hilton and Benji Madden have broken up, confirms her rep.

And it looks like the break-up leak? Came from one of Paris’s BFF contestants, Vanessa Fontana, who blabbed to Life & Style about the split. Wonder how Paris feels about that?

Paris has been photographed solo an awful lot lately, most recently getting cozy with her ex-boyfriend, Stavros Niarchos, and now Star magazine is reporting that they’ve broken up.

Shortly after their breakup, which took place on Nov. 17, Paris let her hair down at Villa nightclub, where she partied with her sister, Nicky, and Nicky’s boyfriend David Katzenberg. The following night she was also without Benji when she hit the hot spot Apple Paris.

“Paris was fed up with Benji always telling her what to do and bossing her around,” says the insider. “She couldn’t take his overbearing ways anymore. It was stressing her out. He can be very aggressive and he was just too much trouble.”

Benji didn’t take the breakup well, says the source. “He fought for a second chance and asked if they could talk it out but Paris said she was done talking,” reveals the insider.

The demise of Paris and Benji’s relationship, after nine months of dating, didn’t happen overnight. “They’ve had “a lot of fights in the past,” says the source. The nail in the coffin was a showdown over Paris’ flirty night out with her ex-boyfriend Stavros on Saturday.

“Benji didn’t like it that she spent the evening with Stavros,” says the source. “He blew up and Paris felt victimized. He gave her a lot of grief about that.”

They bottom line is that they were just different people. “She felt she couldn’t cut loose and party,” says the source. “He doesn’t drink and doesn’t think she should either. She felt too fenced in.”

Oooh, yay! Does this mean we get our old Paris back??? The one who gets wasted and does dumb shit and goes to jail??? Please say it does!

At the premiere of Repo! The Genetic Opera in Las Vegas.

God, she is starting to look so much like her mother.

And he? Is starting to look so much like her son.

Paris Hilton’s in NYC with Benji, who’s guest DJing at a bunch of clubs for reasons that baffle me, other than the fact that these clubs shell out the money to get Benji to come and Paris shows up for free.

I like the first picture of Paris, because anyone who’s actually occupied the same club as Paris Hilton will attest that this is the majority of what she does. Honestly, party time is like 80% about lip gloss application for her. I love that the photogs caught her in the act.

Oh, and she’s totes not eating.

Paris Hilton and Benji Madden hit up the Toronto Film Festival on Tuesday for the premiere of Paris, Not France, a documentary film about — what else? — the life of Paris Hilton.

The film is the first feature effort for director Adria Petty.

With close access to Hilton, Petty shot extensive footage of Hilton talking about her image, her notorious sex tape, the tabloid photographers who follow her and just the business of being herself.

“I’m basically being judged, and they’re creating this false person, and I can’t do anything about it,” Hilton says in the film.

Featuring interviews with Hilton’s parents, sister Nicky, publicist Elliott Mintz and such personalities as Donald Trump, “Paris, Not France” follows her on business meetings, a promotional trip to Japan and everyday tasks such as getting a burger at a drive-thru while dozens of photographers take shots of her ordering.

“It’s amazing that this woman is a human being and that people actually can be ruthless enough to forget that,” Petty said. “That’s the one thing about this movie and about that experience with her is I could have just been shooting fluff, but she gave me a lot more.”

Um, is it wrong that I can’t wait to see this film?

Also: WTF is Paris wearing here? Ick.

Because if you look closely, you’ll see that the position of the light and the angle of her face align in just such a way that she appears to have a witch’s nose.

Heh.

At The Bank Nightclub in the Bellagio in Vegas.