So far they just have pics of the “tv personalities” up so I will leave the massive gown post to Beet or Wendie. In the meantime, here are some red carpet pics from last nights Pre-Oscar Dinner at Chateau Marmont. 

Angie Harmon = Gorilla Shoulders. ‘Nuff said. 

Jaime King = Shiny does not equal formal. This looks like one of Blanche Devereaux’ sexy time ensembles. Your hair looks very lush and nourished though. 

Debra Messing = Not everyone is blessed in the mammary region, which is fine, but in the space of one outfit you’ve taken away your waist and given yourself cankles thus making yourself a          rectangle in black tutu. Not good. 

Julianne Moore = Just Blaaaaaaaaaaaaaah. 

Although Dita Von Teese is giving magnificent face I think I will have to award best overall to Camilla Belle and her prodigious brows. Dita ruined it with the velvet shower curtain thing she’s wearing. 

Everyone’s been talking about this leaked Oscar Letter that supposedly lists all the winners. The Academy has completely denied the authenticity of the document, and claims that no such letter exists because letters are never sent to the Academy officers prior to the awards. Of course, if it were real, the only course of action for them to take is total denial…so we shall see. I’m usually more interested in the dresses than the actual awards, but I think Kate’s time has come. She’s recently announced that she will never show her glorious Mommy Body in the nude again. Everyone knows you gotta show the teats (or play some sort of conflicted monster) to get that Oscar gold and she did both this year.

If you’re planning on placing any bets there’s still time to make it to the bookie.

The Independent Spirit Awards are taking place today in Santa Monica. I give credit to Mickey for making it out after the tragic death of the only living creature that would never deny having made out with him. Unlike that pin-up wannabe Evan Rachel Wood, Loki was LOYAL. 

Side note: WTF did Mary Kate stuff into the shoulders of her shapeless sack dress??

More Arrivals:

Grammies are officially underway, people! It never ceases to amaze me how many people with absolutely no musical connections show up to walk the red carpet. For example, UFC fighter Chuck Liddell. Chuck – you punch people for a living. What the fuck are you doing at the Grammies? 

Here are some of the arrivals. I’m sure Beet or Wendie will do an outfit round up in the AM when all the pictures are out. I see some “Worst Dressed” potential already!

You know all that bitching we were doing about Angelina appearing at events dressed in what appeared to be belted nightgowns? Well, I think she got tired of it because this is what she wore to The Orange  British Academy Film Awards.

A few other arrivals are below. Sharon Stone looks amazing, Alesha Dixon went for high drama, Penelope Cruz looks a little like she’s being strangled by a velvet turtleneck, and Dominic Cooper is hot. I don’t like Emma Watson’s dress, but it may just be a bad angle. 

Grammy rehearsals were underway yesterday at The Staples Center and if these wacktastical masks of artistic effort  are any indication of what ’s in store for I might actually tune in. Grammies are happening this Sunday, February 8th, 8pm et/pt on CBS. For a complete list of nominees you can go here.

More unfortunate facial contortions from this year’s Grammy performers..

‘Slumdog Millionaire’ stars Frieda Pinto and Dev Patel

‘Slumdog Millionaire’ – a.k.a. the little film that could – is back on track to win an Oscar next month. Recently allegations surfaced that Danny Boyle, ‘Slumdog’s’ Director, had taken advantage of the young the film’s child stars by paying them less than their due. Boyle managed to clear the air on that front, and with his victory last night reclaimed 1st place in the Oscar race. Almost every director that wins the DGA award goes on to win the Best Film Oscar as well.

I haven’t seen this film yet, but all the buzz is making me wish I had. A sidenote: Virginia Madsen – No. Just…no. That is all.

Also in attendance:

For anybody hoping to make money betting on the Oscars (who does that??) the Screen Actor’s Guild Awards may be your   source for where to place your bets. Pretty much every SAG nod is mirrored by the corresponding Oscar Nomination. Meaning if you follow the winners and losers tonight, you’re almost guaranteed some sort of pay off.  Last year the SAGs were the show with the most celebs due to the writers strike. Hopefully the attendance won’t drop now that that’s over. The SAG awards are playing live right now on TNT and TBS.

Here are some of the arrivals..

In case the Emmy results you care about do not completely overlap with the Emmy results that I care about, the LA Times has the budget to put together the whole list.

I’m a pretty happy Beet about all this; I am thrilled that The Office won; I’m always happy to see Jon Stewart do well; it’s good to see Mariska Hargitay recognized for holding her own against Chris Meloni all these years (I’m sorry but Kathryn Erbe may as well have been a Maltese in Vincent D’Onofrio’s Louis Vuitton); and as long as we’re lauding women here, how fabulous that the Seinfeld Curse was not only broken but spit and menstruated upon by Julia Louis-Dreyfus after all the men tried and failed; and Megan Mullally ought to be voted President of our country, but I guess an Emmy is an okay start.

The only thing I’m mildly annoyed with is the Blythe Danner win. I would have liked to see that go to Chandra Wilson or Sandra Oh, but Chandra will have other chances, I’m sure, and I suppose Sandra can cry herself to sleep clutching her Golden Globe.

Most importantly, Joan Rivers conducted her 1000th red carpet interview (with Debra Messing). Unfortunately, it aired on the TV Guide channel. I love Joan Rivers, and I’m bummed she’s not on E! anymore. Mostly, though, I’ll always pine for that one year long, long ago when they let Kathy Griffin do the red carpet interviews. She asked the kids from Arrested Development if they had any weed. It was probably the highlight of my life, and I pray each night that someone will give her a second chance.