The Hills starlet has been cast alongside fellow “actress” Rumer Willis in the upcoming slasher remake The House on Sorority Row, which sounds a lot like the plot of I Know What You Did Last Summer but probably with more nip-slips and less Jennifer Love Hewitt.

There are two very pleasant pieces of information that come along with this news:

1) The film will be shooting in Pittsburgh, PA this winter, which is far away from LA and paparazzi and maybe we won’t have to see either Audrina or Rumer for several months, which would be lovely. It also brings the possibility that Rumer’s chin will get frostbite and fall off, and maybe then I’ll be able to look at her face without getting ill.

2) It’s not like anyone’s going to see this movie anyway.

You know, every now and then, something will happen that reminds me that I’m getting more mature. Like, I’ll carry the trash bag all the way to the trash chute, instead of just setting it in the hall outside my apartment and trusting that someone else will get so sick of the smell that they’ll take it to the trash chute for me. When I tell people I’m going to the gym later this afternoon, it’s the truth. When my cats are crying because they’re hungry at 6:30 in the morning, I get out of bed and give them food, rather than grabbing the water gun off the bed stand and shooting at them until they shut up. And, in the ultimate proof that I am becoming a full-fledged adult, I no longer care about The Hills. It’s true. I don’t watch it and I don’t want to. Every now and then I get a little pang of guilt about it, but it quickly passes. I really didn’t care at all about The Hills‘ season premiere on Monday and I’m not afraid to admit it.

But here are the pictures. Because I don’t think I’ll ever get old enough that I don’t want to look at other people’s dresses.

Also: Did Heidi get her lips done recently? Yes or no?

Audrina Patridge hosted an evening at Christian Audigier’s night club in Vegas this weekend, and brought along her new flame, BMX-er Corey Bohan, and then proceeded to molest him in front of the cameras all night.

What do we think?

Upgrade or downgrade?

It’s another slow news day (which is so sad, because yesterday was fun!), and that’s the only reason I’m bringing you Audrina Patridge on the cover of Six Degrees magazine.

She looks really stupid, IMHO. Like she’s trying to be a “real” model and just ends up looking dumb.

She’s got nothing on Taylor Momsen.

Audrina Patridge rocks a see-through tank and no bra at the launch party for T-Mobile Sidekick LX in WeHo.

I’m sure her tits are TOTALLY real.

For a close-up of some Audrina nip action (not that you haven’t already seen the whole thing before), jump in.

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Is Audrina Patridge’s new blog.

Whatever CelebBuzz is paying her to do this, it is WAY too much. And whatever they’re paying her ghostwriter? Way, way, WAY too much.

Hire me instead! I can plug stupid beauty products and restaurants and actually make it interesting. Who cares about what Audrina Patridge uses for face wash? I wanna know she takes to make her eyes look so weird! I’d buy it for Halloween and totally freak everyone out!

“I think I’ve been portrayed well on the show. But it’s based on Lauren’s life, so some of the things in my life, like my friends, aren’t on the show: my personal life with my true friends and my family, me going to acting classes, shooting a movie. They filmed a little, but they can’t air everything … I don’t feel like they show me on “The Hills” sticking up for myself. They edit that out. I’m generally happy with how I look when it comes out. In real life, though, I’m bubbly and fun and talkative and when you see me on the show I’m always sitting there and sad. But I’m fine with it because it’s not my show. I’m there because of Lauren.”

Audrina Patridge, being surprisingly reasonable, in a new interview with the LA Times.

I like that at least Audrina realizes and admits that she’s where she is because of Lauren Conrad. It makes me crazy when Heidi and Spencer talk shit about LC, and it’s like: Listen, assholes, you wouldn’t be able to cut the line at a bar in fucking Burbank if it weren’t for Lauren Conrad, let alone be hosting nights at Tao and launching clothing lines. Shut. The fuck. Up.

Despite the constant rumors that they hate each other now, Audrina Patridge and Lauren Conrad look chummy as can be as they head into Crown Bar in LA last night.

I knew these two lovebirds would kiss and make up!