For the second year in a row, Amy Winehouse has pulled out of her performance at the Rock en Seine Festival outside of Paris.

“Amy Winehouse was regrettably unable to perform at the Rock en Seine show in Paris, due to illness,” her spokesman Chris Goodman said. “She was taken ill at her house and wasn’t able to travel to France for the concert.”

The concert organizers were given two hours’ notice that their headliner was not going to be showing up.

OMG.

Why does anybody book this bitch for anything these days? There’s like a 20% chance she’ll show up. Just skip it, guys.

Really, guys. Cancel your meetings. Order in lunch. It’s all over.

Escape from Rehab: The Amy Winehouse Game

Amy has reportedly agreed to go to a rehab that is close to husband Blake’s jail, so that she can get sober while making regular conjugal visits. Frankly, if I were her, I’d think of this as an opportunity to get sober near a constant reminder of what can happen if she doesn’t clean her act up. She’s going to the Focus 12 Clinic, which is only fifteen miles away from Blake’s jail.

Good luck with this, Amy!

Whether or not she’ll remember it is a different story, but Amy Winehouse has so far survived two days of performing at the V Festival in England this weekend.

She’s managing to hold a guitar and not fall down.

Very impressive!

I highly recommend you all read this interview that Defamer did with Russell Brand, the British actor trying to make a splash on the U.S. scene when he hosts the upcoming VMAs.

They basically give him a pop quiz on pop culture, and there are a lot of funny bits in there, but here’s one of my favorites:

DEFAMER: Here’s another easy one: Amy Winehouse.
RUSSELL: Amy has been on several of my television shows in the United Kingdom. She’s a very talented and beautiful girl and in my house, to this day, I have a Mexican doll that for a while lived in her hair.
DEFAMER: [laughs]
RUSSELL: You know those Mexican worry dolls? Or maybe they’re Colombian. You sort of tell it your worries. She took it out of her hair once, gave it to me, and I treasure that little worry doll.

So, yeah.

Amy Winehouse keeps worry dolls in her beehive.

Russell should try unscrewing the head off that worry doll. There’s like $20K worth of heroin in there. Just FYI.

The Daily Mail has a long but fascinating piece about a one-on-one interview with Amy Winehouse. It’s here if you want to read it, but here are some choice quotes.

Downstairs, a growing pack of paparazzi has gathered in a frenzy, inches from her door, with cameras at the ready, anticipating Winehouse’s response to the latest headlines.

For the past hour, Winehouse has been getting ready to meet the paparazzi: she’s been carefully drawing the dark, thick Cleopatra swoops around her eyes, over smudges of make-up past, her long, manicured red fingernails masking a black resin lining, her lip gloss glittering pink, foundation covering little scabs that dot her face.

‘What are you going to say, Amy?’ I ask her from the sofa where I’ve been slumped over, scratching notes for the past few hours.

At 4am, after I’d spent half the night outside her apartment, hoping for an interview, Winehouse had, much to my surprise, opened the door and invited me in for beer.

Since then, Winehouse has been pottering around her house in varying states of consciousness, disappearing every half an hour or so upstairs to her bedroom and returning to talk to me a little about her music, a little about her drugs and a lot about her imprisoned husband.

Through it all, she’s an attentive and open hostess, making tea and giving me extra pieces of paper to take notes.

Now, thinking about the waiting paparazzi outside, she keeps her eyes fastened on her image in the mirror.

‘I could just go out there and say . . . I don’t know.’ Her mouth is slack. ‘I don’t know, really.’ Winehouse gives her hive one last tease and trots gamely down the stairway.

Also, it turns out Amy couldn’t pull her shit together for long enough to actually record the James Bond Quantum of Solace theme song. Alicia Keys and Jack White will be doing it instead.

Amy Winehouse was hospitalized in London on Monday night for what her reps are calling a “reaction to medication.”

And you know what?

I believe it!

If you have a medical background, you’ll know that it’s actually not at all uncommon for people to have a reaction of some kind after self-medicating with crack-cocaine.

“Doctors have advised that she will be kept under observation overnight and is likely to be released tomorrow,” her reps said in a statement.

Sigh.

Get better, Amy.