The Daily Mail has a long but fascinating piece about a one-on-one interview with Amy Winehouse. It’s here if you want to read it, but here are some choice quotes.

Downstairs, a growing pack of paparazzi has gathered in a frenzy, inches from her door, with cameras at the ready, anticipating Winehouse’s response to the latest headlines.

For the past hour, Winehouse has been getting ready to meet the paparazzi: she’s been carefully drawing the dark, thick Cleopatra swoops around her eyes, over smudges of make-up past, her long, manicured red fingernails masking a black resin lining, her lip gloss glittering pink, foundation covering little scabs that dot her face.

‘What are you going to say, Amy?’ I ask her from the sofa where I’ve been slumped over, scratching notes for the past few hours.

At 4am, after I’d spent half the night outside her apartment, hoping for an interview, Winehouse had, much to my surprise, opened the door and invited me in for beer.

Since then, Winehouse has been pottering around her house in varying states of consciousness, disappearing every half an hour or so upstairs to her bedroom and returning to talk to me a little about her music, a little about her drugs and a lot about her imprisoned husband.

Through it all, she’s an attentive and open hostess, making tea and giving me extra pieces of paper to take notes.

Now, thinking about the waiting paparazzi outside, she keeps her eyes fastened on her image in the mirror.

‘I could just go out there and say . . . I don’t know.’ Her mouth is slack. ‘I don’t know, really.’ Winehouse gives her hive one last tease and trots gamely down the stairway.

Also, it turns out Amy couldn’t pull her shit together for long enough to actually record the James Bond Quantum of Solace theme song. Alicia Keys and Jack White will be doing it instead.

Amy Winehouse was hospitalized in London on Monday night for what her reps are calling a “reaction to medication.”

And you know what?

I believe it!

If you have a medical background, you’ll know that it’s actually not at all uncommon for people to have a reaction of some kind after self-medicating with crack-cocaine.

“Doctors have advised that she will be kept under observation overnight and is likely to be released tomorrow,” her reps said in a statement.

Sigh.

Get better, Amy.

Unfortunately, it’s wax. Don’t let Amy near it! She might light it on fire and try to smoke it.

Here’s the Amy Winehouse wax figure at Madame Tusseaud’s in the UK, which was unveiled today.

What do we think, kids?

Will the real Amy Winehouse ever look this good again?

It’s probably a health shake.

Right.

Amy Winehouse sips away during her performance at T in the Park.

Lookin’ good, kiddo!

Okay, I’m sure you’ve all noticed that one thing our world is sorely missing is an Amy Winehouse crotch shot. And, no, we don’t have one of those yet. What we do have: Amy Winehouse pubes! Miles and miles of them.

Amy hit the town with a mystery man and some very low-rise jeans, and showed us a little of the garden she’s growing down. Hell, she’s probably growing weed down there. She’s certainly got room.

Pics are after the jump.

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Amy Winehouse gets her tit grabbed by a female friend as she’s attempting to bum a smoke.

This is not good.

This is not good at all.

Amy Winehouse is going to die soon.

Sigh.

Amy Winehouse reportedly threw a fit and left the London hospital where she’s been treated for the past two weeks. She then partied until 4:30 in the morning and returned home to continue the party with some friends.

However, word is that the next day she checked herself back into the hospital.

I have a T-shirt that I bought at some novelty shop that says “In and Out of Rehab Like It’s My Job.” I thought it was funny, given my job, but it’s all I can think about while writing this story.

Get your shit together before you die, Amy.

My sincerest congratulations and admirations go out to Ms. Amy Winehouse, who has officially reached that elusive pinnacle of any young starlet’s career where news outlets feel compelled to write entire articles on how she was not high at a performance.

About Amy’s performance at Nelson Mandela’s 90th birthday celebration:

After a short struggle to adjust her microphone, Winehouse kicked off the set with “Rehab.” The song’s lack of slurred lyrics and nonshortness of breath combined with particularly effusive backup dancers resulted in major crowd love for the singer, who curtsied and twirled for the fans before next launching straight into “Valerie,” a cover of the Zutons hit she performed on Mark Ronson’s Version.

Remarkably, she left the stage after the two tunes without incident.

Holy shit, hold the presses!

Amy Winehouse — ahem, recent Grammy winner Amy Winehouse — sang two entire songs — in public! — without a visible needle dangling from her arm. IT’S NEWS, PEOPLE!

In things-that-actually-matter news, the concert, which also included performances by Josh Groban, Leona Lewis, Queen, Annie Lennox, Stephen Fry, Quincy Jones and Lewis Hamilton (All of whom may or may not have been high! I can’t be sure! No one’s written an article about it either way!), raised funds for Nelson Mandela’s HIV/AIDS charity, which is very awesomely called 46664. That was his prison number during the twenty-seven years he spent in prison for the “crimes” he committed during his fight against apartheid. Very awesome indeed. You can learn more about 46664 and donate to the cause here.