You guys did a great job of successfully identifying Joey Kern as Ginnifer Goodwin’s new hottie boyfriend, so now I’ve got another one for ya. My boyfriend Adrian Grenier was photographed out and about looking verrrry handsome, but the problem is that he was grabbing lunch with some stupid whore. Who is she????

NAME THAT STUPID WHORE!

I haven’t gotten around to watching the new Osbournes variety show yet (not that I was ever planning to), but the early reviews are god-awful.

Says Entertainment Weekly:

On The Osbournes: Reloaded, Ozzy, Sharon, Kelly, and Jack were just pathetic. No wonder Fox kept chopping this proposed hour-long “variety show” into an ever-smaller size before airing it. The network is supposed to air five more Reloadeds. Don’t hold your breath. Or maybe, do hold your breath: The stink of this show will last a long time.

Thus far, Fox affiliates in Panama City, Milwaukee, Cincinatti, Knoxville, Kansas City and Utah have elected to either not carry the show or air it after midnight rather than in its suggested post-Idol time slot.

And from the reviews, it sounds like these affiliates aren’t being prudish, the show is just REALLY awful and offensive. But not in a creative and envelope-pushing way, just plain old gross for the sake of being gross.

Fox was originally going to air five more episodes of the show in the fall, but somehow I doubt that’s going to happen at this point. Heads are gonna roll for this at Fox.

So is it over now? Is the Osbournes thing finally over now? Has our national love affair with these people at last signed the divorce papers? Can we, America, please be the strong ones in this relationship, and end it once and for all, so that the Osbournes can heal and move on?

Hi. I’m exhausted. I spent the evening babysitting a friend’s 3-month-old baby. Then I came home and took my birth control pill. I completely and totally love this little girl, but babies are SO EXHAUSTING. I have never been with anything that required that much constant attention, with the possible exception of the erection of a much older man I once dated. Truly, I don’t know how mothers do it all day every day. You guys are hard core. Olympic marathoners have absolutely nothing on full-time mothers, I’m convinced now. That shit really is the hardest job in the world.

So whatever I come home and I’m trying to think of shit to write about and I’m tired through to my bones after just 2.5 hours alone with an infant, and some PR chick has sent me an email called “Bridget Widget.” I laughed like I’d just smoked a shitload of weed. (I did not just smoke a shitload of weed.) But it’s this stupid widget about Bridget Marquardt’s new TV show on the Travel Channel. I’m posting it here because I like Bridget, I think she’s good people, and her name rhymes with “widget,” and, really, a person should be able to capitalize on something like that. Plus it’s an easy post. BLOGS ARE EASIER THAN BABIES.

My totally awesome friend Lexie has recently launched a fantastic blog about living life with diabetes. It’s called I Run on Insulin, and you can check it out here. Lexie’s lived with diabetes since she was young, and she works in the medical industry and is very involved with the American Diabetes Association. Lexie knows everything about living with diabetes. She’s always being quoted and interviewed on TV or in books or on the radio for her expertise and her amazing personality and positive take on things. Plus she’s funny as hell. You can’t be around Lexie and not be laughing. She’s smart and athletic and gorgeous and kind and driven and just a blast to be around. She’s an inspiration to us all!

Her blog is a stellar resource for people who want to get involved in treating and preventing diabetes, people who want to learn more about the disease, or people living with it who want to read about Lexie’s personal experiences and share their own.

Check out IRunOnInsulin.com!!!!
Check out IRunOnInsulin.com!!!!
Check out IRunOnInsulin.com!!!!
Check out IRunOnInsulin.com!!!!
Check out IRunOnInsulin.com!!!!

“I was an addict for all practical purposes, that I had never stuck to a real diet, that I’d never stuck to a real exercise program, and that when confronted by my doctor and the doctor said if you don’t make changes, you will die. I had no choice. When you hear people say, oh, you took the easy way out, I would have longed for an easy way. It was not an easy way. It was this — the hardest struggle of my whole entire life and I still struggle.”

Star Jones, discussing her gastric bypass surgery with Oprah on a special weight-loss episode airing Wednesday.

I’m not a giant Star Jones fan, but I’m glad she’s out there saying this. I’m firmly of the belief that many people who are obese suffer from an addiction to food, as psychologically powerful as any addiction. You can’t effectively address the disease JUST by putting someone on a diet, in the same way that you can’t effectively treat alcoholism by handing someone a Diet Coke. There’s much deeper work to be done before a person can hope to be successful in the long term.

It’s obviously a huge issue in this country, and I feel like the longer we treat it like these people just need to find a diet that works without addressing the — excuse the pun — giant elephant of addiction in the room, the longer we’ll continue to see obesity-related illnesses and expenses on the rise. So, ya know, good for you, Star.

At least that’s what it looks like. It looks like a screaming monster tore its way through this woman’s face. I can’t even imagine what her vagina looks like, if this is how poorly her face has held up over the past few years. Nikki, 37, got a divorce from Ian Ziering in 2002, and she just gave birth to a healthy baby named named Tatum Ella Reynolds. The baby was born in Newport Beach, because, honestly, if you’re a former Playmate who names her daughter Tatum, there’s just no reason for her to ever go anywhere other than Newport Beach. She’ll be fine just staying in Newport her entire life. Make it easy on the coroner.

Tatum’s baby daddy is Nikki’s boyfriend, total nobody Rick Reynolds.

And if you’re wondering where Ian Ziering’s sky-rocketing career has taken him lately, he’s got a film called National Lampoon’s The Legend Of Awesomest Maximus in post-production, where he plays a character called Testiclees. Yes. Testiclees.

For comparison, in the thumbnails I’ve posted some pics of Nikki that were taken in 2006. The past few years have not been good to this woman. She either needs to sue life or her plastic surgeon at this point. Someone needs to be held accountable for the state of her face.

Poor Danny Gokey!

He has been going through a lot of awful shit in his personal life lately!

Less than a year after the death of his wife, Danny returned home to Wisconsin this weekend to attend his grandfather’s funeral. Idol producers had no comment on it, but they said that Danny would be back in LA to perform on the show today.

I have to hand it to Danny, as much shit as he’s been through, he really doesn’t play the “sob story” card on the show. He only talks about his wife and her passing when reporters grill him about it for a story. He’s not sitting there gabbing Ryan’s ear off about his dead wife on live television in hopes of grabbing sympathy votes, and I give him a lot of credit for that. He seems like a really great dude. (My heart still belongs to the gay, gay sex machine of Adam Lambert, though! Sorry Danny!)