Congratulations to the one seemingly stable member of the Spears clan, 31-year-old brother Bryan, who just screwed everything up by marrying into this nonsense. Bryan tied the knot with lil’ sis Jamie-Lynn’s manager, Graciella Sanchez, on Wednesday in New Orleans. Britney and the rest of the Spears clan were there.

Fergie and Carmen Electra pose pretty for the cameras at the NYE party at The Venetian in Las Vegas.

I’ve gotta go with Carmen Electra. I love that she’s touching Fergie’s ass here while Fergie’s just like, “Yeah, I don’t really need attention that badly.”

Here are some shots of Paris at her much-hyped NYE party in Australia for The Bongo Virus, which appears to be some sort of online social networking tool — one that, I assume, will be reporting a loss for 2008. Maybe this shit is a bigger deal in Australia (anyone who lives there ever heard of it?), but I don’t even want to know what they paid Paris and Nicky Hilton to show up there on New Year’s Eve. Oh, and the party was an “online” party, so you could actually pay to attend the party via the Internet. Dude, if you’re that damn set on drinking at home alone, go to an AA meeting, not an Internet party.

Anyway.

This whole thing just seems so ridiculous to me.

What’s the buzz like in Australia?

People said they’d never last, but Tony Parker and Eva Longoria Parker were all snuggles and kisses at the New Year’s party she hosted at Beso in LA.

You gotta admit, they’re totally adorable together.

Lindsay rung in 2009 — where else? — in a DJ booth with girlfriend Samantha Ronson as the two gazed adoringly at each other. SamRo was spinning at Mansion in Miami Beach. Will 2009 be the year they officially come out as a couple? Eh, who am I kidding? 2009 will be there year Lindsay goes through a messy break-up, gets a DUI and goes to rehab, just like every year before it.

Image via WENN

Wow, is every aspect of the news more scandalous than celebrity gossip lately? It sure does feel like it.

Okay, so remember how the governor of Illinois, Rod Blagojevich (pronounced Bla-GOY-uh-vich), was “allegedly” accepting bribes for who would get the Senate seat vacated by Obama? And that’s super duper illegal and stuff? Well, he hasn’t actually been convicted of this stuff yet, and he refuses to resign from him post despite his whole party begging him to, and he went right ahead and appointed someone, this dude Roland Burris, who’s planning to report for duty on Tuesday to be inaugurated. Senate Democrats are like “Oh hell no,” and they’re planning to exercise their right to refuse him entry to the Senate.

The first Democratic aide said if Burris tries to enter the Senate chamber on Tuesday, the Senate doorkeeper will stop him. If Burris were to persist, either trying to force his way onto the Senate floor or refusing to leave and causing a scene, U.S. Capitol police would stop him, the aide said.

“They [police] probably won’t arrest him,” but they would call the Senate’s sergeant-at-arms, the aide said.

Burris has indicated he intends to be at the Senate on Tuesday. When asked about what would happen if he shows up, Burris told the Chicago Tribune that he is “not going to create a scene in Washington.”

SO MUCH DRAMA!!!

We may as well elect Lindsay Lohan and Denise Richards and Courtney Love — it couldn’t be much more of a shit-show over there in DC!

But this isn’t any ordinary speeding — Dillon was going a whopping 106 mph on a Vermont interstate in a rented 2009 Chevrolet Impala. Talk about a badass … I mean, if you’re gonna drive over 100 mph, you just gotta do it in a Chevy Impala.

It doesn’t appear he was under the influence or on his way to get a blow job, so he’ll probably get off with a slap on the wrist, although the law allows for him to be sentenced to up to three months in jail. He’s scheduled to appear in court on January 21.