How Long Until He Has a Red String on His Wrist and Gives Up Dairy?
December 20th, 2008 by Wendie
Page Six has identified male model Jesus Luz as Madonna’s newest conquest. Don’t you appreciate that I didn’t call him “boy toy”? Because seriously, almost every article I’ve read about this hook-up calls him that. I won’t call her “Material Girl” either. They met while doing a W magazine photo shoot. A source said “Everyone knows they are ficando- which is a Portuguese expression that means they are kissing and doing other things but without any obligation of being faithful or getting into a relationship afterwards.” I never knew this job would require so much Portuguese translating but the English word for “ficando” is “fucking”. I wonder how A-Rod feels about this.
In other news, as Madonna continued the interminable Sticky & Sweet tour in Sao Paolo, she supposedly started crying when many of her fans sang Evita songs to her. She probably didn’t emote that much writing out a $80M check to Guy. But masses of people singing their adoration for her to her? Floods of soy-based tears.
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woowww. how old is he, 18?
here in Brazil we say that slang in way lighter stuff, like drew barrymore was ficando with ed westwick, you know, I guess it’s something like “fooling around” or “make out”.
heh, what modonna’s doing is child abusing.
and, he’s not even that hot.
Omg what?
That boy is FOINE.
i wish i had a small bottle of madonna’s tears to wear around my neck. could do wonders for my social life.
I really can’t stand Madonna. She’s fifty years old, has a child and is STILL fooling around. Slutty.
touche!
y can i see his pubic hair eww gross
And ummm….HOW old are you exactly?
I thought people were scared of cooties and the like in maybe…first grade?
honestly, i don’t think it’s attractive for a guy to have his pubes sticking out of his…. briefs? that’s what i’m guessing he’s wearing.
wow ur not very classy r u it gross to see someones pubes out their short especially when their tryin 2 be hot
oh i LOVE that tiny hint of pubic hair. i just want to rub my hands/face/boobs/etc down that washboard abs of his. this guy is so fine.. nice catch, m.
LOL
totally think the same way!
Sounds like a ploy for publicity by a smart publicist to me. But hey, no complainin. That picture just made my day a little bit brighter. Niiice.
Is i just me, or does he kind of look like Andy Samberg?
omg, lmao. He does, with a wicked need for a brazilian wax job…gross.
Madonna is GRODY and CREEPY and OLD. That dude would be much better off with someone from his own age demographic…like me!
Get it girl! She’s obviously doing something right! Rock on!!
Omg. I almost vomited. That’s a huge age gap :X
protuding pee pee hair… maybe that’s his way of proving he’s legal? like, “hey i know i look like i’m 12, but i’m actually of age because i’ve got pubes.”
laughing.
my.
ass.
off.
ficando good article, wendi. :)
Good one – thanks for the laugh!
The way I look at it – if the sexes were swapped around: it’d just be another stereotypical famous couple with a 35 yr age gap (he looks all of 15 right?) that no one would even talk about.
Hell at least she didn’t shack up with her son (eg. Woody Allen)
Okay everything about this article is hilarious, but “soy-based tears” takes the cake.
ummm, unsexy. i mean no offense here but i think there’s absolutely nothing about him that makes him hot.
yeah, i don’t find him attractive either, he’s a cutie, but not my type. i like redheads. i’m weird, i know.
I give him a free pass on the man snatch because he has a great body, but I’m not sure I could deal with the hair on his head. Ew.
everything about him is gay
Jesus!!!!
Here in Brazil…how can I explain..”ficando” is the same as ”having a affair”…like…kissing but not dating…but not fucking!!!…hehehe it’s funny for me to read you writting in potuguese…I’m happy, portuguese is difficult…
Even more creepy, the fact that his name is Jesus. Interesting, non? Madonna and Jesus. Terrible……
hhahhaha
i didnt think of that…LOL
I was hoping I wasn’t the only one who noticed that…..very creepy indeed…..
1 – “ficando” is not fucking…livia is right.
2 – he is hot indeed.
”ficando” can be many things…but usually is not that strong!
And he is HOT!..but Madonna could do a whole lot better in Brazil…
soy-based tears…lol… I love you Beet!
He’s probably already wearing a red string around his rhymes-with-rock and has given up any hope of ever be taken seriously.
All over my face!!