Petey Pete called into the Ryan Seacrest show on Tuesday morning to chat about his child’s name, Bronx Mowgli Wentz. He gave a really weak explanation for the “Mowgli” part: “The Jungle Book was something that me and Ashlee bonded over. It’s a cool name.” Um, WTF? Like, vodka was something that my ex and I bonded over, but it’s not like we were going to name our child Belvedere. (We planned to name him Horseman, but that’s a different story.) Enjoying the same book is not an adequate reason to name a child Mowgli.

Pete refused to talk much about the Bronx part of the equation. He should have been like “Well the Bronx has always been our favorite place to score coke,” but instead he said “We came up with the idea Bronx. We’ve been throwing [ideas] back and forth a while. It’s kind of cool to just leave the narrative what it is. People are stoked or pissed or whatever. And you’re like, you know what: I don’t think anyone really has the real story.”

Regardless, congrats to the happy family!

Yes, Wino’s back in the hospital, once again for an “adverse reaction to medication.” I’ll make the same joke I made last time: the medication in question is crack.

Her spokesdude says was admitted to the hospital on Sunday after suffering an allergic reaction. She is currently undergoing tests and will remain there for observation.

I’m not at all worried. Nothing can hurt Amy Winehouse. She is invincible. If it were possible for her to die, it definitely would have happened by now. Amy will outlive us all. She’s probably like those vampires in Twilight. Except instead of being a “vegetarian” vampire who only drinks animal blood, Amy is a “crackhead” vampire who only consumes crack-cocaine.

Hmmm …

A-Rod’s soon-to-be ex-wife, Cynthia Rodriguez, has reportedly written a scathing email to a friend which “leaked” to the press:

My 6-foot-3, 220-pound soul-less, soon-to-be ex-husband is abandoning his kids on Thanksgiving to be with Madonna … She called and he ran on her command back to New York City … Gross!

Listen, I don’t claim to know much in this world, but I can say with a fair amount of certainty that A-Rod’s wife is nowhere near that adept with a hyphen. This shit was written by a publicist.

It may, however, be true that Alex is ditching his fam to spend Thanksgiving with Madonna and her kiddos, which might be shitty, unless there’s some sort of agreement in place that Cynthia gets the kids this holiday and is just trying to make A-Rod look bad in the press.

Either way, I don’t really give a shit.

Holy wow, kids! Everything’s coming up TRAINWRECK BRITNEY!

We have her MTV documentary to look forward to, and now an upcoming interview with Rolling Stone offers another up-close-and-personal look at the girl who owns the epithet of troubled pop tart.

You can read the first part of the interview here. Some fun excerpts:

Britney today has about as many legal rights as when she was in the Mickey Mouse Club. She is watched over day and night by security guards Jamie hired (and she’s paying for); it’s also rumored that Britney’s phone calls are closely monitored and that she’s not allowed to drive her own Mercedes. Recently, says one source with ties to the Britney camp, Jamie fired a guard who let the singer use his phone.

She also talks about her kids and the time they spent with Kevin:

“I didn’t think my husband was gonna leave me,” she says, deadpan. She laughs to break the tension. “Otherwise, I’d be with my babies 24/7. But since they’re almost like twins, they both take care of each other. I think they look like me,” she says, going from affectionate to bitter as she gets distracted by thoughts of Federline, whom she sees only when one of them is picking up the boys. “They don’t look like their father at all,” she continues. “And it’s weird ’cause they’re starting to learn words like ’stupid,’ and Preston says the f-word now sometimes. He doesn’t get it from us. He must get it from his daddy. I say it, but not around my kids.”

And the opening line is a doozy:

There’s an understanding among those who know Britney well: When she’s blond, she’s happy. When she’s brunette, she’s sad. When she’s pink, she’s crazy.

OMG, ya’ll!

I’m SO EXCITED!!!

Cody Herpin — the husband Jodie Sweetin just walked out on — sat down with Radar magazine to do a little interview, right in front of their baby’s crib! HOW SUBTLE!

Cody says Jodie took the baby, all the money and the family dog! How awful! He actually seems sane and healthy not at all psychopathic in this video, which furthers my belief that whatever’s going on is all Jodie’s fault.

At the Australia premiere in NYC.

Homegirl’s shit is seriously froze over.

Which is ironic, because she looks like hell.

Mel B, Nia Long, and model Chanel Iman, along with Mel’s husband, Stephen Belafonte, brought a bunch of Thanksgiving goodies to needy families in Los Angeles’s South Central neighborhood on Monday.

It’s easy and fun to help when there are cameras around!

For reals, though, people, the economy sucks right now, in case you didn’t get the memo. You know what that means? It means that families in need are more in need than ever. And nothing will help you feel better about your own crappy financial situation than helping out someone in an even worse position than you. I’m serious! Don’t forget to give back this holiday season! If you don’t have any money to give, you can donate your time. There are SO MANY opportunities this time of year. Get out there and get involved and create holiday cheer for everyone. For ideas, check out the Salvation Army in your area or talk to your local church, synagogue, food bank or mission.