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Take Off That Ridiculous Hat, Detective Stabler

October 20th, 2008 by Evil Beet


And, while you’re at it, also take off that belt and those pants and throw me on the bed and take all the stress of your long, hard, thick detective job out on me. Ooh, baby. Fuck yeah. Solve that crime.

Seriously, Chris Meloni fucking sucks and I’ll tell you why. This sonofabitch refuses to walk a single damn red carpet if he can’t bring along his stupid wife of 1000 years and his one billion children with her. How am I supposed to take my Detective Stabler sex fantasies seriously when you pull this shit? Think of your fans, Chris.

Here he is not having sex with me at the Children Affected by AIDS Foundation Dream Halloween benefit in NYC.

Also there: James Gandolfini, with his new wife and his old kids.


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This entry was posted on Monday, October 20th, 2008 at 12:01 am and is filed under Christopher Meloni. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.

13 Responses to “Take Off That Ridiculous Hat, Detective Stabler”

  1. Lynn says:
    October 20, 2008 at 3:42 am

    Chris Meloni is SHORT!

    I was gong to say that James Gandolfini’s son is unfortunate looking, but then decided that would be mean because he’s just a kid and it’s not his fault that he looks like his Dad – AT 50 – but, with too-long hair. So I won’t point that out.

    Reply
  2. rayne says:
    October 20, 2008 at 4:01 am

    mmmmmmmmm detective stabler……mmmmmmmm

    (that hat really has to go though)

    Reply
  3. niblet says:
    October 20, 2008 at 4:50 am

    he looks like danny tanner in this get-up

    Reply
  4. Shiri says:
    October 20, 2008 at 5:11 am

    I wouldn’t call 6ft a giant, but neither is this short (or am I not getting an insider joke here?).

    Reply
  5. BettyCrockerPunkRocker says:
    October 20, 2008 at 5:39 am

    Beet, I am so with you on this one. Er, I don’t mean like together, ON this one…wait, I said that like that was a bad thing…

    Ahem. My original point was that Chris Meloni is super hot, but that hat is a major bonerkiller.

    Reply
  6. swillz says:
    October 20, 2008 at 6:47 am

    OZ

    Reply
  7. DonkeyIsAJackass says:
    October 20, 2008 at 8:45 am

    eww Beet.

    Reply
  8. piedlourde says:
    October 20, 2008 at 9:01 am

    Chris Keller, you sexy mofo!

    Reply
  9. Lynn says:
    October 20, 2008 at 9:35 am

    Every time I see him, I think of him nekked in Oz. He was so often nicely nekked on that show.

    Reply
  10. meh says:
    October 20, 2008 at 10:18 am

    i almost choked on my Sugar Babies when i read, new wife old kids….

    Reply
  11. torie says:
    October 20, 2008 at 2:02 pm

    haha, amen, beet!
    i mean, like… good for him and shit…
    aka FUCK.

    Reply
  12. PoliteTia says:
    October 20, 2008 at 2:12 pm

    OMG! I didn’t even recognize him and I watch the marathons, religioulsy.

    Reply
  13. Donkey Punch says:
    October 20, 2008 at 8:12 pm

    I know someone who worked with him and, compared to the rest of the cast, he was a dickhead.

    Reply

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