Hugh Hefner’s Latest Girlfriends Are Felons
October 9th, 2008 by Evil Beet
Oh, yay!!!
TMZ dug up some dirt on Karissa and Kristina Shannon, Hef’s newest squeezes.
Karissa (left) and Kristina Shannon (right) — who have recently moved into the Playboy Mansion — were both busted by St. Petersburg, Fla. police for felony aggravated battery back in January. They both received probation and were ordered to pay restitution to the two victims.
Karissa also has a misdemeanor battery charge on her record from 2007. Atta girl!
Playboy had no comment.
WTF???
I want more back story here. Who the hell did they beat up? And why? This could make for some very interesting television, indeed. I bet Holly’s having a good laugh over this shit.
Also, let’s do a brief before/after comparison of the girls with this photo taken this month:
Can you say chin implant?
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Does the girl on the left have double eyebrows? Freaky
Dude, the sister on the left is blowing *my* fucking mind with her double eyebrows… it’s like, fucking up my equilibrium just staring at her face. Besides this unexplainable eyebrow phenomenon, (UEP), I think they look a whole lot better and less like burnt turds than in their pic with Hef.
When they told these dumb bitches that they had to pay restitution did they start taking off their clothes?
will they spank him?
is he still apt to endure that????
Felons, hahahaha. That must be why Kendra said she was locking her door.
They look way better in the, what I am assuming are, mug shots. In the photo with Hef they look like some weird oompaloompa/cabbagepatch doll cross.
Can you say “orange” – god they look retarded.
They’re so orange, eeew. I mean, Holly, Bridget, and Kendra look like human beings, these girls look like they might as well start sticking the heroine needle in their eyeballs right now.
I mean, their mugshots look a lot hotter than them all dressed up!
you can definitely say orange.
Now I understand what Kendra was saying on Chelsea Lately…. “there are some nasty ass hoes hanging out in the mansion now” hahahah And that she locks her door and hides in her room when she is there so no one steals her shit.
But seriously, I’m really bummed by this. Hef’s girls got too famous on him. The girls next door ruined them like newlyweds did nick and jessica.
Ps. It’s a sad day when Hef has to lower himself to these 2 skanky, ugly as sin double eyebrowed gold diggers.
Screw the chin implants… that damn orangey “glow” is driving me insane. Holly, Kendra and Bridget are probably laughing and thinking how he’s downgraded.
they’re uglier with all the make-up and skankiness.
Girl farthest from Hef has the same smile “Rollergirl” had in Boogie Nights when the dude they picked up off the street for a reality fuck video realized she was the same girl he went to high school with and she is denying it…right before she face stomps him with her roller skates.
Not sure about the chin implant. I want Holly or Kendra to blog about this shiz. Kendra did say quite a bit on Chelsea though……
EB thugs need love too!
No reply because Heff’s wrinkled horny ass is already dead. He may have survived sex with Kendra & Holly, but these crazy ass bitches are professional.
So long Heff…. I barely knew ye.
Good Lord, these girls must glow in the dark. I imagine under a blacklight they cast the same sort of soft glow as a Velvet Elvis painting. When did “tan” get so mixed up with “burnt sienna?”
The mug shots definitely look better. Ugly or what, they look like oompa loompas!
what are double eyebrows?
TMZ updated the story:
UPDATE 6:40 PM PT: We just talked to a relative of one of the victims and here’s what they tell us went down. The twins went out after work with one of their Wing House co-workers, Erica Civello, to a house party. Kristina allegedly started arguing with Erica, and Karissa came up behind her and hit Erica over the head with a bottle of beer and they both “jumped her.” Erica suffered a concussion.
So it kinda explains what happened.
Nothing like getting plastic surgery to make your self uglier, it should become a new trend.
“They both received probation and were ordered to pay restitution to the two victims.”
In the earlier quote it said there were two victims. Who was the other victim?
also, look closely and you’ll see they both have the double eyebrows. Thing, er, Twin #2 just does a better job of dealing with it.
It’s a sad day when a bum like me gets hotter chics then Hef.
yeah they don’t look good period. But you really think they look better in the mugshots? You serious? I don’t. I think they look better in the picture with Hef. Minus the orange crap, they look better there to me. In the mugshot to me they just look gross. The other picture they look skanky but um, ok enough. Don’t like their hair curly though.
in the pic with hef, their skin tone is the same color as an oompa loompas. seriously it is not even acceptable to go out in public with that shade of ORANGE on your face.
Here is Kristina’s MySpace!!
• http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendID=245771473
: )
I need to know about the double eyebrows. What the hell is going on there? It’s driving me CRAZY!!!!!
Orange-you-glad your 19 year-old daughters are banging a geriatric?
Jesus Christ. There are no words. Can you imagine posing naked with your sister? That is just GROSS.
Oh, and shouldn’t they have fake boobs? I am actually surprised at the lack of boobage.
oh yeah. AND i think they look far better in their mugshots- that is, to say, they look better with their natural skin tone
orange is icky
They are extremely unattractive. I hope Bridget leaves to because I would hate if she was stuck with those skanks
they look like shit now more than they did in their mugshots, and that’s just not okay. and oh yeah, battery and shit? CLASSY.
ugh.
Are they wearing pink paint instead of clothing?
i think so slouchy… such class.
Beet, I am so disappointed with myself. I read the article, saw the picture (more specifically I saw their eyebrows), had a laugh attack and happily page dn-ed to write a snarky yet hilarious comment about the twinkies’ utterly horrendous and appropriately titled “double eyebrows”. Low and behold I find myself far too late and feeling worthlessly unoriginal.
… Oh well. At least I don’t have to fuck a thousand year old pervert… or one of these two.
Good job Hef, you went from three great girls to banging a pair of oompa loompas. Let’s hope Bridget gets the hell out of there.
It’s a good thing Halloween is coming up, these girls will go along great with the pumpkins. As much as I hate talking shit, I seriously do not find these girls half as attractive as his former ladies.
Just so long as they are ok putting Pampers on him after the sex is done I guess they will fare ok.
I heard on Ryan Secrest this morning that they used to work at this knock off Hooters restruant, and they beat up one of the co-workers. I guess they were at a party after work and one of the twins started arguing with the girl, so the other twin smashed a beer bottle on the girls head. And while she was on the floor they both just started kicking her ass. WTF if Hef doing with these ghetto chick?!?!?!
These two pieces of trash were arrested this past January in St. Petersburg, Florida for beating a bitch at a house party.
One of the relatives of the victim said the twins, who worked at Wing House at the time, went to a party with one of their co-workers named Erica. Kristina got into an argument with Erica which led to Karissa hitting Erica over the head with a bottle. After that, both of the trash bag twins jumped Erica. They were arrested and later given probation and were ordered to pay restitution. Erica suffered a concussion.
Karissa was also arrested last year for allegedly beating another bitch.
I think the double eyebrow thing is just caused from her raising her eyebrows… its just the muscles.
jesus christ. somone needs to tell that girl….YOU NEVER PLUCK FROM OVER, ALWAYS UNDER!!!!!!!!! wow but seriously, can a human being naturaly become that shade of orange? i mean without consuming copious amounts of carrots.
pretty much they are nasty, naked, white trash sisters who feel comfortable sharing a man who is older then thier father who, just a guess, was not the best role modle of a dad.
i think if you had hepatitis(yellow) and then were poisoned by carbon dioxide(red) you might get that shade.
What a surprise that twins who would audition to have the same octogenarian boyfriend have a history of felony assault and battery.
You’d better count the silverware, Hef.
maybe that’s what kendra meant in that interview where she referred to skanky hoes in the mansion and having to lock her door.
As Jack Horner said when Johnny Wad replaced Dirk Diggler, “It is what it is”.
@ Joan
That is frickin hilarious!
wooooow.!! They are very orange. Kendra and Holly are definitely better looking
fucking whores. dude hugh henfer is so fucking horney that old fuck. He’s fucked all his life and he still craves it. Fucking die or something.
I LIVE HERE IN ST. PETE FL., AND I KNOW THEM FROM WINGHOUSE. I THOUGHT HEF PICKED HOTTER CHICKS, MAYBY HIS VISIONS GETTING WORSE WITH AGE.? THEY WERE ALWAYS FLIRTATIOUS AT WORK, AND THEY DEFINATELY LOOKED ALOT MORE NATURAL AND LESS CREEPY.
i really like their tanning-bed-goggles-white-raccoon-eye thing they have going on.
I wish they would’ve run up on me like that…I would’ve beat one twin with the other twin! LMAO!….BTW I just sent a message to Kristina’s myspace page and the subject said “So ur one of Hef’s new hoes?” then the body said “Ha Ha! Eeeewwww!” ….that chick is gonna be mad! But it don’t matter she couldn’t touch this if she was Mc Hammer! Ha Ha!
I’m sorry but the girls in the pic with Hef have fat face syndrome.