Mary-Kate Olsen is not toothless!

The tiny twin — who stars in the upcoming film The Wackness — showed up at the film’s screening and actually smiled!

We now officially have adult photos of both Olsen twins smiling.

I never thought the day would come.

By the way, MK makes out with her 64-year-old co-star, Ben Kingsley, in the film, a clip which I sincerely look forward to finding on YouTube soon. “She was completely in charge,” says Kingsley of the make-out sesh.

With her mom in London preparing her divorce from Guy Ritchie, Lourdes is spending the summer in NYC with her papa, Carlos Leon.

Carlos reportedly lost his shit with the photogs just after this picture was taken. “I’ll see you alone one day!” he screamed at them. (Notes the photo agency: “He had just picked up Lourdes and was only photographed for about a minute before hailing a taxi.”)

Anyway, Lourdes is going to be such a strikingly beautiful young woman, if only someone would just tweeze her eyebrows. I swear to you Madonna is forcing her to keep that stupid unibrow if only because it’s a sure-fire way to keep the boys away.

The results are in!

The celebrity with the biggest ego — with nearly 20% of your votes — is Perez Hilton himself! Although most of you qualified your responses with “(well, he’s not really a ‘celebrity’)”. The runner-up is his namesake, Paris Hilton. The teacher has become the student!

Rounding out the top egos are Kanye West, Mario Lopez, Tom Cruise, and Heidi Montag/Spencer Pratt.

Other amusing suggestions:

Max Beet (my cat)
Kim Kardashian
Tinkerbell Hilton
Cisco Adler’s Man-Purse (?)
Arnold Schwarzenegger
Amy Winehouse’s Weave
Katherine Heigl

The good folks at EGO Hands-Free have agreed to give away TWO EGO Cups to two lucky winners. (Thanks, EGO!)

Our winners are:

Shayne M:

The celebrity with the biggest ego is Perez Hilton because he STILL thinks people want to meet him. I guess he wasn’t at the opening of his Hot Topic clothing line either.

and

Sara B:

The celebrity with the biggest ego is Heidi & Spencer because even Gary Coleman needs someone to laugh at.

Honorable Mentions (sorry, no prize, but you guys made me laugh):

Joni S:

The celebrity with the biggest ego is Max Beet because he has his own brown nosing attachment, in the form of Leo Beet.

The McClellands:

The celebrity with the biggest ego is Paris Hilton because she needs to balance out her feet.

Sarah B:

The celebrity with the biggest ego is Perez Hilton because he uses his EGO cup to call his own “Gossip on the Go” hotline to hear himself talk. (Way to integrate the product into your response, Sarah! Have you considered a career in marketing?)

Thanks again for playing, and make sure to check out EGO’s entire line of hands-free products to prepare yourself for the hands-free legislation going into effect July 1.

So Bill Murray totally got ass-raped in his divorce from his wife, Jennifer Butler Murray.

I’ll pause here while you all hurry to the comment section to remind me that rape jokes are not funny. See, I think a rape joke delivered by, say, Mike Tyson, is not funny. Well, perhaps funny in the awkward silence that would inevitably follow, while you’re all looking at each other like, “Did Mike Tyson just make a rape joke? If we laugh, does that make us horrible people? If we don’t laugh, will he rape us?” But I think a rape joke delivered properly by me can, in fact, be funny, and furthermore works toward a longer-term goal of making rape a less taboo subject and therefore encouraging women to speak openly and honestly about it to their friends, their family, and the police. But I digress.

Once you’re done, you can come back here and read about how his wife walked away with primary custody of all four of their children and two of their houses. Plus Bill gets to pay his wife a lump sum of $7M, as per their pre-nup.

This is nothing compared to what Madonna will soon be shelling out to Guy Ritchie.

You don’t see much of these two in public these days, but Justin Timberlake took girlfriend Jessica Biel and her doggy, Tina, for a walk in LA.

What’s with Jessica’s hair?

Check out this fun footage of Tim McGraw personally roughing up a front-row fan who was attacking a young woman during his rendition of “Indian Outlaw.” He grabs the man — wife-beater and all — pulls him up on stage and then kicks his drunk, loser ass out of the show.

Awesome.

As I told you guys a couple weeks ago, it appears Madonna is moving forward with a divorce from Guy Ritchie.

Madonna is currently working with Paul McCartney’s divorce attorney on preparing her divorce from Guy Ritchie.

Sources continue to confirm that the two did NOT have a pre-nup, so currently Guy stands to take 50% of Madonna’s net worth — which is, by modest estimates, A WHOLE FREAKIN’ LOT.

Tellingly, there’s been no denial from Madonna’s camp about these reports.