Katie Price — aka Jordan — launches her new lingerie collection in Britain.

The 16-year-old celeb sib will appear on the pilot of Miss Guided, a new series for ABC. The series stars Judy Greer — you know, that blonde chick with the skinny nose who always plays the principal character’s best friend? — as “a formerly awkward high school student who returns to her alma mater all grown up — and as a guidance counselor.” Ashton Kutcher is the executive producer on the series, and he’ll apparently also appear in the pilot.

The episode was taped in October. JLS announced she was pregnant in late December. Was she already preggers when the episode taped? It’s anyone’s guess.

Okay.

So I’m driving in my car the other day, listening to the radio, and this song comes on that I’ve never heard before. I love it instantly. I’m like, “This is such a cool song, I have to figure out who did it so I can get the album.” And then I hear the following lyric: “My best friend Leslie says ‘Oh, she’s just being Miley.’” And I’m like, “Oh, shit. I am totally rocking out to a Miley Cyrus song.”

Whatever. Emotionally, I’m still 11 years old anyway. I just have a big vocabulary; it’s deceiving. It figures that I’d eventually decide to dig Hannah Montana.

Here’s Miley on her way to a recording studio in LA yesterday. And I’ve included “See You Again,” my new favorite song, below.

Here’s newly rehabbed and, coincidentally, newly A-list celeb Eva Mendes doing some shopping at Calvin Klein.

I think it’s funny, because the public never really knew Eva had a drinking or drug problem, because she wasn’t a big enough star for the press to be dogging her every drunken exploit, a la Lohan or Kiki Drunkst. But now that’s she’s actually been in rehab, you better believe the paps are waiting with bated breath to catch her relapse on tape.

Ironic, isn’t it?

I wish you all the best, Ms. Mendes.

Mr. Jamie Spears was awarded continued conservatorship of his daughter until July 31.

His temporary conservatorship was to expire March 10.

Let’s keep Britney alive here, guys!

Julianne Hough is positioning herself as Hollywood’s newest It Girl just waiting to be corrupted.

In a new interview with CosmoGirl, 19-year-old Julianne chats about her ill-fated plans to remain a virgin until marriage.

“I want to be with that special person,” she tells the mag. “I think [the choice] to have sex before marriage is an individual one, but if you’re just with one person, it’s only for one good reason, and [waiting to have sex] will strengthen that relationship. I’m not trying to preach consequences here, but I think when you say no, down the line it will be a better decision … My dad, whom I’m very close with, will text me, ‘Are you doing the right things, in the right place, at the right time?’ And it’s usually when I’m someplace I shouldn’t be. So I’ll call him and say, ‘Thanks, I needed to hear that.’”

Ugh. I hate her already. I can’t wait until she checks into rehab and I can link back to this story and laugh. My dad gave up on that shit with me a long time ago. Now I just get texts from him that read “Are u alive?”

The star’s publicist released this statement today:

“Actor Patrick Swayze has been diagnosed with Pancreatic Cancer and is currently undergoing treatment. Patrick’s physician Dr. George Fisher states, ‘Patrick has a very limited amount of disease and he appears to be responding well to treatment thus far. All of the reports stating the timeframe of his prognosis and his physical side effects are absolutely untrue. We are considerably more optimistic.’ Patrick is continuing his normal schedule during this time, which includes working on upcoming projects. The outpouring of support and concern he has already received from the public is deeply appreciated by Patrick and his family.”

Get better, buddy!!!! We’re cheering you on!!!