Mandy Moore, I’m looking at you.

Andy Roddick got engaged to model Brooklyn Decker.

Andy’s 25 and Brooklyn is 20.

Yeah, this is gonna work out.

A million thanks to the Czech Republic, where Paris Hilton visited while tagging along with Benji Madden on the Good Charlotte tour.

Paris was sporting this scrape on her chin, after she supposedly fell while being swarmed with paparazzi after a show at the Congress Centre.

Whatever. I think one of the roadies finally had the balls to hit her with an upper-cut.

Star magazine, who first issued the story, has printed a retraction:

Sources in a position to have information regarding a secret wedding ceremony between Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie had confirmed to Star that the couple married in the French Quarter Wedding Chapel on Saturday, March 29. “There were two weddings, one planned and one unplanned,” one source told Star. “Brad and Angelina’s was the planned ceremony. The weather wasn’t good, so we were indoors.” After further investigation, the sources are not standing by their story. Brad and Angelina’s reps have not commented.

Someone over at Star is getting FIRED.

Bobby Trendy and Reichen Lehmkuhl share a tender moment at the Tan for a Cause “celebrity mixer” event in Hollywood to support the Reality Cares foundation.

Ugh, I went to one of these events last year to do some interviews. Both Bobby and Reichen were there, as well, but Bobby showed up about four hours late and trashed out of his gourd. It was too funny.

Anyway.

These guys’ll show up anywhere that’ll have them.

Reichen’s still way hot, though, and I’m still single if he changes his mind.

Jennifer Lopez showed up at the NYC premiere of Shine a Light looking significantly lighter herself.

Her husband, the Crypt Keeper, was there, too, but I’m not running his picture because it scares small children.

It just wants Bush out.

Here’s George W. Bush throwing out the opening pitch at a Nationals game. He’s booed throughout the entire thing. The whole damn stadium. Booing.

The commentators mention what a good pitch he threw, and how he, unlike most other Presidents doing the same, actually stood on the pitcher’s mound.

That’s really great, Mr. Bush.

It’s just that whole war in Iraq thing …

Here’s 10 minutes of your life you’re never going to get back. It’s Paris Hilton judging the Miss Turkey pageant.

Around 5:30 she attempts to belly dance. It’s one of the more awkward things I’ve come across this year. It’s like even Paris is like, “Dude, I am in no way qualified to do this. Please. Make it stop.” I mean, I don’t know much about the art of belly dancing, but I’m pretty sure this is a huge affront to it.

Like if America’s Next Top Model traveled to Turkey and they taught the girls to belly dance, and one of the girls did this shit on stage, the end result would undoubtedly be a lengthy lecture by the local expert on how she’s essentially urinated all over the Turkish culture and, were she not here with a CW production crew, would now do jail time.