Oh, God, this is so wonderful!

Paris Hilton is getting yet another reality TV show.

“The show is going to be about her searching for a new best friend,” a source tells Usmagazine.com. “Paris is tired of the haters and she’s looking for someone new. She’s looking for someone new and cool who she can trust.”

The untitled project – expected to be picked up by either MTV or VH1 – will be her second foray in reality television. Hilton’s The Simple Life, costarring pal Nicole Richie, aired from 2003 to 2007.

The new show is “going to be full of good chick drama and you will see a side of Paris not seen on Simple Life,” the source tells Us.

OMG OMG OMG.

Are they holding auditions for this in LA?

Will somebody please find out what it will take for me to be on this show? Seriously? I will sleep with anyone I have to. I need to be on this television show. I am officially calling in every favor ever owed me. Every second-rate field producer I ever banged for coke back in my party-girl days better be on his damn iPhone figuring out what it’s gonna take to get me on this show. I will be Paris Hilton’s new best friend.

Hi guys.

I’m still hella sick, but have woken up for half an hour to bring you the exciting news that Jamie-Lynn Spears passed her GED, which basically confirms that you are smart enough to have graduated high school.

In Louisiana, my understanding is that the test consists of a brief series of questions:

1) What is your name?
2) Do you have children?
3) Do you know their names?
4) If you answered yes to (3), please list names.
5) Do you know their fathers’ names? (Nicknames acceptable.)
6) Have you ever been on a 5150 hold?
7) Can you name any President of any country ever? (Just say yes.)

Anyway, it looks like JLS is considering going to college now, too. Says a friend: “She wants to take her ACT. She’s not wasting any time. People don’t know her. When she gets something in her head, she’ll make it happen. Everybody is so supportive of her.”

Kirsten Dunst was spotted at a Utah target, stocking up on goodies for rehab.

If the early Nielsen numbers hold, last night’s airing of the Oscars was the least-viewed in the past 20 years.

What were you people doing instead???

Honestly, my undying allegiance goes to anyone who walks the red carpet with a pack of Camels and a Bic in his hand.

Here’s the love of my life, Simon Cowell, with girlfriend Terri Seymour at Elton John’s Oscar party.

Love it, love it, love it.

First off, I have to express my thanks to Lars and Evil T. They have been amazing about posting and staying on top of things as I have moved seamlessly from one personal crisis to the next this month. They no longer work for me and I no longer pay them, and they have been doing this purely out of love for me and all things gossip, and I am immensely grateful.

That said, when I saw T’s post about Angelina Jolie’s baby bump, my reaction was the same as some of yours: this is sooooo Photoshopped. That is the fakest-looking damn baby bump ever. I was like, “Where the hell did T find that ridiculous fake photo?” After some research, I discovered the answer: she found it using the WireImage subscription I had specifically instructed her to use.

Yes, folks, that’s a real photo.

To drive home the point, I’ve included here several additional photos from the same event.

She’s either pregnant, or she has the most unfortunate tumor I’ve ever seen.

This song took home the Oscar, and I have to say I was absolutely taken with this little ditty when I saw the film. It’s so simple and beautiful.

I just had to post it.