Gary Coleman Still Hasn’t Fucked His Wife of Six Months
February 14th, 2008 by Evil BeetOkay, so we didn’t really cover the whole thing where Gary Coleman was all like “Hey guys! I got married awhile back!” because it was a dumb story and Gary Coleman is dumb.
But this is just too good to pass up.
Gary told The Insider that he still hasn’t had sex with his 22-year-old bride. He says it’ll happen when it’s meant to happen, and for all the right reasons.
Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.
It’ll never happen, dude.
Before you leave a comment, please make sure you've read our Guide to Commenting. It could save you a great deal of embarrassment.
February 14th, 2008 at 8:45 pm
It dosen’t matter lol. A reliable source said he has a relationship with a super model who posted a profile at a celebs dating site named Richromances.com which is a site for beautiful people. His fans are busy with talking about it now uhmmm~~~~
February 14th, 2008 at 11:46 pm
so she didnt marry him for looks, personality, money, or sex …
baffling.
February 15th, 2008 at 3:49 am
Beet, can we possibly stop susiewww from posting about that damn site?
It’s REALLY getting annoying now!
February 15th, 2008 at 5:11 am
Way too much information, man. I’m shaking my head to empty it of these creepy thoughts…
February 15th, 2008 at 6:26 am
So, to recap, Gary Coleman throws things at her, berates her, and scares her with his temper. He’s a foot shorter than her. He’s 18 years older than her. They’ve shared no conjugal moments. She’s in charge of Coleman merchandising, which is nowhere near as dynamic as Dualstar. He’s pretty much insolvent. But somehow she was attracted to his personality and the way he treats her. This is a Hallmark special waiting to happen.
February 15th, 2008 at 7:43 am
Classic example of woman with NO self esteem and TINY MAN who needs to prob. be in jail for abuse.
February 15th, 2008 at 8:22 am
We all know that Gary is socially retarded. Child Star Curse strikes again!
February 15th, 2008 at 8:25 am
Tarn is right.
February 15th, 2008 at 9:11 am
Maybe it doesn’t reach.
February 15th, 2008 at 9:37 am
hes an angry contolling midget she needs an april divorce
February 15th, 2008 at 9:40 am
She needs to beat him like he stole something and an April divorce.
February 15th, 2008 at 9:42 am
yawn
February 15th, 2008 at 11:03 am
haha she’s totally fucking other people
February 15th, 2008 at 11:22 am
lex is right there is only one virgin in the family
February 15th, 2008 at 11:51 am
*points and laughs*
February 15th, 2008 at 12:05 pm
I’m pretty sure he’s gay.
February 15th, 2008 at 12:15 pm
he needed to reach the stuff on the top shelf people
February 15th, 2008 at 12:25 pm
it’s hard to watch that video and just know that they hate each other already
February 15th, 2008 at 12:30 pm
They don’t need to procreate because they’re both UGLY as hell. Plz don’t make any babies. We already have Brit and LL we need no more crazy ugly kids running around.
February 15th, 2008 at 1:15 pm
Are any of y’all really surprised?? I mean, come ON, now!!
February 15th, 2008 at 2:06 pm
Co-sign with JK. Them kids would be hideous! LOL
February 15th, 2008 at 2:27 pm
Didn’t he run off with a Michael Jackson impersonator that turned him against his parents when he was 18? Dude and that MJ Impersonator checked into a Hawaii hotel as “father and son” for a few weeks. He’s gay, I’m convinced, he is using this chick to get people talking about him. He’s looking for some kind of relevancy.
February 15th, 2008 at 2:42 pm
Oh shit, I can’t stop laughing!
February 16th, 2008 at 7:26 pm
He’ impotent because of his illness–he should have just kept his mouth shut about it–or maybe he is gay either way who cares? I mean really
February 17th, 2008 at 12:20 pm
“what’chu talkin’ ’bout, Willis?”
February 18th, 2008 at 3:21 am
2 WORDS HE UGLY
March 14th, 2008 at 8:45 pm
THAT BITCH IS BUCKLED