Eva Longoria Confuses Me

January 24th, 2008 by Spiteful Lars


Eva Longoria Confuses Me

There are many women I have the “hots” for. It’s just that Eva Longoria isn’t one of them. Yet every marketing effort that surrounds her seems to be on how “sexy” she is.

Take for instance this new movie she’s pimping in this photo, Over Her Dead Body.

Now, in fairness, I haven’t seen it. But I have heard from industry folk that it’s just wretched. And they wouldn’t dare lie to me because I hold grudges forever.

My point (yes, I have one) is this: Let’s just market Eva as the quasi-hot mom. There are worse things to be, right?


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15 Responses to “Eva Longoria Confuses Me”

  1. Artemis says:

    I just don’t get her appeal either.

  2. amanda says:

    horrendous outfit… so eighties. she does nothing for me.

  3. TuTu says:

    I just call it the “large head” theory. Alot of celebs have super large heads compared to their bodies and we are subconsiously attracted to them. *falls off bar stool*

  4. snow cone says:

    MILF is alot hotter than quasi hot mom, right? I don’t get it either~

  5. okay... says:

    she makes it SO easy to dislike her-

  6. lollylicious says:

    her love for texas makes her even more intolerable. fuckin cowboys.

  7. Aurora says:

    I dont get it. She looks like every other brown hair’d spanish chick out there except she doesnt have any hips and she doesnt dress like she was blind.

    She is up ther with Natalie Portman Who?????? YAWN FEST

  8. Ernestine says:

    I don’t like her EEEEEITHERRR!

    Aurora — I think Natalie’s gorgeous! She reminds me of a fawn — all long-lashed and graceful.

    We all have our tastes, though. But Eva is sssooooossososoossoosos generic, IMO.

  9. Pinkey says:

    I tried to like her, really, I did. *sigh*

  10. Persistent Cat says:

    With make-up, I think she’s gorgeous.

    What drives me crazy is how some women just don’t know how to dress simple and elegant. A few months ago, Jessica Simpson showed up to some charity event and wore a frock that nuns wouldn’t even wear. They don’t understand how to dress appropriately so they end up looking like Alexis Carrington or Jessica Fletcher.

    I thought they had stylists.

  11. dodohead says:

    what do you call this outfit???

  12. La-Dee-Dah says:

    I call this outfit Claire Huxtable fucks Desperately Seeking Susan.

  13. erica says:

    i saw that same blouse in the kenneth cole reaction section at macy’s. 4 REALS! i tried it on in white and sent it back to fulfill its destiny as retail garbage with a stop on the clearence rack before a permanent interment at TJ maxx.

  14. xiaoecho says:

    Hate those ‘twin towers’ stockings

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