The driver Britney Spears hired has quit, claiming that driving Britney is a liability.
Sorry posting was slow/non-existent today, guys. I’m really sick. Hopefully tomorrow things will be better and all will be back to normal.
Bitch canceled the rest of her tour. She just can’t handle it, she says, with her hubby in the slammer.
“I can’t give it my all onstage without my Blake. I’m so sorry but I don’t want to do the shows half-heartedly. I love singing. My husband is everything to me and without him it’s just not the same.”
Maybe it’s just not the same to you, but it’s the same to your fans, bitch. You have an obligation to them.
Amy, this has nothing to do with Blake. It has to do with your addiction. You’ve been high as a kite at your past few shows, almost incoherent. You cannot stay sober for a goddamn second with all this stress in your life. That’s the problem.
Go to rehab, bitch.
So last night started out like any other night. We were cooking BBQ in my friend’s backyard, the boys were watching football, I was coughing violently and persistently (I am very sick today, kids, so consider it an expression of my love for you that I am conscious and writing), and we were generally acting like very cool people.
And then my friend starts talking on one of those wireless Bluetooth headsets and the other guys are like, “Oh, man, he’s gone over to the dark side.”
And I mention that with that piece in his ear he looks like those Star Trek aliens that are all like “Resistance is futile. You will be assimilated,” and I’m like, “What was the name of those aliens???” And no one can remember, but my friend with the earpiece is like, “I never watched the ones with Captain Picard. He’s really more of a politician than a leader.”
And I’m like, “What the fuck? How can you say that about Picard? He is the ultimate leader.”
And he’s like, “No, Kirk was a leader,” and I’m like, “Um, no, Kirk was a pussy.”
And this continues for some time until we have to abandon the notion that we are, in any way, the cool kids.
I love me some Jean-Luc.
At the Evening Standard Theatre Awards in London.
Things looked hopeful last night, but Washington Redskins defensive back Sean Taylor did not make it through to morning.
He passed away early Tuesday morning.
He was shot in the groin in his home early Monday morning. The blood loss proved to be too severe, it seems.
I’m sure details will trickle out in time.
“Please respect my family’s privacy at this time with all that we have been through. I care for my wife and my children are my world and I just hope this all works out.”
Works out how? Is Hulkie hoping for a reconciliation???
No statement from Camp Linda yet. Except, ya know, the divorce filing.
Strange things are afoot over at ANTM.
Twiggy will not be appearing as a judge on the upcoming cycle 10. Instead, Paulina Porizkova will take her place as the resident washed-up-model-who-makes-Tyra-Banks’-career-look-particularly-stunning-in-comparison. From the press release:
“We are thrilled to have Paulina as a part of this cycle’s judging panel. The show and participants will benefit a great deal from her vast modeling knowledge and expertise,” said Ken Mok, Executive Producer of AMERICA’S NEXT TOP MODEL.
Twiggy, who has been a part of AMERICA’S NEXT TOP MODEL since cycle 5 is leaving due to scheduling conflicts. “We would like to thank Twiggy for her great contributions to the show. Having an icon like Twiggy lend us her considerable expertise has elevated our show to a whole new level. We wish her well in her endeavors and hope to collaborate with her in future cycles of ANTM as well as other projects.”
Scheduling conflicts?
Whatever.
Word on the street is Twigster didn’t want to be based in NYC, where cycle 10 will be filmed.
By the way, to check out the bottom portion of this picture — and some old-school Paulina Porizkova nip — jump in.
I mean, the hat?
It’s not a cowboy hat.
It’s not even really a top hat.
What type of hat is it, then?
It is the wrong hat. It is the wrong hat, Chris.
With his wife at a screening of The Savages.
Meet Valentina Pinault, two months old.
I love this kid already.
Check out the expression on her face. She’s all like, “What’s up, motherfuckers? Ready for me to turn 18 or what?”
Love it love it love it.
Hulk Hogan’s wife Linda is asking for half their assets in the couple’s divorce.
Linda is seeking to split the couple’s assets, which include the 17,000-square-foot Bel Air mansion where the family primarily lives and a 3,474-square-foot home in Clearwater Beach, Fla., as well as a condo under construction in Las Vegas. The two existing homes alone are worth nearly $9.5 million, the petition says.
Linda also hopes the couple can share custody of 17-year-old son Nick, but custody of Nick may go the State of Florida soon enough. Brooke’s 19, so she’s not an issue here.
The 911 tape from Nick Bollea (Hogan)’s crash in August has been released.
You can listen here.
TampaBay.com is streaming it right now, and I think their server is really overloaded, so if you can’t listen to it now, try back later.
Seriously, I felt something rubbing on my leg at like 3 am last night and woke up screaming, “Stop it, Tony Romo!”
My cat just stared at me.
But seriously this dude is just having sex with everything in the Los Angeles area.
Up now: Jessica Simpson, with whom he spent Thanksgiving in Texas. InTouch is reporting that he’s her boyfriend, but somehow I doubt that. I don’t think he’s anyone’s boyfriend. I think he’s just trying to have sex with more celebrities than Matt Leinart. I think that’s his goal.
I loooooooooove this kind of shit so much.
Someone put pepper spray in Ingrid Marie Rivera, a Miss Puerto Rico contestant’s, dress and make-up, causing her to break out in hives!
Pageant organizers said they hope to catch and expose whoever was responsible for dousing Rivera’s evening gowns with pepper spray and spiking her makeup, causing her to break out in hives.
Police said Monday they have also opened an investigation into the attacks on the beauty queen.
Rivera was composed while appearing before cameras and judges throughout the competition. But once backstage, she had to strip off her clothes and apply ice bags to her face and body, which swelled and broke out in hives twice.
“We thought at first it was an allergic reaction, or maybe nerves,” said pageant spokesman Harold Rosario. “But the second time, we knew it couldn’t have been a coincidence.”
Rivera’s clothing and makeup later tested positive for pepper spray.
You know the best part??
SHE WON ANYWAY!!!!
Rock on, Miss Puerto Rico!!!
