She showed up to the Good Luck Chuck premiere, for reasons that baffle me.

What’s the verdict here, kids?

Update: I finally figured it out!!! It was driving me nuts. She looks like Phoebe from Friends!!!

After posting a $150,000 bond for his bail, OJ Simpson returned home to Miami this morning.

As Simpson flew home to the Miami area, US Airways emptied a plane so he could board first …

Simpson sat in an aisle seat in economy class. Passengers who boarded behind him took pictures with cell phones and cameras. He nodded and smiled as they passed.

With his attorney across the aisle and his girlfriend against his shoulder, Simpson slept from Las Vegas to South Florida. When the plane touched down, he hugged [his attorney].

Oh, O.J. You’re totally going to jail this time.

From Page Six:

MTV doesn’t want the new CW series “Gossip Girl” to overshadow its own gossipy reality show, “The Hills.” MTV wasn’t thrilled when “Hills” stars Lauren Conrad, Audrina Patridge and Whitney Port RSVP’d to go to the “Gossip Girl” premiere event at Tenjune the other night. An insider said, “MTV saw their names on the tip sheet and didn’t want their stars promoting a competing show.” The “Hills” girls, who hosted an event for the musical “Legally Blonde” instead, hung out later with the “Gossip Girl” cast at Marquee. A rep for MTV said, “The girls’ hosting duties were on their schedule for weeks.”

So did anyone watch Gossip Girl last night? How was it?

Now that the Jolie-Pitts have enrolled their eldest in a ridiculously ritzy school on the Upper East Side — and refuse to have nannies take him to and from — the paparazzi know exactly where they can find these folks, day in and day out.

I do think it’s funny, though, how they go as a couple to pick him up, creating a paparazzi frenzy. I mean, really, guys, would it be all that big a deal to send a nanny in to get him? Or just have one of his teachers bring him out to the tinted-windowed car? Because Maddox Jolie-Pitt — not to mention the rest of his class — is going to have the most twisted idea about what school is. Okay, okay. When your elementary school costs $20K/year, you’re definitely going to have a twisted idea about what school is. But when your walk to and from school is basically the Oscars red carpet minus Joan Rivers? By the time he’s in third grade, Mad’s going to have to start taking a publicist with him to school to tell him which reporters to talk to and remind him who he’s wearing and who did his backpack. Giuliana DePandi’s gonna be all like, “I’m loving your JanSport. We’re really seeing that come back this season.” This kid’s spelling tests are going to run on Page Six. The entire staff of the Post is going to have to learn how to speak elementary French so they can weigh in on his book reports. I’m so excited.

Check out Sarah Jessica Parker and Chris Noth (aka Mr. Big) on location for the Sex and the City movie.

Seeing as how SJP is married, I think this means there’s a little lovin’ going on between Carrie and Big in the film.

Hooray!!!!!!!!!!

America’s Next Hot Porn Star is just getting started!

The show, which airs on iNDemand pay-per-view, follows 12 women who hope to break into the porn business.

They held a press conference last night in NYC. What do you guys think?

Seriously, I didn’t think anything could be better than Cathouse, but this just might be it.

Want more? Be sure to check out our crotch shot galleries and nip slip galleries.

Update: Because I love you guys, I tracked down some YouTube clips:

Hurrah!!!

Sorry about the recent down time, my loves. We had to move over to a different server, and we had some downtime in the process.

Or, as my sage roommate described it, “website go boom.”

The good news is that we should now have no downtime due to an overloaded server. And, if we do, I’m fucking switching hosts.

Posting will now resume as normal. Thanks for putting up with this bullshit.

xoxo
Beet