A Lohan family friend, Gina Glockman, recently gave this account of events to Entertainment Tonight:

Lindsay was having a get-together at her home. Several people say she wasn’t drinking, that she didn’t even have a drink, but at a certain point in the night, apparently, she fell off the wagon and did start drinking.

When assistant TARIN GRAHAM walked into the house and looked disheveled with teary red eyes, Lindsay was concerned that something happened to her.

There was some sort of altercation. Tarin either quit or Lindsay fired her. Tarin left and Lindsay followed her.

There were definitely two people in the car with Lindsay that night.

Tarin’s mother apparently made a police call because she was afraid someone was chasing her.

Right now, we don’t know who may have been chasing her. It could have been paparazzi.

When the cops arrived, there were so many people in the parking lot that they automatically zoomed in on Lindsay. Apparently the altercation took place at about 1:30 a.m.

Lindsay was strong-armed into taking a breathalyzer test. They say the cocaine was not Lindsay’s; she was wearing someone else’s pants.

Dina got a call from Lindsay at about 5 a.m. and she was talking so fast Dina couldn’t even understand what she was saying … she was just like, ‘Mommy, mommy, mommy,’ and very upset in the conversation.

For the past two years, Dina’s been trying to get Lindsay to leave L.A. and come to N.Y. so she can be with all of her children.

Obviously she’s been going through a tough time and it would be best for her to come to N.Y., to be with her family right now, take some time off, get into a rehab center and bascially give herself a chance to be healthy right now.

They say her life is at risk. Lindsay suffers an addiction. It’s not about Lindsay’s career right now. It’s about saving her life.

Dina and Lindsay have been talking every hour. They’re texting constantly, they’re on the phone.

Not only does Dina have to deal with Lindsay’s crisis right now, but she also has to appear in court this Friday and Monday because she’s in a custody battle for all four of her children.

Lindsay could be traveling from L.A. to N.Y. right now to possibly be admitted into rehab.

On a programming note, I’m at home visiting my family right now, so posting may be slower than usual. And, with any luck, we’ll get some very special posts from my mom and sister before the week is over, which should be funny because neither of them knows or cares about celebrities. My sister the oceanographer wants to know if she can blog about phytoplankton. I told her that as long as it ties into Lindsay Lohan, she sure can. So we’ll see how that goes.

I’ve been a bit despondent with all of this news of Brit Brit’s total collapse. I knew she was always a crazy person but I had a faint hope that she was on an upswing after the past few years.

I found this commercial that was made at the height of her popularity. Remember the hot Pepsi ad that made you want Britney’s body. Well here it is. All we can do is remember the good times…

Jessica Alba is back on the market and ready to be slutty!

The Fantastic Four star has dumped her longtime boyfriend, Cash Warren, reportedly telling him on the phone, “I’m not in love with you anymore.”

A source close to Cash says that it “happened…almost out of nowhere. [Cash] thinks it’s for another guy but doesn’t know….he’s totally devastated. But it was all her.”

Alba, as you may recall, made headlines back in June for professing a laid-back attitude about sex: “I feel like a lot of women try to make it into more,” she said, “so they don’t feel so bad about just wanting to have sex. I don’t really have a problem with just wanting sex. Never have.”

I think I speak for all the men in America when I say: Bring it on, Jess!

I wonder who she’ll end up dating. I think I’d love it if she stole Justin Timberlake away from Jessica Biel. My money’s on that.

For those of you who were wondering what the hell good was that alcohol-detecting ankle strap Lindsay was wearing prior to her DUI — it looks like it worked, but it needs to come with GPS.

The device did sound — two hours before Lindsay’s arrest — and her lawyer, Blair Berk, was notified. Berk, like the rest of us, knows what happens when alcohol enters Lindsay’s system, so she was desperately, but unsuccessfully, trying to find the starlet in those two hours.

Unfortunately, Lindsay was in custody just two hours later. Once Lindsay consumes alcohol, it doesn’t take long for her to end up in trouble. Linds, that’s why you can’t drink, ever!

This guy must have one hell of a personality, because he’s totally fug, he’s not exactly packing (unless you count his balls — you could pack for a week-long vacation in those things), and yet his band’s fan base seems to start and end with Hollywood It girls. Honestly, does anyone you actually know in real life listen to Whitestarr?

Cisco Adler, the rocker who’s been linked to Mischa Barton and Kim Stewart, finally jumped on the Paris Hilton train this week.

The scariest scene at Guy’s karaoke night on Tuesday wasn’t Paris “singing,” it was her make-out session with ballsy Cisco Adler!

A TMZ spy spotted Hilton and Mischa Barton’s grungy ex-boyfriend kissing all over each other at the club last night, with Paris going so far as to give Adler a little lap dance. Careful of the boys!

When she wasn’t getting randy in the crowd, Paris graced the stage with a rendition of “Bette Davis Eyes,” followed by a medley of her hit “Stars are Blind.”

Woah, wait. You’re telling me there’s drama between Cardinals quarterback/playboy Matt Leinart and his baby mama? [Socialite Life]

Mary Louise Parker’s all like, “Look, guys, I won a fucking Emmy for this shit. And if I want to get butt naked, that’s exactly what I’ll do.” [popbytes]

Dina Lohan: “We are trying to strategically work out our next step.” Are you now? For your ex-husband, that strategic next step was Larry King. I’m sure yours will be Entertainment Tonight. Meanwhile, your daughter’s going to jail. [POTP]

The history of the drunk dial. [College Humor]

Honestly, Matt Dillon, where do you get off being angry at the one paparazzi on the planet who still wants to take your pictures? [Agent Bedhead]

From Page Six:

LUKE Wilson had to change his cellphone number this weekend, thanks to an annoying prank by his pal Johnny Knoxville. The “Jackass” star found out Wilson was going to hang out at the Polaroid Beach House in Malibu for the Boost Mobile party Saturday and hired a plane to hover above the place with a banner that read: “Luke Wilson’s phone number 3105000082.” Apparently, it was his real number. It’s now out of service. But Wilson decided not to hang at the beach, probably because he had to deal with all the annoying calls.

Remember all that talk about Paula Abdul choreographing the upcoming live-action Bratz movie? I know everyone was excited to watch a group of teenage actresses stumble across stages, burst randomly into tears, do the seal clap and trip over chihuahuas, but it looks like we may not be treated to that. Paula was informed that her services were not actually needed.

PAULA Abdul was fired via e-mail from the live-action movie “Bratz,” as a TV camera re corded her tearful reaction. On this week’s episode of “Hey Paula,” Abdul’s self-aggrandizing reality show on Bravo, the loopy “American Idol” judge is shown crying after she receives a message from real “Bratz” producers telling her that her services are no longer wanted. She had claimed she was the film’s choreographer, costume designer and executive producer. The episode shows perma-victim Abdul screaming, “How can they treat me this way?” Our source said, “Paula was not ever really a part of the movie, and she was a night mare to deal with. There was no way that was going to work.” A rep for Lionsgate said, “We love Paula, and we were sorry the partnership wasn’t able to come together.”

Heh. “Perma-victim.” That’s a really good way to describe Paula Abdul on that show.