I love Lily Allen, and I hate to do this to her, but this is really one of the greatest nip slips I’ve seen in awhile. Lily’s entire breast slipped way out of her shirt during a press conference at the Bonnaroo music festival in England recently, and, of course, there were no shortage of cameras there to immortalize the moment. Jump in for the uncensored version. I gotta say, though: nice tits, Lily. I can see why you were the blow job queen back in high school.

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I stood up for her for a long time, saying she was naturally thin, but I think even I have to back down now. These pics were taken at Mansion in Miami late last night. She pretty much looks like a bobble-head doll. She was not this thin on the show, you guys. She was thin, but not anorexia thin. This is anorexia thin. She has definitely lost weight since, which seems impossible, considering how damn thin she was to begin with. Oh, Jaslene!!! We can never have our torrid lesbian love affair if you get all ED-ugly. Please eat and be pretty and adorable and cha-cha diva again!!!

Well, if anyone should be shooting up heroin, it’s probably Angelina Jolie, because Lord knows she has thick enough veins. The Skid Row crew is super jealous.

Anyway, we’ve heard talk over the past few months of Angie’s rapid weight loss and her atypically rude behavior toward reporters, but people have seemed generally to attribute it to the stress of coping with her mother’s death. Now, Ted Casablancas tells a different story in this thinly veiled blind item:

Some people love Fake-à-la Ferocity…the rest live to hate her. This do-it-all diva, known to dabble in everything from fab sex to fabber shoes, has her hand in purty much everything these days. Endorsements. Charitable endeavors. Entertainment projects. You name it. And all the wowin’ while, Fake-à-la manages to look super-duper delish in the process. Well, she used to, at least.

Lately, F2’s once enviable bod has changed for the worse. And her hunky man isn’t the only person concerned about the once divinely gifted babe. Nope, now a very few inside Industry types are also concerned ’bout our gal Fakey.

See, F.F. has enjoyed a fairly good reputation in the media and rags…until recently. She’s known for being accessible, candid and honest. How very friggin’ heretical here in lip-cemented T-town!

Apparently, Ms. Ef’s hiding one helluva secret. And I’m the bitch to fill ya in on what, exactly, it is that has those select few Hollywood movers ‘n’ shakers so shaking in their Prada wear, regarding Fakey. She’s got what’s known as…a heroin habit.

Well, she’s hardly the first dame in this drug-infested enclave to fall down that slippery alley, right? It’s just, uh, so damn rich to find this out, knowing how utterly benevolent our do-goodin’ broad happens to be as of late.

Gosh, wonder how long before everyone finds out what’s really behind Fake-à-la’s rapidly withering figure? It’ll be “Paris who?” should that happen, trust.

Could it be true? Angelina Jolie on heroin? I don’t know if I buy this, but far be it from me to argue with Ted Casablancas …

Introducing Phoebe Price. If you don’t know her she really is the go to girl for fashion disasters. This girl has been whoring herself out to the camera for years now and the only reason that she gets her picture taken is because she wears things like this. This gold jacket really makes her look like she should be in some Scientology training video. I also love how her bangles match the jacket.

According to Imdb she is an “International Actress and Model.” I really think that should be changed to “Professional Fashion Don’t.” So in the spirit of covering my bases with the fashion disasters of Hollywood in general I present Phoebe Price.

I think it’s probably the former.

That kid must be so comfortable. 11-day-old River Russell Deary goes everywhere with Mom in NYC. I kind of wish they made those things in an adult size, so when my mom’s in town she could carry me around like that. Or my friends and I could just take turns carrying each other around. Like instead of having designated drivers we could have designated carriers. It would be like, “Look, Tiffany, I walked last weekend. This weekend you walk and I get to ride in the pouch. No, I don’t care if your boyfriend said he’d put you in his pouch this weekend. You have an obligation to put me in your pouch tonight. Is that clear?”

Holy crap, they are actually going to do this.

It looks like the Spice Girls reunion has moved past the realm of pure hope and into reality. A press release today from the group’s management team, 19 Entertainment, reads: “Following weeks of speculation, the Spice Girls are set to make an official announcement to the world regarding future plans on Thursday, June 28. Details regarding the announcement will be released in the coming days.”

Earlier this week, a memo from the girls’ management team urging them to “not become pregnant — please!” leaked to a British tabloid, further fueling the rumors that there would be a reunion. The members of Spice have pursued solo careers since their last release as a group in 2000, and have been met with varying levels of success in the U.S. and abroad. None has been able to recapture the hype of the Spice Girls.

In related news, it’s an extra good day for Spice Girl Mel B., who yesterday received the test results proving that actor Eddie Murphy is the father of her two-month-old baby. After the two split last year, Murphy told reporters that “I don’t know whose child that is until it comes out and has a blood test.”

That girl is totally, like, the most badass two-year-old at the International Preschool in Prague.

It’s just that, you know, most two-year-olds like to wear shirts with kittens on them. Or puppies. Or a rainbow. Or Barney. Or something they can recognize. I really don’t think that Zahara’s in a position yet to appreciate the 1970s-British-heavy-metal coolness of her t-shirt. What do you think Brad tells her when she asks about what’s on her shirt?

And she is sooo adorable. Seriously, does Angelina have, like, a software program to help determine exactly how adorable a baby will be when she becomes a toddler? Or does spending that much time around the most beautiful couple in the world just make anyone hot?

Also, where’s Maddox in all this? Why doesn’t he have to go to school?

Despite the persistent rumors that their marriage is in trouble, Courteney Cox and David Arquette look happy as ever as they leave an event at Kitson in WeHo last night. I don’t know why the tabloids keep trying to break these two up. I think they’re the real thing.