Yesterday, I wanted to run the George Michael story with the headline “George Michael’s Double Whammy,” but she’d beat me to it. Today, she ran a Bobby Brown story as “Fleeing Bobby Brown,” which I used as a Bobby headline on Film.com a couple weeks ago.

Harumph.

Too late. It’s okay, though. It was the horse one anyway.

Hi all! Quick note from management. First, thanks to everyone who comes by this site each day to check out what’s new and hot in celeb gossip. You guys rock!!!

Secondly, I’ve begun writing the celeb gossip blog for Film.com. It is an awesome site, with all sorts of cool info on movies, TV, DVD and celebs, written by some of the best bloggers in the blogosphere (tooting my own horn a bit, I suppose). Don’t worry — I’ll still be here writing on The Beet every day, but if you want more Evil Beet scoop with less Evil Beet swearing (or if your grandma does), be sure to check out Film.com.

Thanks!

- The Beet

A clip from House of Carters. What an ass. And it appears Aaron Carter has a habit of picking up his brother’s sloppy seconds.

Eric “McSteamy” Dane has officially joined the cast of Grey’s Anatomy. It’s nice that he has a steady gig — it’ll make my mother less wary of the fact that I’m going to marry an actor. And, with any luck, he’s Jewish.

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ai61hBsJcLo]

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uhOvi5eeHWc]

From the British documentary, The Return of Courtney Love. In the first clip, a now-sober Courtney discusses practicing Buddhism and chanting — she chants for, among other things, Lindsay Lohan and horses. In the second, she pulls out the coat in which Kurt killed himself.

Get the uncensored version here. See what happens when you try to have the ‘razzi charged with assualt, Cam? YOUR TIT ENDS UP ON THE INTERNET. Did you learn your lesson?

I was so excited to run this with the headline “George Michael’s Double Whammy,” but E! Online got to it first. Damn.

I’d rather not be so harsh as to say “George Michael was found intoxicated and passed out at the wheel of his car for the second time in eight months.” Instead, let’s look at it as “George Michael was found intoxicated and passed out at the wheel of his car for the first time since February!” Because eight months is an admirable length of time to stay conscious at the wheel when you drink and drive like he does. Michael was arrested early Sunday morning in London on suspicion of drug possession, after being awoken, of course.

His partner, Kenny Goss, said “He’s fine and I’ve got him a McDonalds,” from which we can conclude only that Goss himself was still drunk at the time of the interview. Best of luck to Michael and Goss, and to the entire city of London. And, E! Online, I call dibs on the “Triple Whammy” headline in May.

(Hey Tiffy — it’s not quite the coke arrest we were hoping for, but I think we can say our prayers were answered.)

Ugh.

Please, people, for the love of all that’s holy, watch House of Carters. Because he’s not going to stop until you do. And if we have to find out that he made a sex tape involving mice in condoms and Liza Minnelli, no one wins.

• Eva Longoria and Tony Parker split, Amanda Peet makes that baby legit.
• Jessica Simpson has reached that really unattractive point of depression-induced apathy. It’s a beautiful thing to behold.
• Drunk much, Beyonce?
• Pamela Anderson’s nipple has Hep C.

But I’m still holding out for an apology for her first two albums.